The Hardest Part Of Letting Go Is Holding On
by Heartaches and Cheap Wine
Summary: Dean only has a few days to go and is living it up, Sam thinks he has a way out and who is that old woman stalking them? DeanOC Read and Review PLEASE?
1. So This Is What Normal Feels like?

Disclaimer: I Own Naomi and My Imagination. anything else isnt mine Just borrowin!

Warnings: None, yet...but c'mon its me...

Spoilers: None

A/N: Right, i need you guys to help me on this one, any helpful hints, on idea's, how to improve, if i shoud give up... would be great! either review or pm me!

So thats about it... Enjoy?

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Sam looked across the room, his eyes adjusting to the darkness as he tried to make out Dean's form in his bed. Sam rubbed his aching eyes, it was around four thirty in the morning and Sam was bone tired. For the past two weeks he had been looking for ways to save Dean from this deal he had made.

They all had. Well everyone except Dean. He was alright just to sit back and eat as much fatty crap as he wanted, drink like a fish and be as reckless on the last four hunts they had been on. Sam wanted him to help so badly, even if he just read _one_ book or made _one _Goddamned phone call, Sam would be happy but he hadn't and he wasn't going to.

A small noise made Sam turn his head from the book that was at least one hundred times as thick as the bible and a million times more boring, Sam smiled sweetly as she snuggled down into Dean, his arm threw loosely over her tanned waist, her head tucked into the space that was between his jaw and shoulder. She just seemed to _fit_ into him no matter what way they were sitting, laying, standing, kneeling, whatever, she just managed to adjust her body to fit his.

Sam grinned closing the book, he would be of no use to them if he was dead from exhaustion. Sam set the book and torch on the night stand and shimmied down the bed turning so his back was to the opposite bed. They were known to start the day with a few rounds of one on one and Sam was dead cert that he didn't wanna open his eyes to _that__…_

…Sure she was as pretty as all those airbrushed models in those stupid magazines she buys then leaves in their motel room when she gets back in her Classic black 69' mustang and makes the long drive from where ever they where to Layton, Florida to get back to work. Sam snuggled into the pillow counting the cigarette stains on the wall and the different ridges where the furniture had been moved and moved back then moved again. Another muffled groan and Sam smiled , they'd argue next, Dean would huff--

"Naomi?" Dean shook her gently, "Naomi?" concern laced his voice breaking Sam's concentration and causing him to turn around.

"Mmhmm?" she breathed blinking open languid eyes. Dean huffed slightly but lowered his head and kissed her gently on the lips, before telling her to go back to sleep. She protested but Dean just shushed her with another kiss and pulled her into him.

Sam was staggered by Dean's actions. Deep down he knew his dumbass of a brother was capable of it but he had just never _seen_ him like this, well he had but he wasn't supposed to remember it well, in all honesty he wasn't sure _how _he could have remembered it but that was another thought for another sleepless night.

The first strands of daylight filtered into the room and Sam rolled over into his side and then back again. He shook his head and Dean let out a slow laugh. "So not cool." Sam droned, furiously rubbing his eyes as though he could remove the image of Dean and Naomi from his mind.

He felt his bed dip and opened his eyes opened to look into a dazzling set of ocean blue eyes. Naomi pushed her fringe out of her face and smiled a really lazy smile. The sun that filtered through the blinds cast shadows across her shapely figure, it seemed to illuminate her good points and shadow her few bad points. Confused by the look on her face he slowly sat up suddenly feeling self conscious around her. She giggled making Sam blush furiously.

Dean looked across from the other bed, then made the short few steps to Sam's bed where he sat down behind Naomi, nuzzling her hair then her shoulder. "No way you guys that's just weird, its sick!" he mumbled out pulling the blankets up around his chest. Dean and Naomi looked at each other, confusion etched on their faces, before Naomi burst into fits of laughter, nearly tumbling off of the bed.

"No Sammy," she giggled, reaching behind Dean and presenting the little cup cake with the candle in it to Sam. "Happy Birthday, you little pervert." she leaned forward and kissed his cheek. Sam was dumbfounded. He hadn't remembered but they had, well she had at least.

Dean smiled and pushed a little box along the bed. Couldn't have been more than eight maybe nine inches long, four at the most wide. Sam bit down on his lip unsure of what was in the box. As if reading his mind Dean pushed the box further towards Sam's free hand. Setting the cake down on the bed side table he picked the box up running his fingers over the shiny paper and satin ribbon and bow. He breathed out and looked up.

"Oh For Heavens Sake Sammy, the box wont open itself now will it?!" Dean questioned, the suspense beginning to torture him. Naomi nudged him in the ribs, a painful hint for him to shut up, one that he always took no matter the circumstances. Sam took hold of the bow and tugged gently, not wanting to spoil it.

Opening the paper and bow took what seemed like forever. Sam sucked in a breath when he opened the box and pushed back the layer of tissue paper. Running his fingers over the smooth metal his eyes began to fill with tears; to many people this would seem like just a dagger but as he ran his fingers over his initials, then up the smooth blade again, he realised that it was far from a normal dagger. There were ten in the set. This was the tenth. He grinned up at Dean. He had remembered. Sam placed the dagger carefully back in the box like he had done for the past few years.

When he was sixteen he had spotted them in this ammo shop he was in. Dad had told him no, that they had enough knifes in the car but for his 17th birthday Dean had given him the two largest blades then every year gave him one, even when he was at Stanford. Sam set the box on the bed and leant forward hugging Naomi close as he patted Dean's shoulder. "Like it?" Dean asked and Sam smiled.

"I love it Dean, " Sam sighed grabbing for the dagger again.

"You're new favourite?" Naomi half joked as she stood up, fingers raking through Dean's short hair. "I'm gonna go shower up then we'll take you for breakfast ok?" she whispered looking at Sam as she tilted Dean's head up to give him a kiss.

The front of her hair fell forward covering they're faces as her hands cupped his jaw. She pulled back, licking her lips as she made her way around the bed and into the bathroom.

"She's amazing." Sam whispered as he unfolded himself from the covers in the bed and Dean laughed running his fingers through the path hers had taken just a few moments before.

"And she's mine," Dean laughed as he lightly punched Sam on the shoulder.

"Yeah, and you deserve to be happy." Sam smiled at Dean.

"Look Man for just one day can we forget about this and hang out enjoy your birthday?" Dean asked as he stood up next to his not-so-little brother. Sam smiled but didn't say anything just a simple half nod in half agreement. Dean looked towards the bathroom door and Sam let out a laugh.

"On you go I think I can go two minutes without you." Sam said playfully and Dean punched him on the arm again.

"Gonna be a lot longer than two minutes if I have anything to do with it." He winked as he pushed open the door.

"Sure." Sam retorted sarcasm dripping off of the word. _So this is what normal feels like?_ he thought as he poured himself a coffee and Naomi shrieked.


	2. Sammy There's No Way You're Serious

Sam smirked into his coffee as Dean raised an eyebrow. "You know I've seen some weird stuff in my life Sammy but that has to be the weirdest." Dean concluded as she snaked his arm around the back of the booth onto Naomi's shoulders.

She nearly choked on her latte. Dean raised an eyebrow at her but she smiled and fought to get the shocked look off of her face. Dean sniggered and drew her to him causing her to nearly pass out with fright. Sam laughed whole heartedly. Naomi giggled too, Dean wasn't into PDA's but if it made Sam smile then it was worth it.

She snuggled into Dean's shoulder as they both cut up her pancakes into little bites. Sam laughed as she stuffed a bit into her mouth, the syrup running down her chin and Dean and her fighting to get it. Dean's cell rang and Sam leaned forward to get it knowing full well Dean was too determined to get the syrup from Naomi's lips and chin.

Dean kissed his way up the trail until her was extracting the last few tastes from

her mouth. He looked around, startled, when Sam suddenly barked out laughter. Dean's brow furrowed and Sam tapped the table and bit on his lip to get himself under control. The waitress passed and drew him a glare. Naomi kicked Sam under the table and his tear streaked face lifted to look at hers. "What. The. Hell. Sammy?" she asked as Sam wiped his face.

"You two are not gonna believe this." he stated before bursting into fits of laughter again.

"Well obviously not if you can tell us." Dean said deadpan. Sam just continued to laugh at him.

"We're leaving." Naomi said as she paid the bill the waitress had brought over to them. Sam nodded and practically waddled out to the Impala parked proudly beside a Ford and a black Corsa.

Naomi took off her leather jacket threw it in the backseat of the car before climbing in after it. Dean rolled his eyes and got behind the wheel as Sam lent against the door laughing.

"Dude I don't get what the hell you find so funny?!" Dean stated as they pulled over at the motel, Sam still laughing making both Naomi and Dean increasingly mad. Naomi threw open the car door and hauled Sam out throwing him against the car.

"OK Birthday or not, this isn't actually funny. Now spill!" She commanded as she gripped his collar.

"Case!" Sam said and creased up again and Naomi rolled her eyes before letting him go and walking into the room. "Hey, Wait up I'm gonna tell you!"

Naomi tapped her foot on the floor as her and Sam waited for Dean to come out of the bathroom. "Hurry Up! What are you? A girl?" she asked and Sam laughed.

"I'm not coming out!" came the slightly muffled reply and Sam rolled his eyes, Naomi bit her tongue and tried to swallow her anger.

"Why?" they said in unison. The bathroom door creaked open and Naomi's eyes widened and her jaw fell slightly. Sam raised an eyebrow as Dean stood, with his hands on his hips. Naomi stood up and nodded, her voice failing her at this point.

"Go on. Say it." Dean spat as he crossed his arms over his chest, Naomi blinked a few times as though trying to work out what he meant. "I look Stupid." he stated for her.

"I wouldn't exactly say _that_." Naomi winked at him and she could see Dean's eyebrow raise under the mask. Sam giggled and opened the door realising how stupid they looked.

"I'll take my car with Sammy, you take yours it'll be easier that way." Dean said as he opened the Impala door.

"Good thinking Batman!" Naomi winked and Dean glared. Sam began to laugh again as he climbed into the Impala. Naomi kinked an eyebrow and shut the door before Dean could even think about a retort.


	3. All Fun And Games And Pain And Flames

Dean smirked when he handed the door man the ticket. Batman and Wonder Woman. Hilarious. Batman and Wonder Woman _and _Superman even funnier. This case? Down right laugh for a week, side splitting.

Naomi tugged on his arm leading them into a room with vampires, witches, gods, goddesses, ghosts, angels, devils, you name it, it was there. Naomi wasn't a dress-up type of girl. She preferred her lived in jeans, tank top, and normal shoes like trainers or ballet pumps. But oh no, Sammy had picked this one and _damn_ did that boy know how to dress a girl to please Dean.

Truth be told he didn't care what she had on when she was with him as long as she was with him, but, he couldn't help the smile that graced his features when every guy in the room stopped to stare at her. Sam and Naomi had argued for nearly an hour about whether it should be the hot pant/pants or the skirt… Sammy having won with his choice, best choice in Dean's opinion, of hot pants.

The original wonder woman had nothing on Naomi. Her long tanned legs easily pulled off the red and white knee high boots and blue and white starred hot pants, the gold and red corset fitted like it was painted onto her skin and that cute little hat was actually quite sexy with the long brunette wig that she had protested about even when they arrived because she didn't need it, her hair _was_ brown. Sam had laughed her off and forced her to the door. "Dean?" Naomi waved a beer in his face.

"We're working." Sam hissed over her shoulder taking the beer from her before she abruptly spun around and yanked it out of his gigantic _paws,_ because _hands,_ well _hands_ aren't that big. Sam's eyes widened when he heard Naomi _growl_. She never actually _hunted _as such she was generally bait or the decoy or someone to help them gather information. She didn't want to be part of it mostly because she didn't, _doesn__'__t,_ believe in what they did. She took a long swig of her drink and Sam glared.

"Find this thing so I can leave," she hissed pulling the cloak further around her. Dean smirked then scanned the room. "You wont be able to recognise him or her or it smart ass!" Naomi glared and Dean raised an eyebrow.

"Really? And you would know all about it because you're the demonic extraordinaire!" Dean spat and Naomi laughed.

"Rich coming from you jackass. Mr I-cant-feel-a-thing!" she seethed.

"Oh yeah cause that has everything to do with it!" he snarled at her and she _growled_ again.

"You know what, Screw You Winchester!" She screeched and slammed the bottle onto the table.

"Ha! I think you've already did that." he grinned and she slapped him. Sam huffed under his mask and grabbed her arm before she did it again.

"Eh, you guys are aware everyone is watching you right?" he hissed as Naomi struggled against his grip. Dean glared and rubbed his cheek where he was sure her handprint was. Naomi's breathing was a pant now, her chest rising and falling visibly with every gasping breath.

Naomi yanked her hand free of Sam and walked outside. Sam followed her and turned her to him. Her eyes were full of tears and he smiled. "Don't worry Mimi." he kissed her head. "He'll get over it." she smiled at that and hugged him back, before getting into the car and pulling away. Dean appeared at Sam's back and threw his mask on the ground. Sam smirked. "we could always go after her?" he sighed and Dean shook his head.

Two hours later when they had finally tracked the demon down Dean lent over it, colt to the head. "You think killing me will save her?" it spat and Dean pulled the trigger. Then again. And again. Sam watched as Dean pulled out his cell and dialled her number.

"Naomi?" he spoke softly.

"Deeeaannnn!".


	4. Keep Me In You're Memory

Dean slammed the cell closed and made a break for the car. Sam raised an eyebrow but ran with Dean all the same knowing for a fact that he probably would leave his ass here. Dean could hear that demon mocking him, it's stupid voice in his head going round and round. Playing over and over.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. He hit has hands off of the steering wheel of the Impala as he revved up her engine. Why didn't he heed the warnings? Why didn't he _see_ the warnings that where right there in front of him? His vision blurred and Sam grabbed the wheel steering from the passenger side. Dean rubbed his eyes and regained control of the car.

"_Cupid?" Naomi looked exasperated when Sam choked the word out. "You guys are hunting cupid!?" she struggled to keep her straight face this time. Dean had cracked up a long time ago and there she was: standing in the middle of the motel room, her favourite worn with holes in, stone washed blue denim jeans clinging to her hips and her little white tank top attached to her curves. _

_Dean was amazed at how white she could keep trainers. She exhaled and then laughed, she couldn't not laugh at that. Sam stopped laughing so hard to get his laptop to do some research on CUPID. The concept was still strange to him as he typed in the search. Naomi kinked an eyebrow as Sam stopped laughing. _

_"So it turns out there is a demonic cupid." he stated as he stared at the screen. "Oh Great!" he huffed and folded his arms._

_"What?" Dean asked as he made his way over to bring the other chair into the room. Naomi kinked an eyebrow, she knew she probably wouldn't get what he was about to say but was interested anyway. _

_"It takes on human form making it unable to tell who it is." He huffed and Naomi bit the inside of her cheek._

_"Sam? No disrespect but isn't that point?" she asked and Sam looked at her. "Like you don't know he exists that's why you fall in love?" _

_"Naomi, we're not hunting _Cupid._ we're hunting his evil counter part, like evil Santa," he nodded at her and she looked confused._

_"Still struggling to grasp good and evil?" Dean asked looking at her. She nodded blushing softly, averting her gaze from him. She did feel stupid at not believing what they did, but it seemed so silly, no matter how many times she saw them (ghosts, werewolves, poltergeists) she still didn't believe. _

_It was because she was a daddies girl at heart, Dean had once told her. Her had had told her there was no such thing, so, holding her Dad as her hero, she believed in everything he said to her. Dean stood up and brushed his hand along her shoulders as he made his way to the bathroom, a silent indication that it was OK no-one was disappointed in her. _

_"It gets better by the way," Sam said when Dean came out of the bathroom with a shocked look on his face.. Naomi's gaze fell on Dean and he smiled at her. She knew then everything wasn't alright. _

_"Oh Yeah?" Dean asked as he pulled his flannel shirt off and threw it in the laundry duffle. _

_"Well, it's like a spirit but it can't be exorcised." Sam looked at Dean. _

_"How'd you kill it?" Naomi asked from the duffle bag she was rummaging through and tossed Dean a clean set of clothes. Dean smiled gratefully then looked at Sam._

_"Salt and burn it." _

_"ALIVE!" Naomi shrieked and Dean's eyes widened. _

_"Yeah," Sam shrugged as though it was an everyday occurrence and he didn't understand why she was so upset about it._

_"__But it__'__s_ human." _Naomi protested, becoming more and more distressed. Dean dumped the clothes on the bed and made his way over to her. He wasn__'__t the best at this but seeing as Sammy wasn__'__t making any effort to console the 28 year old, Dean slipped his arms around her and cradled her to him. She hated anyone to see her cry, she hated him seeing her cry but she had accepted that it was Ok, it was OK for Sam to see her cry too. _

_Dean wasn't surprised to feel her hot tears on his neck as his hand made soothing circles on her back. For the badass chick she made herself out to be, she was incredibly sensitive beneath it all. Tough on the outside but not all the way through, she had a very fragile heart Dean had learned early on too; when her mother passed away shortly after his Dad had gone AWOL. _

_He seen similarities between himself and her, he had once wondered if that was why he was drawn to her. She was just like him. Naomi kissed Dean's neck, a silent indication that she was ok ad he could go back to whatever he was doing. "Sam?" she whispered as Dean kissed her head as he let her go. Sam looked up. "Where is the case?" she asked softly her blue eyes always had that glassy look when she was sad._

_"Here." he stated as he turned the laptop screen so as she could see it._

_"College students?" she looked at Sam and Dean was leaning over her shoulder._

_"Yeah three couples have been killed so far."_

_"Starts with an argument then the girl is usually found with her throat slit." she read and screwed up her face. Sam sighed. _

_"Someone else is gonna die in the time it takes us to track the thing down." Dean huffed and Naomi bit her lip._

_"Maybe not," she muttered before moving over to the green and white spotted weekend bag that she always had with her. After some confused looks and lots of rummaging later Naomi turned to the boys with a little blue leaflet with pink writing on it. _

"_There's a fancy dress party tonight," she looked up from the paper. "Some guy thought I was a student and left it on my windshield on the drive in to town when I stopped for gas." she looked at Dean then Sam. "If you were trying to get to a whole bunch of couples at the one time, where would you go?" she kinked an eyebrow. _

_"You see. That's why you should stay with us." Sam spoke as he stood up and reached for his jacket. "C'mon!" he gushed at them as the other two stood with blank expressions on their face. " We have costumes to get!" Sam snapped and tossed them their coats._

Dean sped furiously through the streets of this stupid little town in the Arkansas countryside. This was some mess. They had argued. Now he was going to find her with her throat slit. His grip tightened on the steering wheel and he gritted his teeth. This was wrong on so many levels. This had nothing to do with her. She didn't even believe!

Dean was shaking and Sam glanced across. If he didn't want to help now, what would happen when she was gone. He cast a sideward's glance at Dean, he wasn't thinking straight, Sam realised as he made a turn doing over ninety. He was suicidal and they didn't even know if she was dead yet. Sam swallowed the mountain of tears that threatened to engulf him as Dean pulled up outside the motel… 


	5. Tell Me Lies Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

The Impala screeched to an abrupt halt next to her '67 mustang. Dean threw the door open, slammed it shut. No apologies this time for hurting his girl. She'd understand. This was an emergency. Sam followed suit, drawing his gun as they approached the room. Dean opened it slowly but urgently at the same time.

They walked around the mini wall in the darkened room, her laptop giving the only light, dulcet tones of Chicago's "_I Don__'__t Wanna Live Without Your Love__"_playing into the open space. Dean glanced down at the bed where she was laying. Her throat was fine. Her eyes closed as if in sleep, her long legs spread out, she was on her stomach, she was never usually on her stomach.

Dean dropped to his knees beside the and lent on the mattress not wanting to waken her. He frowned when his elbow landed against something damp, warm, not really hot, just warm. He moved his elbow and wiped it. That's when he noticed it. He gazed at the sticky red substance on his fingers and practically _tasted_ the metallic scent of blood in the air.

"No." he gasped softly starling Sam. Dean rolled Naomi over on the bed gently and gasped as Sam recoiled in horror. There was a gash, about four inches deep through her abdomen. Hip to hip. And there was blood. Lots and lots of it. Her clothes were stained, the sheets and Dean was betting that the mattress was too. Sam grabbed for the door as Dean took her pulse. Faint. But there all the same.

He didn't need to ask Sam to do anything as he scooped her up into his arms and Sam raced to open the Impala's doors. As Sam fiddled with the trunk to find something that could be used to stem the bleeding Dean slipped into the back seat still clutching Naomi's body to him.

She felt so light; He noticed as he gazed down at her face. Sam lent in, handing Dean one of his t-shirts to put pressure on the wound. Naomi's eyes began to flutter and Dean fought the tears. She couldn't see him like this.

Her eyes weren't ocean blue anymore. They were pale, lifeless looking. Sam put the car into drive and sped out of the car park to hit the highway. "Hold on." Dean whispered to her knowing that the nearest hospital was over half an hour away and that _was_ speeding. Naomi opened her mouth to speak but nothing happened and Dean shifted her in his arms to hold the t-shirt more secure on the wound.

"Dean," half whisper, half gasp from her lips had Dean closing his eyes to hold back the tears. Her hand weakly sat on top of his and she smiled slowly. "Am…am I…De--"

"--shush sweetheart nothings going to happen to you. I wont let it I promise." he lied to her, to himself.

Naomi shook her head and Dean knew it wasn't going to work. "Don't Leave me." he whispered to her and she looked up at him. A look that asked how can I promise you that? What can I do? The lights began to dim in her eyes and he swallowed hard. "Sam hurry up!" he yelled and Naomi winced. "It's gonna be ok princess, I promise you." Dean repeated over and over again.

"Dean," she choked out. "You can't…say…don't promise…" her words were becoming less and less coherent. Sam revved up the Impala.

"Ten more minutes, I can't lose you too." he begged her, he couldn't it was true, his dad, then Sam, now her. No way.

"I…I want…you…to…not…to not hurt Dean." she gasped for air and he stroked her hair. There was nothing he could do, "I Might not…make--" Dean pressed his lips to hers.

"Don't say that." he half commanded, half begged. His tone cut through Sam. Dean was in pain. Sam couldn't take it. He never could. "You Want me to not hurt?" he looked down at her eyes, light still fading, and smiled. "you would do anything?" he was trying to keep her talking to him.

She nodded and Dean sighed. He was loosing her, she didn't have the energy to play ball with him but she was trying to cling onto life with as much grip as her current situation allowed her to. He kissed her again then whispered against her lips. "Then lie to me."


	6. The Only Thing Holding Me Together Is U

It was an after thought about how stupid it must have looked: Batman and Superman carrying in a woman with blood pouring from her abdomen. At least she had got changed, Dean thought as he paced the corridor. He hated hospitals. Really, really hated these places.

The coffee was hot as it burned a path down his throat. Sam had left half an hour ago. To get them clothes. Dean was holding her jewellery in his hand as though it was the only thing keeping her alive and if he let go, then so did she. She didn't wear much jewellery, her mother's engagement ring on a chain, a watch, a bracelet and a ring. That was all she ever wore, all of the time, she always said she felt underdressed without it.

Dean's head thumped off of the wall as he fought back the tears. He couldn't cry, not now. He had a new hunt, a new focus. No time for weakness. No time for chick flick moments. Had to find who ever did this to her. Or _what _ever did this to her.

He ran his hand over his face and took a deep breath. He looked at his watch. Three thirty. They had been here two hours. She had been in surgery for almost two hours. That's how bad it was. How deep the wound was. How much blood she had lost. "Dean?" Sam's massive hand was on his shoulder, offering comfort and support.

Sam crouched down in front of Dean, placing the bag between his feet. "How you holding up?" he asked gently knowing it was probably the most stupid question in the universe. Dean smiled,

"I'm not the one in surgery Sam." he spat and Sam smiled, patting him on the shoulder and stood up to take the seat next to Dean. "Sorry." It was no more than a whisper that left Sam confused.

"For what?" he asked still shocked by the statement.

"Snapping at you, screwing everything up as usual." Dean replied softly; his eyes looking up to meet with Sam's.

"Dean--" Sam began but was distracted when the doors swung open and Naomi was wheeled out of surgery as they took her away, probably to recovery or ICU. Sam smiled as a nurse, mid forties, a motherly type figure, made her way towards them.

"Miss Nichols is being taken to ICU just now, don't worry the surgery went just fine considering." The nurse smiled sweetly at them. "You can come and see her but she'll be out of commission for a while yet, she's gonna be a bit groggy from the anaesthetic and blood loss but she'll be as right as rain, providing she gets some good old TLC." the nurse smiled and gestured for them to follow her.

Dean brushed her hair away from her face, in all the ten years he had known her she had never been sick, not even the flu. He wasn't used to seeing her this pale. Sam had left again to go and call Bobby to get a lead on whatever this thing was.

Dean threaded his fingers through Naomi's as he watched her breathe. Her fingers grasped onto his and his eyes shot to hers. "Dean? DEAN!" her voice was throaty and desperate as she called for him. She tried to sit but pain shot through her body and she sobbed as she fell back onto the bed.

"Shhh. Mimi, it's ok. Hey. I'm here, I'm here. Right here." he whispered as he pushed himself up into the bed and cupped her jaw, while raising her hand to his lips and gently kissing her fingers. Naomi drew her legs up to her but Dean pressed against them. "No Naomi, don't do that, hang on and I'll get nurse." he smoothed her hair and tried to untangle his fingers from hers.

"Don't leave me Dean, please. It hurts, Dean please." she sobbed and he relented. He hated her tears. Hated the feeling of guilt that was currently pooling in his stomach. He wrapped his fingers around hers again and sighed,

"I wont." he rubbed his thumb back and forth over her hand and wiped her tears with his other hand. The sharp click of the door alerted Dean and he spun around, shielding her body with his.

The nurse simply smiled and Dean turned back around to Naomi. Her grip was vice like on his hand as the nurse asked her the routine questions and things before going to find a doctor to sign off on the increase of pain relief.

"What happened to Batman?" Naomi sighed and moved slightly on the bed, instantly regretting it, to make more room for Dean. Dean half grinned as though to please her and sighed.

"I'm sorry." he whispered, her brow furrowing in confusion, "For this, for everything." he sighed once more, his words barely audible. The nurse walked back into the room and changed the drip in the still silence of the room. The nurse shifted about uncomfortably before making a beeline for the door.

Naomi laughed slightly and Dean smiled softly. He never thought he'd hear that laugh again. Her eyes were back to their usual ocean blue/green colour and he sighed when she traced the line of his jaw with her soft, gentle hand. He smiled and leaned into her touch, placing a kiss in her palm.

"Dean," she whispered, he knew it was an order not a statement or a question. He let her go and moved to sit beside her properly and she snuggled into him her hand resting over his heart, her head nestled against his shoulder.

"I thought you were gonna leave me." he confessed, as he hugged her closer to him, mindful of her scar. Naomi looked up at him with tear filled eyes and he smiled down at her, cupping her cheek, preparing to wipe them away.

"I'm not gonna--" she started but Dean's lips on hers stooped the flow of words.

"Don't say that, please, not you, don't finish it." Naomi's eyes shot open at the pleading tone in his voice and one of those tears fell, right onto Dean's thumb and he wiped it away. "Everyone who says that to me, does," he confessed as he looked at his shirt, as if mesmerised by the pattern on it.

"Ok, Dean, I'm right here. Promise." she reassured him and he smiled. She tucked herself back into the position she was in before his starling confession, it didn't hurt as much in that position, but, then again, it stopped hurting when Dean took her into his arms back at the motel. She needed him to know she had forgiven him, couldn't bare to think that she had inflicted more pain on his already damaged -and sold- soul.

He threaded her fingers through his and he sighed, kissing her head again. This was as close to normal as he would ever get.

Sam clicked the cell shut. No demonic activity Bobby had told him but Sam knew different. The smell of sulphur was thick in the air, after Sam had managed to get rid of the metallic smell of blood. _That girl had to have some strength to hold on_ he thought as he ran searches on Demons and spirits to see if her MO matched any known Demon. "You wont find anything." A voice behind him said and he jumped, pistol in hand. He raised his eyes brows at the blonde in front of him.

"Who the hell are you? How did you get in here? What do you want?" he commanded and the blonde laughed.

"One question at a time Sammy." she laughed "I only want to help." she raised her hands up as if surrender. Sam looked shocked.

"how do you know who I am?" he barked

"Chill, everyone knows who you are since that brother of yours shot old yellow eyes." she whispered, "And I can help you with him you know." she cocked her head to the side.

"How exactly you gonna do that?" he asked nonchalantly. The girl closed her eyes and opened them as they flashed black.


	7. Secrets Told In Darknes Are Secrets Kept

Dean sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. This stupid book was getting him nowhere. It said the same stuff as all the other books and websites they had looked at. Naomi had tried to help but she couldn't remember much about that night. Little vague pieces of information would enter her head periodically but in the two weeks since it happened, all they got was it was a man, she had tried to fight him off, she had been attached to the ceiling until the impala appeared.

Then she would begin to cry and Dean would wrap his arms around her and gently kiss her, tell her everything was alright. Right now, she was curled up to him while he flicked through the book. Finding nothing. Her fingers gripped the front of his dark grey t-shirt a little tighter and her looked down at her.

Her eyes fluttered open and she smiled lazily at him like she always does. Her hand smoothed back and forward over his chest. She wasn't stupid. She could tell something other than the lack of information was bothering him. The way his brow set in that frown she always thought was endearing. "What's wrong Dean?" she asked sweetly sitting up, although never breaking eye contact. He smiled at her and sat the book down on the bed beside them.

"Nothing." he sighed and reached out for her. _Liar._ she thought but lent into him all the same. He was her weakness. Her challenge. Her safety. Her lover. Her best friend. Her _Dean_. She smiled into his shoulder. He never was one for words, he would rather smile or laugh or smirk or give you one of his stares.

"I'm not stupid. I'm here. Sammy's here. Everything is gonna be ok." she smiled again, her hand resumed its place on his chest , sure she _knew_ about the deal, but like Dean, she had accepted that there was nothing they could do about it.

"Never said you were and I know." the words came out rougher than he had intended. _defensive asshat._ she inwardly growled.

"Dean." she warned. She wasn't up for his games. She had watched him suffer for far too long, she couldn't do it any more. Ten years she had watched him take everything to heart with a smile. Blame everything on himself. Berate himself for failure.

"Naomi." he countered. He wasn't playing. He was hiding for his own personal reasons. Sanity she guessed.

"Talk to me?" she asked, she was going to demand it of him but then he really would have went on the defensive and all hell really would have broken loose in that dingy motel room in the middle of Louisiana where they had stopped for the night for the simple fact neither Dean or Naomi could drive any longer.

"Can't." Dean answered quickly.

"Can't meaning wont?" _Damn_ he thought. She was good at this.

"Can't meaning not physically possible." he sighed. And Naomi looked at him and what was it with people and _that _look. Dean looked away. Sammy had gotten his way far too many times with _that_ look; the pleading eyes, slightly jutted out bottom lip.

He could never say no to Sam and well Naomi, Naomi was a Daddies little girl through and through. What ever she wanted she got. Flashed that look and she had any guy doing what ever she wanted. That and the killer smile. Dean sighed and let his head thump off of the wall gently. "Where's Sam?" he asked and Naomi chuckled.

"As much as a protective brother you are Dean, I don't think this is what this is all about." she moved again and sat up taking his larger hand in-between her two smaller ones. Dean Winchester didn't do chick flick moments and Naomi knew that but sometimes you had to be as stubborn as he was to get him to open up to you.

Dean looked away and got up, Naomi tilted her head to one side as he walked over to the window and lent his forehead against it. Frowning slightly she followed, her arms wrapping around his rib cage, head resting against his shoulder.

"See that." he spoke and she could bet her bottom dollar he was pointing to the Impala. He lent back and she slipped under his raised arm._ Bingo._ She sighed and looked up in expectation of his next sentence. "She's all I'm leaving behind." he whispered sadly before letting the curtain fall again, hiding the Impala from them and them from her.

"Dean, that's not all--" he pressed his finger to her lips and she shut up, simply raising her eyes to meet his, shiny green unhidden, eyes. She stood on tiptoe to place a kiss to his lips. His game face was gone. There was just fear and hurt and pain and…love? Naomi looked at him confused and he smiled slightly.

Had he let his guard down totally? Usually he would half drop it around her, enough for her to get a glimpse of the vulnerable man beneath the bravado but not enough for her to comfort him.

He settled his hands on her hips and gazed down intently at her. Naomi suddenly felt very self-conscious and nervous. Slowly raising her eyes to meet his once again. Dean lowered his head down tracing a trail of kisses from her temple to her lips, staying there, teasing her, before carrying on his trail down her neck and across her collar bone.

Her hands ran up him smooth arms and across his shoulders, finally grasping onto his short brown hair. "Dean," she began but his lips on her silenced all thoughts and words that were about to spill from her lips. She knew what he was doing, distraction, it was all in his game.

She had come to learn it over the years and, damn her, he was good at it. She didn't want to push him away, didn't want to hurt him but the phrase "you have to be cruel to be kind" popped into her head. "Dean." She warned and pressed on hand firmly on his chest as the other curled around his bicep.

He looked at her then and she suddenly wished she had left it well alone. She knew he was vulnerable, but she had never seen anyone look so lost, so scared, so alone in her whole life. Her hand that was firmly on his chest had wrapped itself round his neck and she was cradling him close to her.

There was so much she wanted to say to him but there was just no words to say it. Naomi opened and closed her mouth a few times, no words would be pushed out and then she was left dumbfounded. Moisture. He muddled brain pointed out eventually. _Tears_ was her next rational thought. And they sure as hell weren't hers.

She slowly turned her head and pressed a kiss to his temple when his arms tightened around her waist, a silent request for her not to let go. She understood the fact that he didn't want her to see him like this, this open, this vulnerable. Her hand ran through his hair and she walked backwards to the bed, slowly sitting down and carefully moving back so she was in the middle of the bed and let him snuggle into her.

She was on her back, he was on his front, his arms still wrapped around her body and his face still cradled into her neck between her jaw and shoulder. Naomi lay there silently, every once in a while turning to place a kiss into his hair. Dean's silent tears began to subside and he removed his arms from round about her.

His face was so different than she was used to. A really sad smile, lost eyes and relaxed features. The innocence he usually only possessed when he slept or when he thought she was asleep. She reached up and cupped his stubbled cheek and he lent into her touch.

The door opened and Dean's head flew back down to the safe spot of her neck and Sam raised an eyebrow when he turned around from locking the door. "He was tired." Naomi offered and Sam shrugged. "How'd it go?" she asked and Sam flashed her a warning look. "So you didn't get chatted up by any blondes then? Brunettes maybe?" she licked her lips. Code. Sam thought and nodded,

"Nah, libraries aren't exactly a good place to meet many people." he joked as he moved to the bathroom and Naomi smirked inwardly. Ok so Sam had asked her to keep it a secret, but she couldn't just not tell Dean that Sam was accepting help from a demon, as loyal as she was, she was closer to Dean than Sam and if what Blondie had said was true, Dean deserved to know.

"What was that about?" Dean whispered and Naomi looked down at him.

"Sam was meeting some contact," she half-lied. Ok so maybe she wasn't going to tell Dean the whole truth. Not yet anyway.


	8. Spinning Around In Circles

Dean sighed over his coffee as he lent against the Impala, filling her with fuel. Placing the cup carefully on the roof he removed the nozzle and put it back into the pump. Sam smirked as he emerged from the store and threw the bar of chocolate at Dean, who caught it easily.

"You're Batman!" Sam saw the flash of pain in Dean's eyes and he smiled. "Could have been worse, you could have been Bat-_woman,_" Sam tried and Dean had to raise a smile at that.

"Where we headed?" Dean asked as he ripped into the chocolate's wrapper with his teeth.

"Eh, Lafayette Indiana." Sam mumbled as he folded his unnaturally long limbs into the car.

"Why? Gordon after you're ass again?" Dean asked and Sam smiled.

"Nope. But there is some pretty strange deaths there. Even for us. One guy walked into his neighbours house and slit the guys throat with a freaking c_hainsaw. _This woman killed her best friend over a hand bag. And there's this guy who'd you'd get on well with." Sam looked at Dean as he climbed into the car.

"Oh yeah?" Dean cocked an eyebrow.

"Can't keep his fly fastened," Sam flashed Dean a smirk and Dean feigned hurt.

"That cut deep man!" Dean mumbled around the chocolate bar gripped between his lips and teeth, Sam rolled his eyes as Dean pulled out of the gas station and up another long stretch of highway.

"Naomi not here?" Sam asked as he tossed his stuff on the motel bed.

"Nah, she's with her dad, safer there than here, besides the studio is falling apart without her, they need her." Dean smiled and closed the blinds.

"You ok with that? I mean I thought you said she was safer with you so you could protect her?" Sam asked softly as he set about salting the windows and doors.

"I have to be. I need her safe." Dean whispered and Sam knew what he meant. He would have done anything to have Jess safe and protected from that thing.

"Yeah, but she'll be coming out at some point right?" Sam asked. It felt weird without her there, Sam didn't realise how much he took her being there for granted.

"Maybe." Dean shrugged as he set about laying the salt lines. " so what have we got then?"

Dean tapped the Impala's steering wheel impatiently as Sam talked to the cashier about the attack on the woman. A sharp knock on the window made Dean jump and he turned around. "Bobby!" Dean growled as the older man laughed and got into the car.

"You should be paying attention." Bobby mocked as he fixed his tie in the rear view mirror.

"I was watching….Bobby where's Sam?" Dean panicked and leapt from the car only to crash into his 6 foot 4 little brother.

"Where's the fire?" Sam asked as Dean pulled him to his feet. Dean glared and shoved Sam into the car before snatching the keys.

"Sam You ever do that again and I swear I really will kill you." Dean growled as he put the impala into drive.

"So what did you find out?" Bobby asked, and Sam jumped, his head collided with the roof of the car and Dean couldn't help the laugh that escaped his mouth,

"Jesus Bobby!" Sam yelled as he cradled his head in his hand. Dean glanced at Sam and cleared his throat. Sam looked up eyes filled with tears and Dean's brow furrowed with concern. "I'm fine Dean." Sam said as he straightened and turned to Bobby. "We have people killing each other over hand bags… now I know girls are addicted to them but I've never know them to kill for one." Sam raised his eyebrows and Bobby tilted his head to the side.

"What else?" Bobby asked aware that Dean had sped up the impala.

"Eh, guy killed his neighbour with a chainsaw and we have a serial playboy in town." Sam winced when Dean hit a bump in the road.

"Yeah and he's driving like a maniac. Dean slow down!" Bobby commanded harshly.

"No." Sam rolled his eyes as Dean sped up even further, for once glad of his brother stubbornness.

They pulled up at the motel and Sam and Dean walked inside. Bobby had went to his truck to get the books that he needed from it.

Sam ran to the toilet and threw up as Dean closed the door.

"You ok?" He asked as he walked over to the bathroom door and opened it slightly.

"Yeah," Sam rasped even though he felt as though someone had smacked him over the head with a sledge hammer then proceeded to stomp on his brain. His eye sight was blurry and his neck was cramped.

"Try again." Dean's eyes were stuck on Sam and he reached for him and Sam grabbed his arm.

"It Hurts Dean." he half gasped/half sobbed. Dean fell to the floor and let Sam grip onto him burying his face into the leather jackets collar.

"Sam, stay with me." Dean commanded and Sam looked up at him. Dean disappeared and reappeared into Sam's rapidly failing vision. He was holding onto everything he could think of to keep himself awake. "Open your eyes Sam." Sam tried but it wasn't going to happen and he surrendered himself to the comforting darkness and failed to hear Dean's muffled pleas for help or feel the warm tears as they fell from Deans cheeks to his.


	9. And I Will Hold You In My Arms

Dean sat beside the bed and gripped Sam's hand. This was becoming far too familiar for Dean to cope with. He stared at Sam in the bed; he was pale, eyes closed, breathing shallow. What was wrong with him? Dean's head was spinning, he didn't hear the foot steps until arms wrapped around him and soft lips were placing a gentle kiss on his temple. He didn't look around. He couldn't. he was far to scared that something would happen to Sam if he took his eyes off of him.

A smooth cheek pressed against the rough stubble on his and he lent into it. "He's gonna be okay Dean." that soft comforting voice that had got him through everything and anything breathed softly into his ear. He reached up with his free hand and gripped the arms around his shoulders.

"Thank you Naomi." he whispered, not trusting his voice at this particular moment in time.

"I don't know what for but your welcome." Dean inhaled her as she tightened her grip on him and kissed his hair.

Normally he would have pushed her away but he was hurting too much not to let her try and stop it. The first salty tear slipped down his face and onto her bare wrist, then the second, then the third, until she was perched on his lap, smoothing his hair and whispering that everything was going to be okay.

Anyone could have walked by in that moment and he wouldn't have cared. They didn't know what was wrong with Sam. His brother was probably dying again and he couldn't do anything about it. She had nearly died. He was dying, Dean just wanted the pain to stop and the bad luck that followed him around like a bad smell to go away.

"Come on De, I'm right here I'm not going anywhere." Naomi tried, but she didn't know how to help him, she had never needed to. It was always the other way about. Dean's grip tightened on her and she kissed his head again.

There was a sharp knock at the door. Followed by footsteps, too heavy to be a doctor but too light to be anything dangerous, Naomi hoped. "Hey Bobby." she breathed and Dean looked around.

Bobby seemed slightly startled at the red eyes and wet face that greeted him when Dean turned his head. "Why don't you take him back to the motel?" Bobby whispered to Naomi and she nodded.

She kissed Dean's head and moved to stand only to have him pulled her back down and bury his face into the crook of her neck. "Come on Dean, lets go back to the motel huh? Bobby will stay with Sam and call us if anything changes." she ran her fingers through his hair and he sighed.

He really didn't want to leave Sam here but there was nothing he could do and nothing they could do for him. Words failed him at this point and he didn't trust his voice so he merely nodded and got up never letting go of her.

Naomi pushed open the door of her motel room and sighed as she walked into the room, Dean closely behind her as he gripped her hand as thought she was the only thing keeping him alive. "Come here," she sighed as she turned around tossing the keys onto the table and holding her arms out to him.

"I need you," he whispered as he stepped to her and pulled her close to him. Dean was startled that he has admitted it out loud but he figured that she would have guessed already. She wasn't stupid.

"Right here Dean, Always gonna be okay?" she whispered against his neck in the still, thick air of the motel room. His arms tightened around her as he walked backwards towards the bed; he didn't have enough strength to keep them both standing and he wasn't sure she could take his weight.

Naomi carded her fingers though Dean's hair as he settled against her as they lent on the headboard. The T.V cast shadows around the room as Naomi absent mindedly ran her hand over Dean's arm. A light rapping at the door caused Dean's brow to furrow and his hand to slip under the pillow to retrieve the hand gun that was there.

Walking slowly over to the door and putting the chain on, Dean cast a few glances back at Naomi who rose from the bed and walked towards him grabbing the keys from the table. Dean pushed her behind him and slipped the key that she handed him into the lock.

The blonde Stood impatiently outside the door and rolled her eyes when Dean peeked around. "Dean, Lemmie in." She spat and Dean kinked an eyebrow.

"Who are you and how do you know who I am?" Dean asked curiously eyeing the blonde.

"You and Sam really are brothers aren't you? Now let me in." She said as she stepped forward. Naomi stepped back from the door and tugged Dean with her, before closing the door and sliding open the chain.

The blonde smirked as she entered the room and Dean glared at Naomi who smiled. "What do you want Ruby?" She asked and Dean's eyebrows rose.

"Oh, Good guess, so you're the princess Sam was talking about?" Ruby smirked.

"Last time before I fry you're demonic ass." she whispered praying that it was Demons who went up in smoke when they were attacked with holy water.

"Oh hark at Miss Prim-and-Proper's knowledge of demons, very impressive." Ruby smirked and Naomi looked at Dean who picked up the bottle of holy water.

"Now, Now don't be so hasty. I know about Sam and I know what's wrong with him." Ruby held her hands up.

"Yeah severe concussion from hitting his head on the roof." Naomi countered and Dean unscrewed the cap and tilted his hand slightly.

"You are joking, Sweetheart, it's concussion he has," Naomi and Dean exchanged glances. "Try Demonic Induced Virus."


	10. Dirty Little Secret

A/N: This is such an awsome song by Sarah McLaughlin (That I Dont Own!), Called "Dirty Little Secrect" I reccomend you listen to it as you read this chapter but, you obviously dont have to!

Also, Reviews are Great so a review would be nice

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_If I had the chance, love  
I would not hesitate  
To tell you all the things I never said before  
Don't tell me it's too late_

"Are We gonna argue about this all day?" Dean yelled at Bobby as Bobby paced the floor by Sam's bed. Naomi was holding Sam's hand and willing the kid just to wake up.

"Dean, there's only one way to break and that's to find the demon that-" Bobby looked at the bed and Naomi slammed the button on the wall as she pulled the pillows away from behind Sam and collapsed the back of the bed. She wasn't a trained medical expert but she had did this so many times for her mother it felt like she was. Bobby grabbed hold of Dean and pulled him back out of the way as the nurses and doctors filed into the room with the crash unit.

"No." Dean whispered softly and Naomi joined them at the far side of the room. She pushed in between Dean's body and Bobby's, wrapping her arms around Dean, protecting him, preventing him form seeing what she already knew.

_Cause I've relied on my illusions  
To keep me warm at night  
But I denied in my capacity to love  
I am willing, to give up this fight_

Dean rested his head against Sam's hand that was clasped tightly between his. He wasn't hiding his tears anymore. He couldn't. twice. Twice had he failed Sam. He had let his Sammy down twice and there was no getting him back this time.

Naomi watched Dean break from the door way. There was nothing she could do, she didn't know how to fix it this time. The last time, when there was a way out, she had been able to hold him and whisper nice things into his ear, promise him that it would be alright; what had become of her promises now?

Bobby glanced through the window at the broken figure next to the bed and the lost looking one at the doorway. She wasn't the strong looking woman that he had met back at the scrap yard all those years ago, she didn't have the same sparkle to her. Bobby knew that she would do her best in whatever Dean needed her to do. Movement caught Bobby's eye and he watched her as she walked over towards the bed. Bobby was amazed that she had left it the two hours but as she approached the bed Bobby had a fleeting thought that maybe she had left it too long to comfort him.

Dean's body tensed when he heard the footsteps but relaxed when he saw the ringed finger on the hand that placed itself on his shoulder. He daren't look away from Sammy, his body wouldn't allow such a movement.

Naomi lowered her head to his and kissed his temple gently, she didn't speak, she didn't want to; she didn't want to make the same mistake of telling Dean that everything would be alright again. She carefully wrapped her arms around his chest as she crouched beside the chair; he had to know he wasn't alone in this cruel world, he had to know that she was there with him and she would never leave him.

Bobby walked into the room followed by the doctor and nodded at Naomi, she was probably the best one to tell Dean something like this, she would be able to keep him calm and help him keep his emotions in check while they were here.

"Dean," Naomi spoke softly, her lips millimetres from his ear, "We have to go now, they have to run some tests on Sammy, You think you can let them do that?" she asked gently, grabbing him and hauling his ass out of that room was plan C, this was only Plan A.

Dean shook his head and Naomi mentally kicked him _Plan B_...

"Dean, sweetheart, it's their job. We have to let them do it. I'm asking you to come into the corridor with me and Bobby just now. Then you can come in and see Sammy again." she tried and Dean dropped Sam's hand and got up, almost sending Naomi on her ass.

Dean pushed by Bobby and walked out of the door and kept walking. He didn't know where he was going all he knew was that he couldn't stay here, not right now.

_I've been up all night drinking  
To drown my sorrow down  
Nothing seems to help me since you went away  
I'm so tired of this town  
Where every tongue is wagging  
When every back is turned  
Their telling secrets that should never be revealed  
There's nothing to be gained from this_

Naomi drove around the streets and bars in the town looking for him. He had to be there somewhere. This had to be the hundredth street she had been down and she had given up hope of finding him. His cell was off and so was his control. She hadn't given up on him, she just needed to regather and re-group so she turned the cara around and headed for the motel.

She wiped the tears form her eyes as she pulled up outside the motel room and cursed softly when she seen the Impala sitting askew outside their room door.

Scrambling from the car, she didn't know whether to be relieved or incredibly angry at Dean. Any anger, however, dissipated when she pushed open the motel room door and caught sight of him sitting on the floor, his back against the bottom of the bed; Sam's belongings scattered around him. She didn't make a sound as she closed the door and walked uneasily across the room.

Dean's gaze moved from Sam's knife that he had clutched in his hand up and onto Naomi's tear stained face. Somewhere inside him Dean felt a sharp pang of guilt knowing that it was probably him who had caused those tear tracks but when he blinked they were gone, only love and admiration flashed across her features. He didn't need sympathy so he knew that it wouldn't be there.

Crouching down slowly, Naomi smiled at him. She didn't want to reach for him right now, Dean liked his space, his privacy even from her and imposing on a grieving Winchesters probably wasn't the best thing a person could ever do.

Dean looked at her again and showed her the knife he was holding. "I gave that to Sammy for his graduation." Dean announced proudly, as he tossed the knife in his hand. Naomi smiled at him again and Dean watched as her eyes filled with tears. She tilted her head to the side and Dean swallowed. " It wasn't enough though was it?" he asked, his voice barely audible.

"Dean, You did that kid proud." Naomi said evenly as she sat next to Dean with her back against the bottom of the bed. Dean smiled,

"Proud isn't good enough Mimi. Safe is okay but _Alive_ is so much better, one simple job and I couldn't do that properly." Dean let the tears fall freely from his crowded eyes and Naomi pulled her legs up to her chest.

"You know, a few years ago, this guy said to me after my mother died that, your best is always good enough and hardships are thrown in you're way to see how strong you actually are." She risked a side wards glance at Dean and let out a breath when a smile lit up his eyes.

"I actually said to see what you're made of but same difference." he whispered and they both laughed slightly. Naomi's hand hung limply between them, still unsure of whether or not to reach for him. She didn't have to worry though as Dean reached for her, his lips pressing firmly against hers as his hands busied themselves with removing the many layers of clothing that only an Eskimo could wear.

Naomi gasped against his lips as Dean decided just to rip open her tops rather than fighting with the fabric to get them over her head. Dean's hands were tearing at her jeans before Naomi could mourn the loss of her shirts.

* * *

Naomi snuggled up against Dean in the mess of clothes, sheets and sweat and breathed deeply. Her hand smoothed the vast expanse of Dean's tanned chest and was giving into the pull of sleep when she felt hot tears fun down her forehead and down the side of Dean's cheek.

Her man was broken and she knew she definitely couldn't fix it this time. Dean was hiding his emotions from _her_. She wanted to cry for Sammy, to cry for Dean but she knew he had to be strong for both of them now and even if Dean had resigned himself to the fate of having lost Sammy and Being alone in the world she hadn't. Dean wasn't alone he still had his family. He still had her and most importantly; she now thought she had a way to help him, all she had to do was track that blonde bitch down and lie through her teeth.

_Oh, I am willing to give up this fight.._


	11. Conversations

**Okay, this is rather smoochy and I'm not too sure how i feel about it kinda hit a bit of a wall but everything should be a bit better after this chapter and could possibly be finished over the next few days, i'm not exactly happy with this fic and i may leave it all together. reviews are appriciated either way **

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Naomi watched Dean as he slept; curled in on himself, face hidden from hers, he had been having nightmares, watching Sammy die over and over again. Naomi hadn't slept much since that night. All she could think about was trying to fix Dean, to un-break him. She hugged her legs closer to her chest and puffed out a breath, sending her fringe to join the rest the mess of hair. Resting her chin on her knees her fingers traced the same path that was forced upon her fringe moments before.

Dean stirred and Naomi took a deep breath, a deep, steady breath to get her game face on for Dean. "What you doing still awake?" he asked softly sitting up and looking at her, huddled up into herself in the middle of the bed.

"Couldn't sleep, didn't want to wake you." she said truthfully. Dean just smirked and reached out a hand and cupped her jaw, stroking her cheek before pulling her into him.

Naomi went with him and curled up against his side, her head resting on his shoulder. "What's wrong Mimi?" he whispered all the while staring at the ceiling.

"Nothing." she lied and lent up off of him to look him in the eyes to prove her point.

"You would tell me if there was though wouldn't you?" his eyes bared raw emotion and she hated it, he was so unsure of himself, so lost.

"of course I would!" she half exclaimed, startling them both, her voice was cracking with the effort it took to keep herself relaxed, to keep herself together but it wasn't enough as one more look into the endless depths of Dean's tear filled green eyes had Naomi spiralling into a dark abyss of sorrow that she had spent the best part of three days pulling Dean from.

When Naomi awoke the bed beside her was cold and the slight dip in the pillow where his head would have been was already back to normal. Sitting up slowly, her eyes searching the room for signs of danger or a note; seeing signs of neither and her brow wrinkled in confusion and worry.

The door swung open and Naomi breathed a sigh of relief, Dean smirked in her direction and held up two cups of coffee and a bag of donuts, as if reading her mind. Pulling on the t-shirt he had worn the night before she padded over the room to the table where he was sitting.

Dean gazed up and tilted his head towards her, gently touching her lips with his before she finally opened up to him and cupped his face in her hands. When they pulled back Dean rested his forehead against hers and ran his fingers through her hair. "It's getting long," he remarked, pulling her into his lap.

"I know, have to get it cut again, its being a bitch to style in the morning." she replied running her fingers through the now almost shoulder length front of the pixie style hair cut.

"I like it," Dean mumbled around the donut he was currently chewing on, Naomi kinked her eyebrow and took a bite out of the other side; chewing happily as Dean cursed her around his own mouthful.

Glancing at the coffee cup and back at Dean, Naomi waited until he had finished to give her coffee and found herself blushing when he watched her take a sip, "What?" she asked nervously, a small giggle making its way out of her mouth. Dean smirked and took the coffee off of her.

"You know I don't say it much and I'm sorry for that, but I love you, you came into my life all those years ago and really made a difference. You may not think you did but trust me, if you weren't here right now? I wouldn't be either. I have one regret in life when it comes to this stuff and that's not saying all this sooner and settling down with you and having a family."

Naomi blinked a few times, unsure of what to say to that. Dean wasn't one to talk about how he was feeling so this admission was something to be admired. A small smile graced her features and she leant in and kissed him soundly.

"Dean, I--" Naomi was cut off when the door rattled and looked at Dean who rubbed her thighs apologetically and she stood.

"Tell me later?" he said as he opened the door and the woman hugged him fiercely.

"What are you doing here?" he asked s little shocked and angry when he pulled back.

"I called her." Naomi smiled and Dean raised an eyebrow…


	12. Staring Down The Barrel Of A Loaded Gun

Dean looked from woman to woman, unaware of the severity of the current situation he was in. "Someone going to tell me what's going on?" Dean asked, his cool, calm, confused look disappearing to be replaced with one of frustration and anger.

"She called me." The other woman gestured to Naomi who was backing up towards the table,

"Yeah I got that much," Dean's voice oozed danger and his gaze fell to Naomi. "Mimi?" the simple one word question to her was as effective as shooting a Vampire. "Naomi!" he barked and she spun around, Colt in hand and pointed it at the other woman.

"Woah!" the blonde held her hands in front of her, "If I woulda known you wanted me her to kill me then I wouldn't have came." she spoke evenly and Dean could have swore he saw fear there.

"I don't want to kill you but if I have to then so be it," Naomi shrugged nonchalantly, trying to hide her tremble from Dean and the blonde currently backed against the wall.

"What do you want then?" Dean asked bemused and slowly making a move towards Naomi who picked up Sam's pistol and pointed it at Dean.

"don't, move." She commanded and Dean's eyebrows shot up.

"Naomi, what's going on?" he asked softly, she was never the psycho of they're relationship,

that was his job but right now she had a gun on him and one on Ruby.

"You, bitch, are gonna fix this mess." she smiled smugly and Ruby raised an eyebrow

"And how do you propose I do that brain-box?" she snapped and Dean turned his head, to look at her and flashed her a what the fuck are you doing?! Look before turning back to Naomi.

"I know what you can do, I know who you work for," Naomi said evenly coking the Colt and licking her lips. Ruby's eyes flashed black.

"then you'll know I can do this," she said and flicked her head to the side, anxious when nothing happened and Naomi's smirk widened.

"You know I may not be a hunter, but I'm far from stupid, I have this planned remember, everyone is exactly where I want them to be." Naomi said and walked backwards towards the bed and sat down, her legs curled under her. Ruby and Dean's eyes frantically searched the room and Dean had to smile when he saw the huge devils trap drawn on the ceiling, everything was perfect.

"Naomi, come on babe and tell me what's going on huh?" Dean pleaded moving slightly from near Ruby to nearer the bed where Naomi was.

"She can fix this Dean." Naomi repeated and Dean closed the gap between them, seriously worrying about her sanity.

"Why don't you tell Dean the truth about how you know all this eh?" Ruby goaded rising to her feet to stand firm against the invisible restraints.

"We'll get to that." Naomi said firmly rising to her feet and accepting the challenge that Ruby placed in front of her. "But right now? You are going to get Sam out of that morgue and back here with us alive." Naomi smirked and Ruby sat down.

"I ask again, how am I supposed to do that?" she looked deep into Naomi's eyes and grinned.

"Well, seeing as you work for the bitch that's after Sam? You can bring him back, I'm not asking you to I'm telling you." Naomi was deadly serious in this command and Dean's mouth fell open in shock.

"And you know all this because?" Ruby asked rising to her feet.

"You're not the only well connected one, that's why now are you gonna help or what?" Naomi tilted her head to the side.

"Didn't realise I had a choice in the matter," the sarcasm dripped from Ruby's voice,

"Oh you don't have a choice per say, You do it or you die?" Naomi snarled and cocked both gun.

"You wouldn't." Ruby teased and Naomi raised her eyebrow, and Dean dived for her as a deafening shot rang out…


	13. Aftermath

**A/N: so sorry i've not updated this in a wee while, doing my exams and stuff, iwanna say thanks for the feed back and adds i've ben getting and I want ou to know that this is all for u guys **

**so we left off at the shot ringing out and the unanswered questions and ive left one of them so blindngly obvios i may acutally cry if you guys dont get it! haha. **

**so we're about to start on the climb to the top and i hope fingers crossed that the plan i have in mind wont dissapoint u lot!**

**enjoy!**

Dean fell to the floor clutching Naomi to him as both guns fell out of her hand landing with a clunk at Dean's knees. Her hand grasped at his shirt tightly and he looked around behind him to see a rather startled Ruby looking at the side of her jacket pinned to the wall by the shot Naomi had fired.

"You need to get you're bitch under control," Ruby snarled pulling on her jacket to free it.

"You need to shut you're mouth!" Dean snapped and pulled Naomi's head back to look in her shocked eyes.

Picking her up and placing her on the bed, Dean made his way over to the devils trap where Ruby stood and raised his eyebrows at the blonde before him. "There's two ways to do this." Dean said smoothly, the smirk in place but the dark, feral look in his eyes told Ruby he meant business. "My way or the other way." he smirked again and Ruby raised her eyes to meet his.

"You're way? Hm. What's the other way?" Ruby smirked up at him and Dean grinned back before punching her.

"You see," he spat as he looked at the blonde on the floor, "the best thing about these things is I can kick the crap outta you but you can't touch me." he smiled and walked away.

"You don't even know anything Dean! You don't know what Princess was talking about!" Ruby yelled and Dean spun around.

In two steps he was back in Ruby's face close enough to feel her breath hot and sticky on his lips. "and are you gonna tell me what that is sweetheart?" he goaded and she glared.

"No, Why don't you ask her?"

"Because I'm asking you." he snarled and Ruby suddenly felt very afraid of him.

"You know I'd take her to the hospital If I were you." Ruby smirked at Dean and he tilted his head to the side,

"Why?"

"You don't know?"

"Obviously not."

"then its not my place to say." Ruby smiled and shrugged as Dean grabbed for the holy water. "WAIT!" she yelled, her hands held out in front of her. With a glance at the bed she looked at Dean, "Don't shoot the messenger." Ruby whispered with sincerity.

The street lights blurred into one as the rain pelted off of the Impala as though it was trying to break in. Dean has been driving in circles for the past few hours, since dropping Naomi off at the hospital, He didn't stay. He couldn't stay. He had called Ellen to come over after hearing she was in the next town over and had dropped her off at the hospital too. He didn't want Naomi to be alone even though he couldn't sit with her. The feelings of betrayal and hurt seemed to be trying to drown him lately, and somewhere deep inside he wasn't sure if he was able to swim anymore. Was he that much of a horrible person she couldn't come to him and tell him herself? Was she that afraid that he would walk away from her if she did? There was more questions than there were answers and Dean wasn't particularly sure he wanted some of the questions answered. After everything they had been through together, she couldn't tell him this. She always told him stupid little things about her day and who was saying what, she told him anything but she couldn't tell him _this_. The one thing he should know she couldn't tell him.

The sound of "sweet child of mine" filled the empty silence of the Impala and the corner of Dean's mouth curved into a smirk before he debated whether or not to answer. Sucking in a breathe he picked up the phone and flipped it open.

"Hey Dean it's Ellen. " Dean let out a relieved sigh at the older woman's voice.

"hey Ellen."

"Look as much as you hate her right now I think she needs you here. Not me."

Dean sighed into the receiver. "I don't hate her Ellen, that's the point, I can be who she needs me to be right now."

"Oh for god's sake Dean stop being an ass and be a man Dean. She needs you and she's pretending she doesn't."

"Maybe she doesn't Ellen ever think of that?"

"Dean, she may make out she's this invincible superhero but she's so much more vulnerable underneath and right now she's scared Dean." Ellen finished on a sigh.

"Is she okay?" Dean all but shouted down the 'phone.

"Yes Everything's okay, well so far so good anyway. They're just running extra tests on her and want to keep her in overnight, she's in shock Dean. She keeps apologising and I don't know what to do to help her." Ellen rubbed a hand over her eyes and leant against the wall outside of the hospital. She had told Naomi she needed to get something to drink.

"Okay." Dean whispered into the phone and Ellen sighed.

"She doesn't know I'm calling you so she want know if you turn up or not." Ellen stood from the wall. "and for the record Dean? You're not the horrible person you think she thinks you are. You're name is the only other word apart from Sorry she's been saying."

Ellen heard the phone click shut and knew he'd be there soon. He wasn't the big bad Dean hunter that he made himself out to be he needed Naomi and Naomi needed him. Ellen sighed and turned to make her way into the hospital again and smiled at the middle-aged woman with a baby in her arms being greeted by her husband and Ellen felt a pang of worry. Bobby had told her about Dean's deal in the hope she would know or hear about some way out of it and couldn't help but let her thoughts drift to Dean and Naomi; after everything they had been through would Dean be around for anything like that? Would Naomi for that matter? So everything wasn't all that okay. Naomi wasn't dying or anything like that but Ellen was rather relieved that she had been brought in. high blood pressure and a chest infection that could have turned into pneumonia that she didn't even know she had.

"Ellen?" Naomi asked and smiled.

"Oh hey sweetheart." Ellen smiled back.

"They're getting me pain relief and making me stay in over night," Naomi looked embarrassedly at the floor and Ellen lent forward to tip her chin up.

"nothing wrong with that sweetheart, maybe a rest is what you need." Ellen's motherly tone had tears shining in Naomi's eyes. "Oh honey." Ellen half laughed and pulled Naomi into a hug.

"I've messed it up this time Ellen." she sobbed into Ellen's neck and Ellen stroked her hair.

"no you haven't sweetie, come on back to bed huh?" Ellen kissed her head lightly and Naomi nodded, walking after her into the room.

Dean pulled up outside the hospital and found a parking place. He wasn't sure why he was here or what he was going to say but he had a gut feeling he had to be here, for her. He strode up to the desk, his cocky façade intact as he approached the woman at the desk.

"Hi, I'm looking for Naomi Nichols." he smiled and tapped his fingers on the desk. The woman looked up and smiled at him and typed the name into the computer.

"she's in ward 40." the woman smiled and Dean smiled before half racing for the stairs.

Ellen sat on the side of Naomi's bed as she lent on her side against the pillow.

"I've really hurt him this time Ellen. Out of all the things I could have done and all the times I could have done it? I pick this and now. He needs me and I've just let the bomb blow up." she sighed and wiped at her eyes furiously to get rid of the tears.

"Takes more than a bomb to destroy a Winchester." Dean smirked from the doorway and Naomi's whole body jumped.

"D-Dean? What are you doing here?" she stumbled over the words and looked at the floor. Dean sighed and made his way over to her and Ellen got up.

"I'm gonna go get coffee." she whispered and made a subtle break for the door.

" I'm sorry." Naomi gushed the moment Dean's arms where around her and he laughed into her hair.

"Hey, Mimi, don't worry about it angel, I promise you that it's going to be okay." Dean soothed as he gently rocked back and forward.

"I'm so sorry." Naomi repeated and sobbed harder against him and Dean couldn't help the small tear that escaped and landed in her hair.

"I know baby, I know, look its okay We're get through this together." Dean sighed and slipped the ring off of his finger and onto hers.

"Dean, what….I…" Naomi stuttered and Dean pulled her back and kissed her soundly on the lips.

"I think Naomi Winchester has a ring to it." Dean smirked and Naomi giggled,

"Oh I know, you've made sure of that." she cupped his jaw with her right hand as she held her left hand up. Dean smiled back and linked his fingers with hers and kissed her passionately.

"Am I interrupting something?" a familiar voice from behind them cause them to stop and turn around.

"Sam?" they asked in unison and the figure in the doorway smiled.

**Ohhhhh So babys back huh? did Ruby come through? or was it someone else? and how did Naomi know all about Ruby? i hope u guys have the nex big secrect, its like the worst kept one in Hollywood!**

**well, i'll let u hit that little button now and tell me what you all think? reviews in exchange of another chapter? I think thats fair dont you?**

**Love you**

**K **

**xox**


	14. heres a toast

**A/N: **hey guys! i am so so sorry that i havent updated in over a month ! i'm just kinda draggin this one out if i'm honest lol. so yeah, it should be over in the next couple of weeks! I know! but this is the set up chapter, just to gain momentum to get this show on the road, not much soppiness in this chpater but i am enlisting the help of a very special annoying, "hurry up and get me a chapter" ex-bitch-turned-soppy-fluffy-bunny to make all you girls hearts break!

So anything you think mite happen? Anything you wanna see? give me a review you know you want to!

Love you all!

K

xox

* * *

Here's a toast, to the enemies we love the most.

"A demonic virus?" Sam asked bemused and Dean nodded. "So I've died twice? Who brought me back this time like you two looked like two horny teenagers caught in the act and I should know!" Nomi blushed furiously and Dean laughed.

"Yes, Sammy You should."

"So who was it?"

"Hmm?"

"That brought me back?" Sam asked again.

"Ruby I guess," Naomi shrugged and Dean nodded.

"How?" Sam cocked his eyebrow and Dean looked at Naomi.

"I asked her nicely?" Naomi shrugged and the colour drained slightly from Dean's face.

"You?" Sam looked as though someone had shot him.

"Yes."

"Why?"

Naomi looked baffled. "Why?" she repeated and Sam nodded. "Cause I wanted you back in our lives? I wanted our kid to know it's uncle, and if we cant save Dean I want our baby to be able to come to you and here what a hero it's dad is from someone other than me."

Dean sat on the bed motionless, the word "hero" dancing about his head like a ballerina on ice. "Hero." he repeats into the empty silence and Naomi turned to face him,

"yes Dean, Hero," she smiles that dazzling smile and he felt the same feeling he felt all those years ago when they were snuggled up under that tartan blanket in her apartment. Dean smiled slowly and Naomi lent forward and captured his lips in a soft kiss.

Sam clenched his jaw hard to stop the tears he felt stinging his eyes. "you're going to be a dad Dean." Sam smiled and barked out a laugh as he wiped his eyes with sleeve. Naomi smiled and lent over to Sam and gave him a kiss on the head before leaning back onto the pillows.

"You two better go and get some sleep." Naomi rubbed her eyes and yawned as Sam nodded and made to stand but Dean stayed put. "Dean?" Naomi asked as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I think I'll stay here." he smiled weakly and Sam's brow furrowed in confusion.

"Dean?" he asked softly and padded back over to the bed and sat down, "what's the problem?"

"nothing."

"Dean"

"I just…"

"Dean?" Naomi asked and gently cupped his face in her hands forcing him to look her in the eye.

"Ward 4." he whispered accepting defeat.

"What about it?" Naomi asked gently

"Death." Sam said quietly and Naomi looked up at him.

"I'm not gonna die."

"And I'm not gonna take the chance." Dean leant back from her and stretched.

"dean, go. I'll be fine" Naomi said again and held her hand out for Dean. "Besides you two have a week to catch up on." she playfully nudged Dean, his ring slipping up and down her finger.

"Sam?!" came the startled gasp from the doorway.

"Hey Ellen." Naomi smiled around Sam who turned around and nodded.

"Oh God." The colour drained from Ellen's face and Naomi looked at Dean.

"Chair." she whispered faintly and Dean grabbed the chair before walking Ellen over to it.

"You okay?" Naomi asked and help out a glass of water for Ellen who simply nodded never taking her eyes from Sam.

"Who made the deal this time?" Ellen asked eventually causing all three people to look at her. "please tell me you we're so stupid." Ellen looked at Naomi who had resorted to playing with the ring on her left hand. "You have a kid to think about and…..you have got to be kidding me!" Ellen exclaimed, forcing Naomi to look up at her. "You got engaged." Ellen whispered sadly and Naomi nodded, suddenly feeling very tearful.

"I didn't make any deals." Naomi looked back to the ring on her finger.

"What happened then?"

"I made a suggestion?" Naomi suggested and leant back into the pillows, Ellen smiled softly and leant over to push her hair from her eyes.

"you boys look beat to hell, you should go rest I'll stay with her." Ellen smiled at them and the boys exchanged looks.

"Okay, but call me." Dean stated as he stood up and straightened, "Love you." he whispered into her hair before kissing her soundly and making his way out of the door, surprisingly comfort at the soft sound of Sam's foot steps behind him.

"I dunno Sam, I have this sick feeling we shouldn't have left them there." Dean mused and before Sam could protest the Impala had done a 360° turn and was heading back to the hospital and his brother's -hopefully- annoying case of Paranoia.

Ellen stroked Naomi's hair as she drifted off into sleep, Ellen watched her breathing and her heart monitor that they had hooked her up to shortly after dean had left.

"I'm just here to check miss Nichols' vitals" the nurse smiled as she opened the door and walked curtly to the bed. Ellen smiled but couldn't ignore the felling in her gut that something was wrong, where had the nurse come from in this deserted ward? Ellen was far from stupid, her coffee break had turned into so much more and as she stood watching the older nurse take Naomi's pulse even though all she had to do was look at the screen screamed out to Ellen that this was it, this was what Bobby had warned her about.

Sam and Dean heard a loud crash as they entered the ward and began to run, reaching Naomi's bed just in time to see Ellen thrown across the room and of off a wall.

"Ellen!" they both yelled simultaneously and ran towards her. Dean felt more than heard Naomi's pained scream as she was pushed up against the wall, the nurses grip tight around her throat, her lips already beginning to tinge blue. Dean began to shake there was no way he could shoot the nurse without killing Naomi in the process and well that just wasn't an option.

Dean gazed up and Naomi's eyes met his: desperately pleading for him to help her but all too soon the force was gone and the nurse was bursting into a pile of flames.

"Naomi." Dean ran over and gathered her sobbing form into his arms.

"no need to thank me Winchester, I coulda left her ass for dead." A voice perked from the back group and Dean turned around.

"Ruby, em…" but his words were cut off with her startled intake of breath.

"Sam?" she choked out and he turned away from Ellen to face her.

"but I thought?" Naomi rubbed at her eyes and Ruby shook her head, fear evident in her face.

"Well if you didn't, who did?"


	15. Hold Me Close And Rid Me Of My Ghosts

**A/N:** Okay so after my DUNDUNDUN! moment i thought i should break you're hearts with soppiness and seeing as my orginal plan didnt work out i know i am going to make one reader (at least one) happy with me. well hopefully. anyways, i went soppy and if you guy think that this is bad, what i have planne is worse. so this could be wrapped up next week ' but dont worry i'm not ready to give up on this yet! this will go out on a memorable note.

Love y'all

K

xox

* * *

Hold Me Close And Rid Me Of My Ghosts.

Sam felt weird driving the impala back to the motel and even weirder when he found that he could remember the way. He has been dead for just under a week. But it just felt like he been asleep for days. Turning the corner at their motel, Sam smiled when he saw Naomi's black mustang parked proudly outside the room door. He was amazed by how much comfort the sight of a rain soaked car could actually bring him. Pulling up next to it and killing the engine Sam inhaled deeply. The scent of leather and aftershave and roses filled his senses; nothing to most people but home to him. The leather interior of the Impala, the comforting scent of his brothers aftershave and the smell of roses that followed Naomi where ever she went. Sam exhaled on a smile and threw open the door, climbing out into the cool, wet night air and leant against the closed door. Something about being here felt wrong, and not the "I don't belong here" wrong, Sam had a bad feeling that something was seriously not as it should be.

Sam pulled out his gun from the waistband of his trousers and stalked to the door, unlocking it and pushing it open. Sam's eyes darted around the vaguely lit motel room and came to rest on the figure standing at the window at the opposite end of the room.

"Hey!" Sam called, finger resting lightly against the trigger.

"hey Sammy." the figure turned around and Sam barely concealed his gasp.

"Wha-- I don't…" Sam trailed and the other figure smiled against the neon light.

"it's okay sweetie," the figure soothed as it moved towards him and Sam backed up.

"This isn't… you're not…" Sam blinked again, words were failing him, but then again his eyes had to be too, this couldn't be….

"She is." came voice from the darkened motel bathroom and Sam's eyes darted to meet the shining black ones of the stranger. Sam blinked again and tried to calm his breathing, his heart rate quickening too. "Calm down Sammy." the demon whispered as she made her way towards him.

"I don't…" Sam was cut off as the first figure softly pressed her lips to his.

"She's a peace offering of sorts." the demon stated and walked over to the light switch. Sam blinked a few times when the woman backed off and he leant against the wall for support.

" A peace offering?" Sam managed out and the demon nodded.

"I want Lilith dead." she stated as she made her way to the bed, and sat with her legs in a basket. "I want you to rule hell Sam and seeing as you're dead…" she shrugged and Sam's mouth fell open slightly.

"No I'm not. I'm alive." Sam pointed out and she smiled sadly.

"No Sam, You're not."

"Well how am I breathing air huh? How can I possibly feel things if I'm dead?" he spat out and the Demon stood up and took his hand.

"Can u feel that?" she asked and he looked at her bemused and looked down at his hand to see or feel nothing, the softness where her hand had been vanished and he looked at her,

"Feel what?" he asked her and she didn't move, "Feel. What?" he asked again, louder this time.

"I would love to know that too." came a familiar voice and Sam glared at the man, his jaw clenching and a feral look playing in his eyes. "Got you going there huh kiddo?" the man smiled and sipped on a cocktail as both the woman and the demon vanished. "don't worry you are alive." the man remarked and Sam clicked his tongue off of the roof of his mouth.

"haven't you tortured us enough?" Sam spat angrily.

"Um probably… but its so fun." the man smirked and took a sip of the green coloured liquid in glass.

"Its not, now stop." Sam said and walked over to the bed.

"What, its no fun when you loose everything is it Sam?" the man replied as he walked over and sat in front of him. "First mummy, then that pretty little girl, then Jess, then dear old daddy, now Dean's gonna go to and its all you're fault." he taunted and Sam looked at him with tear filled eyes. "yikes." the man said seriously and Sam let out a small laugh. "part of what I said was true. Well I didn't say it, demonic bitch did." the man smiled. "I'm rooting for you, and she--" he clicked his fingers "--is a peace offering."

"For what?" Sam asked as the woman made her way across the room and sat beside Sam, her black hair brushing against his cheek as she clasped her fingers through his.

"As you said, I've put you and you're brother through enough shit so far and I an rooting for you Sammy, old yellow eyes kinda promised the underworld something great and I'm not a fan of the kid."

"Why are you helping me?" Sam asked.

"What I'm a bad guy right, cant help the god guys and for the record just because I'm a trickster doesn't mean I never tell the truth. Tricks don't always mean lies Sam." he explained and leant back into the cushions that just appeared for him.

"how do I know this isn't a trick?"

"You don't."

"then why…"

"You just have to trust me Sam. I'm not offering you a way out of this deal with Dean, cause I cant do that, I am, however offering you one night with this beauty."

"and what do I have to do?" Sam queried the smell of the woman's perfume begging to get stronger and more prominent every breath he took.

"You know what I want Sam, You know what a million other demons want."

"I cant."  
"Why?"

"I promised Dean."

"So?"

"I cant do it then lie to him."

"why not, its not the first time you've lied is it?"

"no."

"well then, take it or leave it and I'll be nice on this one, you have tonight and tomorrow to think about it. I'll be back. Same time. Same place."

"But I--" Sam trailed off and lay down on the uncomfortable bed, alone once again with the memories and faded dreams swirling around his head.

"Dean would u sit down please?" Naomi asked as she tried to grab hold of Dean as he paced beside her bed. "Dean!" she snapped and he turned around to face her. "Come here." she held her arms out to him and he walked to the bottom of the bed and sat down. "Dean…" Naomi looked away and Dean knew he had hurt her.

"Now is not the time to snuggle Mimi, some weirdo brought my brother back, and they could want us all dead!" he said in a loud voice, causing Naomi to wince at his words. "hey look Mimi I--"

"No dean, you did. I want us to be safe too, I want Sam and our kid to have a chance at safety even if it means we don't. but you know what? you're too blind and too god damned ready to sacrifice yourself for anyone and anything to see that I need you here Dean, and not only that I fucking love you!" Naomi yelled, arms flailing in an attempt to convey how stupid Dean was being.

"I know Naomi and if you think for one single second that I don't feel he exact same way about you then you're wrong. And not only are you wrong you don't know me as well as you thought you did. I'm just…I'm scared Mimi." he confessed and made his way up the bed to where se was sitting and placed his hand on her thigh.

"Dean you're facing hell for you're brother, I don't doubt for a second that you're not prepared, but I also know how terrifying a prospect that it must be given all that you've heard, all that you know about it. I'm scared too Dean." she placed her hand over his and squeezed.

"No Naomi you don't get it, the whole dying thing doesn't bother me, not in the slightest. Everyone's gotta do it right? What scares me is leaving you and Sam and our kid here, alone, without me to protect you. To keep you safe." Dean finished with a smile and Naomi's eyes filled with tears as Dean placed a hand over her stomach and she watched him come undone.

"it's okay Dean." Naomi tried to sooth but all at once she realised that She didn't have much time left with him, if they didn't find a way out of this in four months, Dean wasn't going to be able to see his kid, to hold him and Naomi wasn't going to be able to watch Dean be a dad, she wasn't going to be able to snuggle up in his arms and watch their kid sleep. Through his own sobs Dean felt Naomi begin to shake and moved them so that he was the one with his back to the pillows and Naomi was cradled in his lap. Maybe he was wrong, maybe this was the time for snuggling. Maybe this was all the time for snuggling they would get. Dean didn't realise until that moment exactly what he was leaving behind, exactly how much he meant to her, and so what if Naomi was only one person in a world full off people? To him, she was his whole world, and to know she felt that way about him too, made him finally feel complete. It finally gave him a purpose in life. Something to fight for.

The trickster wasn't kidding when he said he would be back at the same time the next night. He was there in his tux with two beauties on his arm, "about time Sam! I have a premier to get to!" he snapped and Sam laughed. "so what's it gonna be buddy?" he looked at Sam who swallowed hard.

"I want her for one night."

"Hey Sam." the woman smiled.

"Hailie."


	16. What You Couldnt Do,I will

**Disclaimer: **Song "blue SKies" doesnt belong to me it belongs to Strays dont sleep and who ever owns them.

**A/N:** okie, so more angst and soppiness and revealations. those of you who are puzzled by Hailie, i'll inform you that shes an OC that i paired with Sam from his stanford days and is in my story "without you i dont sleep, just dream".

right, i researched this, i winged this and i cried over this. yes i know, i have a heart, so this chapter sets the ball rolling happy dance to a climax... hopfully where are my reviews people sad face PLEASEEEEEEE REVIEW!

there i said please.

so this is dedicated to my dear little stalker C.

Love you all

K

xox

* * *

What You Couldn't Do I Will. 

Sam smiled at the trickster who disappeared under his gaze which was soon turned to Hailie. Suddenly Sam was at a loss, what could he say? What _should_ he say? After all the time that had passed you would think that he would have questions which needed answering but at that moment in time nothing would pass from his lips, even breathing had become a chore.

"It's okay Sam." Hailie whispered, her porcelain soft skin coming into contact with his tanned cheek and he couldn't help leaning into her touch.

"I'm sorry." his voice barely above a hoarse whisper as he gazed into her blue eyes and watched a smile spread across her face.

"I know you are, but we have one night Sam, and I don't want to waste it on the past. Twelve hours isn't a long time, I get to watch the sun set and rise with you for one last time." her hands cupped his face tenderly and she placed a chaste kiss against his lips.

"So what are the rules?" Sam asked and Hailie threw her head back on a laugh.

"We can do anything and go anywhere as long as you know I disappear at seven on the dot."

"Seven."

"Yes, the number after six and before eight." Hailie smiled and Sam had to laugh.

"come on," he kissed her head and threaded his fingers through hers.

"where are we going?" she asked and Sam couldn't help but think how much like a kid she sounded as she bounced after him, her shorter legs barely keeping up with his strides.

"We have a sunset to watch." Sam smiled at her opening the door.

"YAY!" she shouted and bounded out of the door pulling a laughing Sam after her.

_It's been a long year_

_Since we last spoke_

_How's your halo?_

_Just between you and I_

_You and me and the satellites._

Sam sat on the hood of the Impala with Hailie snuggled between his thighs, her back resting on his chest, as they both cuddled under the blanket and watched the sky turn from a blue-y colour to pink, to red until eventually the navy blue of the night sky sprinkled with stars filled their eyes and a cool breeze enveloped them.

"it's surprising the views you get from the city isn't it?" Hailie giggled as she turned around and sat astride Sam. "I was beginning to think you had fallen asleep on me Winchester." she playfully scolded.

"Like I would even do that!" Sam held his hand over his heart and tried his best to look hurt without breaking into fits of laugher. "I know you said to forget the past for tonight but I cant," Sam shook his head sadly and Hailie moved to get up before Sam grabbed her arm, "where are you going?" he asked desperately and Hailie raised her eyebrows at him.

"We're going for a walk. I have things to show you."

"Like a Christmas Carole?" Sam asked and Hailie laughed.

"You could say that. Come on." she smiled and held out her hand which Sam gladly took.

_I never believed you_

_I only wanted to_

_Before all of this_

_What did I miss?_

_Do you ever get Homesick?_

_I can't get used to it_

_I can't get used to it_

_I'll never get used to it_

_I'll never get used to it._

Hailie held on tight to Sam as the manoeuvred their way through the hustle and bustle of the surprisingly crowded streets of this little place.

"Do you remember that night when you came and got me from that bar?" She asked as she looked up at him.

"How could I forget?" Sam answered truthfully, he still had nightmares about that, still thought about how close he had come to loosing her.

"Do you remember what you said to me after…we.. You know…?" Hailie trailed off and Sam smiled.

"You apologised and I said you shouldn't I left you alone." Sam shrugged and Hailie nodded and pointed over the street to a bickering couple and Sam frowned and looked back at her.

"That was us, all the time Sam, promises, arguments and sex." Hailie looked at his again forcing Sam to concede that she was right,

"Not all the time though, we had our good moments too you know." Sam pulled her towards him and began to walk again.

"We did. So why can't you remember them?" Hailie pulled Sam to a stop and he looked at her confused. "Sam, I know about you're little binges and you're "if only's". It wasn't you're fault." her fingers linked with his and she placed her hand roughly where his heart was.

"But, I didn't listen, and I should have. I'm sorry." he whispered again pulling her into his arms.

"Sam, you did listen, all the time, I just, I had issues, you know that besides you're not superman, you couldn't have stopped it even if you tried." Hailie reasoned her head resting against his broad chest.

"I encouraged you to go back."

"I would have eventually. I got to know my mum again, see my niece."

"You were killed."

"Their Safe Sam. My mum an my sisters don't have the fear that he's going to come home in a bad mood. You saved their lives Sammy." She looked up at them, her blue eyes sparkling in the moon light.

"but I lost _you_," Sam stared into her eyes and looked away.

"that's where you're wrong Sam. You didn't. you will never loose me, ever." her hands smoothed over his chest and he tilted her head and he bit his lip. "come on." she whispered and pulled him through the streets again.

_I'm under that night_

_I'm under those same stars_

_We're in a red car_

_You asleep at my side_

_Going in and out of the headlights_

_Could I have saved you?_

_Would that have betrayed you?_

Sam raised his eyebrows when Hailie stopped at the park and turned to look at him, all the while tucking a midnight lock of hair behind her ear,

"A park?" Sam asked surprise and Hailie nodded.

"You have a problem with that, or you don't remember?" it was Hailie's turn to raise her eyebrow.

"I remember, hence the problem I have." Sam smiled and Hailie rolled her eyes.

"Well suck it up cause I wanna look at the stars, we have eight hours left." she tapped her watch as she skipped happily over the a spot under a grand oak tree. Sam sighed as he followed her an stood with his hands on his hips as she pulled the blanket out of her bag an set it out on the ground.

"Hailie, This was.."

"The last time you saw mw the night before I left, yes I know, we didn't get a proper goodbye that time Sam, I just want to make sure we do this time." She shrugged and settled onto her side on the blanket her hand supporting her head.

"So you are certain that its forever this time?" Sam asked as he settled onto his side, his body inches from hers.

"Not forever, we'll meet each other again, but not for a long time Sam, I'll watch over you and you're brother and obviously the girl and the kid when it's born but I wont be there, like I am now." she explained and Sam nodded.

"I've missed you." he confessed reaching out to rest his hand on her hip.

"I've missed you too Sammy." she smiled softly and scooted a little closer to him.

"Since that night, I've thought about you every ingle time I saw a red car. You and you're classic cars. Why did it have to be red?" Sam laughed and Hailie smiled.

"You should laugh more often Sam, it suits you." She ran her fingers through his unruly mop of hair, "an get a hair cut. Not short just tidied." she lent forward and placed a kiss to his lips only to be pushed onto her back as Sam deepened it.

"I don't get what this is about." Sam confessed as he sat up on the blanket an watched as Hailie rolled over onto her back and tucked her hands behind her head.

"What do you mean?"

"Why now? why are you here? why are you reliving the past with me after you said not too?" all of Sam's burning questions pour out of his mouth and Hailie let out a weary sigh.

"Why me and not Jess?" Hailie's eyes met Sam's and he looked away.

"All of those questions point back to the same answer and the same reason or reasons, whatever way you want to put it." Hailie sat up and turned around to face him, taking his gigantic paw into her hands for what seemed like the millionth time that night. Sam bit down on his lip and Hailie looked down.

"what is it?" Sam asked and tilted her head to meet his gaze.

"I want to give you options, I want to show you that life is worth living, that the world goes on even without the ones you love in it. Just because you're world stops spinning doesn't mean everyone else's does. You have to say goodbye to be able to say hello again Sam. You have to close one door to open another, when one light bulb goes out you have to renew it or live in the dark." Hailie felt the tears fill her eyes and looked away from Sam and up into the sky.

"Hailie, I know all of that, I just," he turned her face to his again and wiped away the tear that had fallen. "I don't want to. I don't want to fight without a reason too. Giving up this fight and handing Lilith victory isn't so bad. Loosing Dean is."

"Its not Sam, look. I'm here because I can be, because it wasn't yellow eyes who took me from you. You're mum and Jess aren't gone Sam, they're in hell. To be used as bait. For you. Lilith knows that and she's waiting to get Dean to lure you into her trap, to make you her bitch. Lilith holds Dean's contract. You're mum knew about yellow eyes, as did her mum and her mother before that. Way back when witches were being burned yellow eyes was supposed to have been a warlock. He wasn't, he was much more powerful. Much more. So he was burned at the stake after he was caught delivering a baby and curing it because it was sick." Hailie paused to take a breath and wipe at Sam's tears that had fallen down his cheeks.

"He used to administer Sulphur to sick babies. So when he died, he promised that he would gain power and rule again, so a few months after he was burned, he began to claim children starting with the kid, the little boy, that had cost him his life. He built up a reputation and he carried on doing what he was doing through the centauries. Taking kids, giving them some kind of power. Warning the people of his reign, of his chosen one." Hailie bit down on her lip and shimmied closer to Sam, close enough to give him space but close enough to allow him to reach out for her.

"but what's that got to do with me?" Sam asked and Hailie let out a sigh,

"The kid he was delivering was in you're family line, Sam and it was his own baby." Sam' mouth fell open slightly and Hailie cupped his jaw.

"I'm sorry Sam. that's what makes you the chosen one, you are a direct heir of his. You're mother was warned by family members that it could happen. Because none of you're male family members were affected. When Dean was born, you're mother waited and nothing happened but she knew when she was told you were a boy she knew. So she took precautions. You're life for hers, well, at least until you were old enough to choose." Hailie looked at the ground.

"and Jess?"

"She was a warning, well a reminder. That you had that choice to make. Same with all of you're mother's friends and family. Lilith knew they would tell you, and she would loose power, even back then she feared you." Hailie hated the look in Sam's eyes; the pain and the hurt.

"what about you?" Sam asked as he gripped onto her hand tighter.

"what about me?" She asked moving into his arms and tucking her head beneath his chin.

"Lilith finds out you told me all this,.."

"You can't kill what's already dead Sam, besides, when I cross over, demons cant touch me, and I wanted to say goodbye to you before I left." she placed a kiss on his neck and felt a tear his her head and looked up. "Sam come on." she soothed as she ran her fingers though his hair pulling him into her.

_I wanna burn this film_

_You alone with those pills_

_What you couldn't do I will_

_I forgive you_

_I'll forgive you_

_I'll forgive you_

_I forgive you_

Sam pulled Hailie into him as they walked back to the Impala. They had watched the sunrise and now there was forty five minutes left. Sam stopped and opened her door for her before making his way around to behind the steering wheel.

"Think we'll make it?" She asked as Sam put the key in the ignition,

"45 minutes to drive 7 blocks? Yeah I think I can do that." He said on a smile a Hailie took his hand.

"Told you we'd make it." Sam said triumphantly and gazed at Hailie.

"Sam, do something for me,?" Hailie asked as she moved closer to him and tucked herself under his arm.

"Yeah." Sam kissed her head.

"forgive yourself cause I forgave you a long time ago." she whispered and sat up and placed a deep kiss against Sam's lips. Sam sighed and inhaled her scent.

When he opened his eyes he couldn't help the tear that trailed down his cheek as he stared back at the motel door. A quick check of his watched told him it was a minute past seven. He smiled sadly and wiped his eyes with his sleeve. Silently closing the Impala's door and opening the motel room door to reveal the trickster sitting on his bed, a knowing look on his face,

"What do you want now?" Sam sighed an closed the door.

"I'm just here to make sure you keep up your side of the bargain."


	17. Put me back together with silence & sins

**A/N:** okay, i just wanna give a big thanks to all those who have kept up with me this far, and a massive shout out to camlann who has been awsome! and seriously encouraged my lazy ass to get this up. so i thought i should put everything - well most things- that symbolises the brothers' life in this chapter. so this, will be one of the last chapters in this story! i know! ' but i am planning massive things for you guys to give u a heart attack and make you cry because i am that awsome. well I'm not but roll with me on this one. P.

so yes, camlann this chapter is for you

enjoy

K

xox

* * *

Put Me Back Together With Silence And Sins.

Sam sighed before pushing the hospital curtain aside and smiling at Dean and Naomi. Game face and/or a smile works every time. "hey." Sam said brightly and Dean raised an eyebrow.

"hey back atcha sparky." he laughed and stood up from the chair and put his arm out to help Naomi off of the bed.

"Pregnant, not invalided." she glared but took his arm anyway causing Dean to throw his head back in laughter. "Shut up Winchester." she said as she punched his chest and he let out a small off as Naomi walked off victorious. "Are you two coming or what?" she threw over her shoulder and Sam laughed, placing a hand on his brothers shoulder as they made their way out of the ward.

"So, everything's packed and taken care of all in the trunk for us to go anywhere we need to." Sam smiled and Naomi nodded before slipped her hand into Dean's jacket pocket and linking their fingers.

"Wait!" Naomi yelled and both brothers stopped in their tracks. "my car!" she looked horrified and Sam smiled.

"Bobby's taken it to you're dad's its okay, back seat of the Impala has been cleared out ready for you." Sam smiled again and Naomi's face fell.

"You know. I never thought I'd become one of those girls." she said and Dean looked at her confused.

"What girls?" he asked as she pulled her hand from his and crossed her arms across her chest and stalked to the Impala, which Sam had gotten cleaned.

"Its shiny." She stated on a pout and Sam had to fight the grin off of his face as he opened the back door. "Why am I in the back?" she turned and smiled brightly up at Sam who huffed out a breath and climbed in as Naomi clapped her hands and ran around the Impala and into the passenger side as Dean laughed and opened the drivers door, slipping fluidly behind the wheel and pulling out of the hospital parking lot.

"so where are we headed?" Naomi asked as she settled against the door and unfastened her jeans button.

"to get you some new jeans by the looks of things." Sam laughed from the back seat and watched as Naomi shifted again. "Dean pull over."

"What? Why?" he asked as he did what Sam said and watched as Sam got out and Naomi turned around in her seat.

"Thanks Sam." Naomi giggled as she opened the door and got out and into the back seat. Dean looked worriedly in the rear view and Naomi stretched out on the back seat, her hands pillowing her head. "I'm fine Dean, keep you're eyes on the road." she said on a smile and winked at him. "so where are we going?"

Sam smiled into the rear view and nudged Dean's elbow as the pulled into the 7 - 11. Dean glared at Sam and couldn't help but smile; however, at Naomi sleeping soundly, her hair fanned out over the black sweat shirt she was originally wearing but took off because she was too hot and then ended up snuggled under Dean's leather jacket because she was too cold. Dean chuckled and shook his head as he got out of the car. Walking over to the gas pump Dean looked at Sam as he looked around.

"You gonna tell me what's going around in that freaky head of you're geek boy?" Dean asked as he began to fill his baby up.

"Nothing, what makes you say that anyways." Sam walked around the Impala to lean on it.

"Come on Sam, You're my brother, do you really think I wouldn't notice something's up?" Dean gave Sam a pointed look and Sam had to admit defeat.

"I was talking to an old friend last night." Sam began and looked down at his shoes until Dean cleared his throat obviously wanting to know more. "she told me some stuff."

"Oh it was a she, then why are you still cranky?" Dean mused as he placed the nozzle back into the pump.

"because I didn't sleep with her, she was a friend Dean,"

"Yeah, so, she was also hot, and you seemed more than friends when you drove passed me in the car."

"You saw us?" Sam asked and Dean gave him a 'Duh' which Sam waved off, "Yeah, well she's moved on."

"So? What did she want anyways?"

"Erm…she had information." Sam tone of voice immediately peaked Dean's interest and had him motioning for garage store.

"about?" Dean asked as he headed straight for the sweets but, Sam noticed and smiled, he was in the perfect position to watch the Impala.

"Erm… Yellow eyes and Lilith."

"Yellow eyes and who?"

"Lilith remember the one who wants me dead?"

"Ah, continue." Dean said as he held up a packet of M&Ms and frowned and Sam smiled.

"We coulda had this conversation at the car Dean." Sam laughed and Dean glared at him before picking up another bag of sweets. "anyways, Lilith holds you're contract, and Azazel, yellow eyes, was a witch," Sam said and Dean nodded, his classic 'you have to be kidding me' look on his face. "So we find Lilith and get you out of this." Sam stated and Dean shook his head and turned to face Sam.

"No way, no meddling. you meddle, you die and there is no way I'm making a deal for you to die anyways. Not when I need you here Sam, not when I need you to look after my girl and kid." Dean swallowed around the lump of emotion in his throat.

"Dean, I cant watch you die I wont." Sam grit out and smiled falsely at the old lady who appeared all too interested in they're conversation.

"Then shut you're eyes Sam cause I aint letting you do anything about it oh and one more thing, you do this whole "welcome to the dark side" routine and I will come back and kill you myself." Dean stated matter-of-factly and began to move around the aisles.

"What's you're problem dude why do you want to die so much huh?" Sam hissed and followed Dean as he made his way around the store in silence to get what they needed. "Do you think ignoring me is gonna make it any better Dean?" Sam asked as they reached the counter.

"No, but it will make you shut the hell up." Dean snapped as he handed over the money to a rather startled looking cashier.

"Please don't tell me I'm stuck in a car with you both at each others throats." Naomi groaned causing the brothers to turn around. "Don't Mimi, or baby me, I am _not_ in the mood. What ever you two are arguing about sort it before you get back in the car or I am leaving both you're sorry asses here. You have five minutes cause I need to pee." she patted Dean on the arm and headed in the direction of the toilets.

"You heard the lady." Sam muttered as he grabbed one of the paper bags and left Dean with the heavier one to carry.

"There's nothing to sort out, I'm dying, you're not. End of story." it was Dean's turn to smile at the old woman as they walked out into the Impala.

"Why?" a simple question.

"Because I said so." that was met with a simple answer.

"Why is it what you want Dean huh?" Sam pressed as he put the car in the foot well of the back seat.

"Because it's my life to do whatever the hell I choose with, and I think I've given this family enough so yeah, its time to think about me for a change." Dean leant across the back seat to put the bag with the other one.

"Dean. Why are you so set on dying, why do you want to?" Sam asked again and Dean stood up and leant on the roof of the Impala.

"I don't want to die Sam. But then again who does? I want to be able to take my kid to the park, I want to be there on their wedding day, I want to be that old guy in the rocking chair with my wife beside me talking about how much we've been through. I don't wanna be the guy holding my pregnant wife knowing that in five minutes some hell hound is gonna come and rip me to shreds." Dean confessed and jumped when he felt two leather clad arms slip around his waist, instantly relaxing when he felt a warm, familiar weight lean against his broad back. He turned around and pulled Naomi into a hug, his head settling on top of hers as he felt her tears soaking his cotton shirt.

Sam let out a steadying breath as Dean kissed Naomi's head and motioned for Sam to get into the Impala as he slipped into the back seat with Naomi still wrapped up in his jacket and his arms.

Sam gazed into the rear view and set his jaw at the image of his sleeping brother and a worried looking Naomi, currently fiddling with Dean's amulet. He hated lying to Dean and he hated how alone Naomi was going to be, but his mind was made up, and there was nothing Dean would do about it.


	18. Old Habits, Die Hard

**A/N:** Right, this chapter isnt what i thoguht it would be, as i decided half way through writing it that I wasnt going to launch into the big OMFG! story climax and it was going to take it slowly and let you properly understand things haha.

So about 3 chapters to go and then it's all done '.

The first thing you'll notice about this chapter is the fact that it's more grammatically accurate and makes more sense than the rest of them, and that's all down to the amazing Camlann who beta'd this for me! she's an absoloute STAR!

The second thing you'll notice is the length! yes, its like four chapters of mine rolled into one haha! That's also down to Camlann for giving me pointers on how to lengthen my chapters to give you guys something to actually read LOL! so from now on this is what you can expect!

Have fun reading this, and my anonymous reviews are enabled so you do not have to sign into the site to leave me a review!

So, enjoy and review!

K

xox

* * *

Old Habits Die Hard.

Things were as they should be, Dean concluded one night, a month away from his death date in some random motel room. Sam was stretched out on his bed using the laptop and Naomi was sitting on the floor, colored pens and pencils, fabrics and glitter, glue and paper strewn around her in an orderly mess; or so she claimed. Dean reached above his head to stretch out the kink in his back and smiled softly as his eyes landed on the slight swell of Naomi's stomach.

"Dude, can you please stop eyeing up my belly--its rather discerning," Naomi mumbled around the cherry-red pen she currently had gripped between her teeth shifted the drawing board that was balanced on her knees, the outline of the dress she was currently designing demanding her complete attention.

"Sure, as soon as you stop hanging around with little brother and double teaming me with big words," Dean smirked.

"Of course, what he means is that his brain is too infantile to understand the mechanics of the English language enough to be able to form an actual sentence in an adult conversation." Sam met Dean's smirk with one of his own.

When Dean's eyebrows almost vanished into his hair line, Sam and Naomi looked at each other, the amusement etched clearly in their faces. Placing the paper and pens on the floor, Naomi pushed herself up off of the dingy motel room carpet and dusted herself off before crawling up the bed and pushing Dean's legs together, so she could sit astride him.

"That, translated into Dean, means you're stupid," she informed him, and he sighed before throwing an M&M at Sam, hitting him right in the center of his forehead.

"I may be stupid, but I have a deadly aim," Dean grinned smugly, and Naomi crushed her bottom lip between her teeth to mute her laughter at the look on Sam's face.

"How old are you? Five?" Sam scowled from his bed pushing himself up into a sitting position.

_Since when did this become serious? _Naomi thought as Dean's smile turned into a glare.

"Oh, I'm sorry did my flying M&M's hurt Little Sammy's feelings?" Dean's voice had an edge to it that didn't bode well for a peaceful evening, and Naomi sighed. _The plan was, to get these designs finished by half ten and get to bed, now, I'm going to be caught in the middle of a full scale war between them. I can't deal with this tonight, I simply wont. Either they buck up their ideas and grow a pair, or I'm getting my own room. You'd think Dean would be the one to step in and handle this, knowing fine well I'll be the one stuck in the middle, hell, he's been there before with Sam and his dad. But no, why should he? Leave it all for Naomi. As per bloody usual._

When Sam glowered and went to make a move Naomi knew it was only going to be her that would stop this.

"Uh-oh," she said as she got off of Dean and made her way over to placate Sam. "Come on Sammy, Let it go."

"I haven't even _said_ anything yet, why do you always take his side?" Sam glared at her, and Naomi rolled her eyes, letting out a loud sigh. _Sure Sammy__'__s volatile but this is just strange._

"Sam, what's wrong?" she asked gently.

"Why does something have to be wrong? He just _threw_ something at me!" Sam defended his actions and moved his gaze from Naomi to Dean.

"Yes, he did—I was here and I saw him do it. It was playful, Sam—we were joking, you know, 'ha-ha that was funny'—I started it." Being gentle and subtle was never one of Naomi's strong points, and now, she had decided, was the time to be blunt.

"Well, maybe if he would talk to me like an adult instead of throwing things like a five-year-old I wouldn't have to get pissed off, and you wouldn't have to take his side." Sam clenched his jaw, and Naomi made up her mind she was having Dean's baby and then no more. _Just the one. No arguments, no fights, just peace and quiet._

"Oh, sorry, Dr. Phil, let's talk about my how I feel then, shall we? I was gifted with a pain-in-the-ass for a little brother, who thinks talking solves problems when I know for a goddamned fact that it doesn't, so he can kiss my ass!" Dean spat as anger danced in his green eyes.

"For God's sake! Pack it in you two!" Naomi spat and flashed an incredulous look at both boys. "I'm sick of this," she yelled irritably and Sam and Dean's heads both snapped around to meet her gaze. "Right now, I really couldn't care less how much you hate each other—I don't give a shit what went down between you two at that gas station. Now I know siblings argue. I get that. But you two just take the freaking cake! You both need to grow up and start acting like grown men. I am not your go-between, I do not favor one over the other," she said looking Sam in the eye, "This constant arguing between you both _hurts_ me. Or haven't you noticed?" she asked throwing her arms up in the air as she ranted from in between the two beds. "To be honest, I think it's highly unlikely either of you have, because you've both been too goddamned wrapped up in arguing over little things with each other to notice the effect it has been having on anyone else, or each other! You wanna argue, fine, but don't do it when I'm around," she yelled as she adopted her classic defensive I'm-sick-of-your-crap pose: arms folded across her chest, legs shoulder width apart, left leg slightly bent at the knee.

"I'm sorry Naomi," Dean whispered gingerly from his bed and swung his legs off of the side to sit facing his brother, elbows rested on his knees his shoulders slumped.

"Sam, just because I'm in love with Dean, doesn't make you any less important to me." Naomi explained, her tone softening slightly. Sam looked at her, suddenly feeling like the kid who stole the candy. _Damn, she__'__s good at this._

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry, too." Sam conceded the fact that she was more than likely right, as he swung his leg over the edge of the bed and adopted the same pose as his older brother.

"Good, now, I'm gonna clear my stuff up and go get a shower. You guys have a serious freaking talk 'cause this has to be the last of it. I mean it, guys--no more arguing," she said tiredly, her usual smile in place but a serious tone passing her lips. Dean nodded and held his hand out to her, which she completely ignored, choosing instead to climb onto his lap and crush her lips against his, her way of reassuring him that she wasn't going to stay mad at him forever, but she needed him to sort this out and fast.

"Why don't you have a bath instead?" Dean said against her lips and she smiled.

"Didn't think that it would take that long" she joked and Dean chuckled.

"Go on, I'll get this," he told her, motioning to the floor.

"No, it's fine, I'll get it—I don't want you using it as an excuse to avoid talking you're your brother."

"Would I do that?" he asked with false indignation.

"Yes," she said simply, kissing the tip of his nose as she stood up and let his hand go.

Dean didn't respond as he simply watched her set about putting her supplies back into their respective containers and all her designs into the folder before placing it all on top of the big box that contained her materials. With a tired smile, she retreated to the bathroom, leaving the door cracked open a little bit, a habit that she had fallen into ever since that night at the hospital, where the realization of losing Dean finally hit home.

"Dean," Sam said his name softly into the silence that was between them.

By Sam acknowledging the task that was set and deciding to grow-up and actually do something about it, Sam had forced Dean into a corner; he could step up to the challenge and talk about it, or he could make some smartass remark and leave. A harsh look in the mirror from Naomi made the decision for him, and with a heavy sigh, Dean looked _at_ his brother instead of _through_ him.

"Sam." Dean regarded.

"I don't hear much talking going on in there."

"Sorry, Mom!" Sam laughed, turning around on the bed to see a towel-clad, well if the thin piece of worn cotton she had wrapped around her a towel could be classed as a towel, Naomi standing with her hands on her hips, one eyebrow raised and a very pointed, "don't talk to me like that" look on her face, she licked her lip and smiled gently closing the bathroom door a little bit more, and Dean knew then what she was doing. Given that the bathroom door was probably made of cardboard and she could hear what they were saying through it, she was trying to give them space. Although, Dean mused, she was still kinda listening to them to make sure they were still there.

It was the stupid things like that, he concluded, that had made him fall for her in the first place. The way her eyes seemed to dance when she laughed, or when she walked away from him, pretending she wasn't listening as he talked to other girls at the bar, even though he knew she was insanely jealous. There were the little things he hated about her too, like trying to get him to talk about his feelings, well not really _trying to get him to_, more like _getting him to,_ talk about his feelings—kinda like she was doing now. Only this time, this time, she had gotten Sam to do it. Well, she had set Sam up to do it. All she needed him to do now was come through… or maybe that's not what she wanted, Dean reasoned, she knew Dean pretty well…maybe she knew that he wouldn't talk so maybe she was hinting that she really wanted him to join her in the shower, hence why she suggested the shower in the first place…

"Dean have you even been listening?" Sam asked, and judging by the guilty expression on Dean's face, it was pretty damn obvious to Sam that his older brother hadn't heard a thing he'd said in the past few minutes. "Where's your head at, Dean? We're supposed to be talking about our issues like Naomi suggested," Sam said, his voice taking on a familiar prissy, you-have-to-do-this voice.

"I was thinking about Naomi actually." Dean countered, trying to keep the smirk from his face.

"What, so instead of doing what she asked you to do, you think thinking about her makes it somehow okay for you to not shoulder your half of this conversation?" Sam snapped, and both brothers sighed when Naomi cleared her throat in the bathroom.

"I'm tired, Sam," Dean said suddenly, dropping his head into his hands, and Sam froze. He'd heard this admission one too many times from his brother, and it broke him a little inside to see a glimpse of the real Dean underneath all the bravado. _Oh god, this little moment of the real Dean underneath, this is gonna be bigger than Naomi first thought__—__ if he goes where I think he__'__s going to go with this, it__'__ll be the end of her._

"Of what, Dean?" he asked, and Sam was as shocked as Dean was when his voice emerged in little more than a whimper.

"Everything. I mean, come on, why do we have to be the ones to save people, huh? Why do we have to risk our asses day after day? Why am I not gonna get to see my kid grow up?" Dean paused to compose himself, the cold sweat that had his shirt stick to him as it spread over his back, made him feel claustrophobic or was that the hard knot that had lodged its self in his throat making breathing difficult. _for god's sake Dean, you're not some stupid kid anymore, you're making this harder than it has to be. _He thought as he tried to ignore his heart thundering in his chest and give his brother the 'grown-up' talk he so desperately wanted. "I'm tired of hunting," he said after a moment, his voice emerging in little more than a whisper. "I'm tired of hurting. I just wanna let it all go, Sam—I just want it to stop," he murmured, trying to control his breathing, turning his gaze away from Sam who was one word away from a breakdown himself.

"I want that for you too, Dean. I want you to be happy. I want you to see your kid go to school, go to college, get married, have kids—I want you to be here for all of that. That's why you gotta let me help you, Dean. You gotta let me try to save you." Sam so wasn't above begging at this point, and he also wasn't above wishing Naomi had not gone for a shower and was here in the room to fix things, to soothe Dean's pain. _When Naomi__'__s around, Dean__'__s never hurt, angry, or sad__—__he__'__s happy, _Sam thought to himself as he silently prayed she would come out of there and make things better with Dean.

With Sam's admission, Dean shut down and turned away from him, no doubt trying to get his emotions in check, before he began to tear Sam a new one for turning this into one of those stupid chick flick moments that he hated so much. Sam watched through his own tears as he saw the struggle to keep his game face on for him, to stop the tears rolling down his cheeks. It was in that instant that it occurred to Sam, the day he finally realized how much Naomi meant to Dean. _It was that time when Dean was about twenty-one…he got busted up pretty bad that night, _Sam recalled, _We were in Chicago… _

_Sam has woken with a start when the motel room door had crashed off of the wall, the room filling with the night air, and Sam watched in horror as John dragged Dean's ass into the room Placing the twenty-one year old's lifeless body down as gently as he could on the far away bed, John turned to settle a firm gaze on his seventeen year old._

"_Do not turn on the light and keep you're ass in that bed, you hear me?" John's tone conveyed the severity of the situation to Sam who nodded mutely in reply. Things were bad. Things were really, really bad. Listening to Dean sob and beg his father to make it stop was pure torture for Sam, he wanted to go over to that other bed and help settle Dean down. Tiredness overcame him first as he faced away from Dean's bed and cried himself to sleep, his own tears drowning out Dean's, as he came to the conclusion that, in times like these, it was okay to cry._

_Sam was jolted awake by their father after hours in a restless sleep, and was told to keep an eye on Dean while he went out to get some more stuff for the first aid kit._

"_Everything's alright Sam." he'd said when he caught the fear in his eyes at the thought of him having to go and refill the first aid kit after only filling it just after the last hunt. Sam however, knew the truth, nothing was ever okay in their family, he pulled on his jeans and padded softly across the room to the little kitchen, area with the intention to make some coffee. A loud groan, followed by a hiss, startled Sam and he spun around, grip tightening on the coffee pot so it wouldn't crash to the floor, as he saw Dean half out of the bed reaching for something on the floor._

"_Dean!" Sam hissed as he set the coffee pot aside and hurriedly made his way over to his brother, leaning over Dean to grab his shoulders. "What the hell are you doing?" Sam asked as he manhandled Dean as gently as he could back onto the bed. "If you wanted something you could have asked me." Sam bit out through gritted teeth._

_"Give me My phone." Dean stated._

_"You didn't ask nicely."_

_"Do I look like I'm in the mood to argue?" Dean huffed out, and by the look on his face, Sam could tell that he was in some real pain. Biting back his retort Sam got up and searched through the pile of bloody, discarded clothing until he found his brother's cell and handed it to him._

_"Happy now Jerk?" Sam snapped, trying to maintain the mood so that Dean wouldn't realize how bad off he really was, that things weren't so bad…_

_"Yeah, now go…shower or something bitch--you stink." Dean managed to force out past the pain barrier and Sam got up and grabbed his duffle, shaking his head as he made his way to the bathroom. Closing the door over so he could see Dean but Dean couldn't see him, he watched Dean dial a number, his hands shaking with the effort it took to focus through the pain, he bit back the gasp when he saw Dean wipe a stray tear that had fallen after exchanging normal pleasantries but couldn't hold back the gasp when Dean said those words. _

"I just needed to hear your voice." Sam said into the empty silence of the room and Dean's head came up to look at Sam.

"What?" he asked as he looked at Sam as though he was some freak.

"You said that."

"When?" Dean said defensively.

"Illinois, remember... Where was it…Chicago! You were on your cell to Naomi," Sam relayed his most recent trip down memory lane to his brother.

"Yeah," Dean smiled sadly and looked at Sam, releasing a weary sigh. "Sammy, there's no way I'm letting you do anything. Like I told you, the deal is, you meddle—we try to weasel our way outta this—we both die, Sam. And I need you here to take care of her." Dean motioned to the bathroom with his head, and Sam shook his sadly.

"So you mean I gotta watch you die, knowing that there was something I could have done to save you?" And there was the angry pit of hurt and guilt and pain that Sam was so used to feeling boiling away.

"No, Sam, you don't have to watch me. I would rather you didn't, if neither you or Naomi where there when..." Dean trailed off and Sam straightened.

"Yeah like I'm gonna let you do that by yourself." Sam snorted and Dean raised his eyes.

"Yes, you are," Dean said simply and Sam looked at him.

"I'm proud of you, Dean, and I admire you. And yeah, screw the 'no chick flick moments' rule, dude--you're the best big brother a little brother could have ever asked for. You've done a lot of stuff for me Dean, stuff that you shouldn't have done. You've given your life for me, man—that has to mean something," Sam stated, not caring about the fact that hot tears had begun to make their way down his cheek, and he sniffed and laughed slightly.

Dean shifted uncomfortably, not sure how to respond. Sure he could spill his heart out right now, but where would that get him? Absolutely nowhere. Well, it would take him to the point of severe emotional trauma and perhaps the startling conclusion that this was indeed the final month of his life…Dean refused to look up, refused to meet Sam's gaze.

"I'm going for a walk," he announced, and all too quickly, his jacket was snatched up and he was out the door.

"Sam?" Naomi called from the bathroom and he turned toward her, just able to see her face through the crack in the door.

"I pushed him too hard, didn't I?" Sam whispered sadly, and Naomi shook her head.

"Come here," she said quietly, and Sam did as he was asked, getting up from the bed and walking into the bathroom to lean against the sink, keeping his eyes focused on the wall.

"Sam, it's a bubble bath, you can't see anything, you know," she told him jokingly, trying to lighten the mood slightly, the problem was he loved Sam too damned much to drop that stupid guard around him. Naomi reached out her hand and took his, "It'll be fine, Sam, I promise you," she said, and Sam nodded, not really believing her but wanting to so badly.

* * *

Dean ran his hand down his face as the cool night air enveloped him in its icy grip. _This talking about your feelings shit isn't for me_, he decided. In twenty-six years, Sam had seen Dean cry three times. And those three times, Dean was either out of it with pain or freely opening up to Sam. But it was never easy. He let out a shaky breath and wiped his hands on his jeans, shocked at how damp his palms were in the chilly night time air. Turning around to face his room, Dean saw Sam retreat to the bathroom, looking somehow subdued, dragging his feet, like he was tired. Dean closed his eyes against the wetness building up and blurring his vision. There had only been three times. There wasn't going to be a fourth.

"Damn it." Dean swore, as he turned around again and slamming his fist on the railing outside the door before gripping it with both hands, looking at his reflection on the hood of the Impala. Sighing, Dean hung his head limply between his shoulders and closed his eyes, hoping to make the rest of the world go away and fix itself.

Sam turned and peered around the bathroom door when he heard the motel room door open and watched as Dean walked back into the room and took off his jacket, throwing it onto the chair. Sam smiled at him, and walked in to the room himself when Naomi slapped at his thigh. Making his way slowly back over to the bed, Sam let out a nervous laugh when both he and Dean sat down into the exact same position at the exact same time.

"Sam, you know how proud I am of you," Dean's abrupt confession had Sam pulling his bottom lip between his teeth and fighting against the tears that were filling up his eyes once more. "And I think that after this," Dean continued, "After this war, I think you should go back to school. You were happy there, much happier than you have ever been on the road with me. And don't BS me that you've been happy, 'cause I know you miss normal. I know that you miss having an actual home, and I think it would be good for you, and you'd get to spend time with Naomi and the baby, you know, take care of them for me. Oh, and take care of my other baby, the one who's getting all wet out there in the rain," Dean said with a slight smile. Referring to the Impala always raised the mood. It was something they had done together the first time their dad had wrecked it, and Dean had spent hours under the car, putting her back together again while Sam kept him company. Just like they had spent hours putting their relationship back together again.

"Thanks Dean, you know I will." Sam sniffed and Dean smirked.

"We're not gonna have to hug, are we? 'Cause that could get awkward," Dean concluded and Sam laughed,

"No, Dean, no hugs necessary. Hey, Naomi you can come out now," Sam called behind him and the bathroom door swung open to reveal a very tearful but happy looking Naomi.

"Come here," she whispered as she walked over to Sam's bed placing a massive kiss on his temple. "Thanks, Sammy," she whispered again as he hugged her.

Naomi watched as Dean shoved off his boots and stood up to take off his jeans. Sam cleared his throat, and Naomi giggled, wiggling out of Sam's embrace and letting him vanish into the bathroom. Naomi watched Dean kick his jeans off and pull his t-shirt over his head all the while mumbling something about her being able to take the side closer to the middle of the room 'cause it was warmer. Naomi smiled and walked over to her hand bag which was sitting on top of the dresser and took out an envelope as Dean pulled down the sheets and settled on his back.

"Dean," she said as she untied her robe, her baby bump even more prominent under the silk nightgown she was wearing, and Dean smiled, pulling the covers back on her side and stretching out an arm for her to be able snuggle up against him. "In a minute --I want you to see this," she whispered climbing into bed but not laying down as Dean sat up, confusion and worry etched on his face, only to be smoothed out into a smile when Naomi beamed at him handing him an envelope.

"What's this?" he asked as he held it lightly in his hand, testing the weight of it in his grasp. It had some weight to it, not a lot, but enough to worry him.

"Just open it!" she playfully scolded him and he smiled, flipping it around to gently tear at the seal. Dean pulled a white sheet of cardstock out of the magnolia envelope and opened it up. "It's our baby, Dean," Naomi said with a smile, eyes full of pride and tears. Dean smiled and coughed a little, almost choking on the massive lump of emotion lodged in his throat.

"I love you," he burst out all at once, and Naomi smiled, suddenly tired and ready to snuggle.

"I love you, too," she whispered when Dean set the ultrasound photo on his bedside table and allowed Naomi to get herself comfortable before spooning in behind her, placing feather-light kisses along her shoulder.

"Keep that up and Sam will have a heart attack when he finally comes out of the bathroom." Naomi mused and Dean knew she was half asleep already by the softness of her voice. "Oh and Dean?"

"Hmm?" he responded, even as he felt the hands of sleep begin to tug impatiently at him.

"Thanks for tonight, sweetheart," Naomi mumbled around a yawn and Dean smiled, a kiss against the bare skin of her shoulder his only response.

* * *

She really did look as though she had planned her outfit around this very diner when she got out of bed that morning. Her now bobbed hair was as scraped back into a bun as it would allow, held in place with bobby-pins and a cherry red hair-band, to match her cherry red lips, and her cherry red glasses, and her cherry red nails, and her cherry red belt that was nestled underneath her breasts and her cherry red shoes and, of course the cherry red booth they were currently sitting in. Sam had found the whole situation hilarious. So had Dean, but Dean had learned that to piss off Naomi was hardly a good thing, but to piss off a very achy and cranky Naomi was one of the worst things you could possibly do.

Naomi sighed again, how could this have possibly happened? How could she have gotten stuck in the only diner to still have cherry red seats in all of America on the day she chose to wear red? Deciding to take her mind off of the current situation she gazed around the room, her brow furrowing in confusion when her eyes came to land on a familiar face, a face that Naomi couldn't pin a name too, or even, the place where she knew the person from.

"Dean?" Naomi muttered into his neck where she was currently snuggled, her face as cherry red as the rest of the room.

"Yeah?" he asked softly, going with the whole 'I'm-the-caring-non-jerk' routine, all the while sliding Naomi's sausage from her plate to his.

"For a start, you can put that back on my plate," she said irritably, causing Sam to giggle and then gasp in pain as her foot connected with his shin. "And second of all, where have I seen that old woman before?" she asked pushing up into a sitting position and blinking away the dizziness that the one simple movement entailed.

"Which one, Mimi? This place is crawling with old broads." He looked at her, then dropped his hand to massage her lower back.

"The one over there—she keeps staring over here with her grandma-blue tinted hair and the really large nose. How can you not know which one it is?" she replied bitchily, at the same time leaning back into Dean's warmth and the comfort his hand was bringing to the annoying pain in her back.

"She does look familiar," Dean agreed, and Sam angled his shiny silver cup in the direction his brother and Naomi was looking in to see who they were looking at without turning all the way around and drawing even more attention to them than Dean and Naomi already were.

"Is that not the lady from the gas station?" Sam looked them.

"Bingo! She was leering at me when I came out of the bathroom, a bit like she's doing now. She's annoying me and if she doesn't stop she'll end up wearing her breakfast." Naomi spat and Dean kissed the top of her head. _Naomi Nichols, ladies and gentlemen, my little firecracker. _

"Well, sweetheart, there's nothing we can do about the fact that you're the best looking woman in the world, and if she wants to stare at you, hell, let her stare. Let that bald guy who's eyeing up Sammy stare, too, cause you're all mine. Oh and about that…" Dean trailed off and took a sip of his coffee as Naomi sighed irritably. "How about we make it official?" he asked, and Naomi jerked away from his side, bolting upright in the seat to stare at him incredulously.

"But We already have Dean," Naomi said confusedly, as she held up her left hand, his ring still sitting loosely on her ring finger.

"No, I mean make You a Winchester, actually get married." Dean clarified for her.

"Are you serious?" she asked disbelievingly. "Hell yeah! Come here." Dean held his arms open to her and she jumped into them. "I love you, Dean!" Naomi whispered against his neck, and Dean laughed slightly as she turned around and snuggled down into him lifting her coffee cup to toast the occasion, only to almost choke when she took a sip. "What's wrong?" they asked simultaneously, concern lacing their voices as both men stared at her worriedly.

"Nothing." Naomi shook her head and laughed before taking Dean's hand and placing it on her bump, intertwining their fingers and watching his face light up when their baby kicked beneath their palms.

Dean couldn't help the small laugh that bubbled past his lips, causing Sam to smile and Naomi to grip his hand a little tighter, but as weird as it currently sounded, he was happy. The one woman who he would literally do anything for had agreed to become his wife, his kid was healthy, and his brother, as edgy as he seemed, was finally letting him deal with this his way. As Dean felt his baby kick against his palm once more he allowed himself to believe this once, that maybe, just maybe everything would be alright.

Sam smiled at his brother, Dean's happiness in that moment only fueling his need to do this one thing for Dean. Only the woman's close proximity was making him nervous-- she could blow this whole thing out of the water. Naomi sighed contentedly as the baby moved beneath both their hands and tucked into her breakfast, all cut up by Dean, whom, Naomi was certain, had taken it upon himself to help her eat it, too. Absently, Naomi thought there was something odd about the way the old woman was looking over at them, like she was watching them, waiting for something to happen. She shook the thought out of her mind and put it down to hormones but the way Sam was toying with the cup and pushing his food around his plate, when only moments ago he was wolfing it down as though he hadn't seen any food for months, hinted that there was something definitely going on, and she was definitely going to find out.


	19. Cherishing Bittersweet Memories

**A/N**:Right, thing are hotting up, this is a bit angsty, funny, awww, and soppy so be warned. And i dont own songs mentioned in this chapter if you havent hear them you may wanna download/youtube/whatever them cause althought you dont need them to understand, you can get into my little mindset and see where i am coming from.

ALSO! massive hugs and thanks and stuff to the Wonderful Camlann who took the time to sit through this when it was rubbish and help me make it readbale for you lot!

okay, so 2 maybe 3 chapters left..u with me?

K

xox

* * *

Naomi breathed harshly into the thick air of the room, and brought her hand up to wipe away the sweat that had gathered on her brow. There was no air to breathe in this room, just fiery, hot heat and clamminess. With a groan, she shifted into a sitting position, kicking the sheet off of her feet and placing them onto the cool floor. A shift in the mattress alerted her that her bed buddy was awake, and in a few moments, she knew, his arms were going to wrap around her, and the heat would get worse. So, Naomi stood away from the damp sheets and away from a very confused Dean. Leaning on the bedside table, Naomi tried to catch her breath in the way too warm room.

"Babe?" Dean asked huskily, the heat obviously having gotten to him, too. Naomi knew she didn't dare turn around as, no matter how rough she was feeling, as soon as she saw Dean like _that__—__all tanned, toned, and shimmering with the thin layer of sweat that he usually only got when…he was hunting. _Naomi blinked a few times, she didn't need an image of Dean, like that in her head. _Oh, no, not when I can__'__t properly do anything about it, sure I__'__ve been with him since I got pregnant, but sometimes a girl needs a little more than "making love.__" _A smile passed over her face but quickly vanished when Dean's hand came to rest on hers, then his damp hair was pressing against her neck and his hands were on her hips, Naomi took a deep breath and tried to think of something else, because if she carried on with this train of thought_, _she would be back in that bed, with him, and Sam would have a fit when he walked in. _Wait, _Naomi thought, a wave of nausea washing over her as her fingers gripped the edge of the table, _where is Sam? _Her mind began to race through the possibilities: the old woman, Sam doing something stupid, losing Dean, losing them both…

"Naomi." Dean's breath was warm on her cheek as he cradled her to him, his touch sending fire through her veins as he held her carefully, softly wiping the fallen tears from her cheeks as she sobbed in frustration. Turning into him, Naomi sucked her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down softly. _Stupid tears, stupid hormones, stupid me for crying when I don__'__t know why,_ _Stupid Sam, stupid Dean, stupid heat._ Her whole body shook with sobs as Dean held her closer still, whispering against her temple that things were okay, that they were fine. Lifting her hand, she pushed against his collarbone to get him to let go. She was too warm, and Dean was hot, in more ways than one. Her hand met the thin sheen of sweat that was covering Dean's body, just as she had suspected it would.

"Dean," Naomi began, unsure if that was a plea or a question, but his hand was pulling her hair back and away from her face while the other was reaching blindly for a hair tie to help her out.

"We have to get you cool," Dean soothed, even his voice sounding hot, which was only serving to frustrate Naomi more.

"Sam."

_What the hell is with the goddamned monosyllables? real attractive Naomi—what are you, like, five? _Naomi cursed, mentally kicking herself.

"What about Sam?"

W_ait…where are we going, Dean? _But, the only sound to pass her lips was another sob, and Naomi clutched at Dean's shoulders, fully aware that they were in motion, and as she watched the door get further away, Naomi's muddled brain figured out that she was being taken into the bathroom.

"Sam," she whimpered again, and Dean cupped her jaw in his palm, tilting her face to look at him.

"Naomi, what's wrong?" his voice was gentle as he sat her on the edge of the counter in the bathroom, blindly fiddling with the tap to get the water to run cool as he ran his hands up and down her bare thigh to soothe her, because, manliness be damned, he couldn't watch her cry like this and do nothing.

"Where's Sam?" _Finally! _the little voice in Naomi's head called, and Dean looked at her restlessly, confused as to why she was so worried about his sleeping brother.

"In his bed," Dean laughed softly as he soaked the washcloth in the cool water before gently patting at Naomi's face and neck with it.

"No, he's not," Naomi shivered when Dean switched hands, his cool hand resting lightly on her hip. _I knew I should have worn pajamas to bed and more than this stupid flannel shirt that smells like him.__—__he__'__s so hot when he__'__s all wet, and gentle and…_Naomi's thoughts gave way to lust as she crushed her lips to his, relishing in the squeak of surprise, and then both of Dean's ice cold hands were on her flushed skin. Dean snaked one of his arms around her back, pulling her closer and cupping her jaw with the other hand as she raked her nails down his back, leaving behind pink welts.

A sharp click, followed by the creak of the door, killed anything between them quicker than it had started. Not moving his hands from Naomi, Dean looked at the open bathroom door and tried to gauge the size of the shadow coming into the outer room.

"Don't. Move," Dean whispered harshly to her, rolling his eyes when she slid off of the counter and stood beside him. Dean pushed her behind him and slowly edged towards the door, looking for something that could be used as a weapon since he'd left his knife under his pillow. _Goddamn it, I freaking knew it! _Naomi huffed out a breath, as she gripped Dean's bicep and pushed past him, flipping the light on as she went.

"Where the hell have you been?!" she yelled, and Dean looked around the door only to frown when he saw his little brother standing unsteadily in the doorway.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was supposed to ask permission," Sam told her sarcastically, his words slurring a bit as he stared back at them blearily. Naomi huffed out a breath and looked at Dean.

"You're drunk," Dean stated and Naomi threw him an incredulous look. _Thank you, Captain Obvious._

"How much have you had?" she asked simply, turning an angry gaze on the younger man. The room was still hot, but Naomi's temper was fraying, and Sam, she knew deep down, was only going to make things worse.

"Not nearly enough."

_Bingo._ Naomi sighed and walked over to Sam as she watched him unravel.

"I can't save him," he whispered, so softly that Naomi could barely make him out, so she knew Dean hadn't heard.

"Dean, fix the salt lines please," Naomi told him, indicating the broken salt line at the door where Sam had obviously stumbled through. "It's okay, Sammy." she whispered against his head as she unfastened his jacket and watched Dean put the salt down.

"No, it's not! You have to promise me." He told her, grabbing her upper arms and forcing her to look at him. Her startled intake of breath made Dean look up, concern marring his features.

"Promise you what? Sam, let go, please—you're hurting me," she smiled uneasily, trying to put on the front that she wasn't mad at him and trying to get out of the vice grip he had on her.

"You have to look after him when I can't." Sam stared at her, his grip tightening and her breathing beginning to speed up.

"Sam, let go," she pleaded, but Sam just stared at her, waiting for an answer, his grip tight enough that Naomi knew it would bruise if he held on much longer.

"Hey, Sammy, let her go, man," Dean said, rising to his feet from his crouched position by the door.

"Naomi, I need you to promise me." Sam's eyes bored through her tear-filled ones, and she agreed silently, her head moved ever so slightly, but to Sam that wasn't enough. "Promise me!" Sam commanded and Dean made his way over to his brother and fiancée.

"Sam, let her go. Now." Dean tried his best to be calm even as the first tear spilled down Naomi's cheek.

"Okay, I promise." Naomi told him, taking deep breaths to try and get her breathing back under control.

"Thank you!" Sam said suddenly, pulling her into a crushing hug, and Naomi nodded against his shoulder, jumping back into Dean's open arms when Sam finally let her go. Dean sat Naomi's trembling form onto their bed, a quick look in her eyes and a tender kiss to her forehead before he turned to his brother.

"Come on, Sasquatch. Time for bed," Dean said evenly, before swinging Sam's legs onto the bed and flipping the light back off. With a sigh, he walked around to his side of the bed and climbed in, arm thrown out, the sheet covering his hips and legs, same as every night, every night since she came into his life all those years ago. The heat of the room all but forgotten, Naomi managed a smile as she curled into him, an infrequent occurrence since she'd begun to show. Rarely had she snuggled into him the way she was now: head tucked into the space between his jaw and shoulder, leg thrown over his, right hand helplessly clutching at his shoulder. Dean let out a breath and turned towards her slightly, his arms pressing her closer to him, shielding her, protecting her, making sure she was there.

"Dean," she whispered into his neck, and he kissed her forehead softly. "I'm scared." Dean sighed against her hair, kissing her again as he tried to comfort her.

"There's nothing to worry about sweetheart, nothing to be scared of, everything's okay. Nothing can hurt you. I'm here." Dean kissed her head again as she nodded weakly against his shoulder, her thoughts remained in her head. The heat of the room swirled around her once again but it wasn't difficult to know what she was thinking as she gripped onto him tighter._ But for how much longer?_

* * *

Dean let out a laugh. He knew he shouldn't, but he couldn't help it. "Not funny, Dean," Naomi told him, glaring at him from the bowl of cereal she was twirling her spoon in before taking a mouthful. Dean waited, listening for the sound of Sam retching and smiling when Naomi suddenly bowed her head, dropped her spoon and made a dash for the bathroom, battering the door until Sam opened it and promptly landed on his ass when Naomi pushed him aside.

"Not funny, Dean." Sam scowled from the floor and Dean did a double take.

"You two a double act?" he asked with a grin, and Sam glared.

"No," came the simultaneous reply, and Dean looked them and chuckled before turning back to the piece of paper he had in front of him.

"What you got there?" Sam asked as he staggered slightly, attempting to get up off of the floor.

"Nothing." Dean sighed and tucked the paper back into his wallet, getting up from the bed and walking over to the little counter in the kitchenette and pouring himself a coffee.

"It's not nothing." Sam said gently sitting down on Naomi's seat and looking up at his brother, puppy-dog eyes shining at Dean. Shaking his head on a sigh, Dean leaned forward and pulled his wallet out of his pocket once more, handing Sam the thin sheet of paper. "That's hardly nothing," Sam whispered as he looked at Dean through his lashes.

"It's my son." Dean clenched his jaw as he watched Sam's face fall slightly at the words.

"How long until he's born?" Sam asked, swallowing back the bitterness that managed to push passed his hangover.

"Doc says Naomi's 28 weeks. So if everything goes well, he should make an appearance in 8 weeks." Dean smiled proudly at Sam.

"If you had known that Naomi would get pregnant, would you have made the deal?" Sam asked softly as he handed Dean back the ultra-sound photo.

"I dunno, maybe. She's world-class, I think she would be able to deal on her own. I just feel a hell of a lot safer knowing she won't have to do this alone, knowing she'll have you to look after her," Dean said honestly. Sam opened his mouth to speak when there was a loud knock at the door, and Dean's brow furrowed in confusion before he made his way over to the door.

Dean pulled the door open enough to see out, and he couldn't help the smile that split his face when he saw her. "Naomi will be so happy to see you," Dean declared, throwing open the door and letting the woman hug him as she made her way into the room.

"Naomi will be so happy to see…Oh my god!" Naomi screamed and ran into the other woman's arms, giggling and laughing uncontrollably, her voice nothing more than a high pitched squeal. Dean stood smiling as he looked on at Sam who was cradling his head in his hands but smiling all the same. "Sam, I don't think you've met Lola, have you?" Naomi asked when she finally regained her composure.

"Um, no, I haven't." Sam said unsurely with a proper smile, his dimples making him look that much younger, even as his mind was going into overdrive trying to figure out why she looked so damned familiar as he extended his hand.

"Screw that!" Lola exclaimed and pulled him into a hug, Sam hugged back on an "oof" as she squeezed the breath out of him, glaring as Dean looked on smugly. "Can you help me get my bags out of the car?" she asked, flashing him a mega-watt smile, and Sam just nodded mutely. Lola clapped her hands and skipped out to the car as Sam started to follow.

"Is she always this hyper?" Sam asked and Naomi giggled, making Sam groan in despair and flashing Naomi and Dean a look on the way out.

"You call her?" Naomi asked as she stepped over to Dean, sliding her arms around him and sighing against his chest when he wrapped his arms around her.

"I couldn't have you getting married without her here. Look, I know how much you gave up to be with me, Mimi, and don't think for one minute I don't appreciate it, 'cause I do. More then you'll ever know." He kissed her head, and she looked up at him with tears in her eyes.

"Who are you, and what have you done with my Dean?" she asked, one of her smiles in place.

"It's me…I just wanted you to know," he laughed nervously and she kissed him soundly on the lips.

"Well in that case, I don't regret it, Dean, and I would do it all over again in a heartbeat," she whispered against his lips before claiming them once again. Dean held her as close to him as physically possible, drinking her in before pulling back to gaze into the most beautiful blue eyes that he had ever seen in his life, and would ever see.

"I hope our son has your eyes," he stated simply, his hands trailing over her womb to feel the life beneath his hands.

"No way—my nose, my intelligence, a combination of our lips and skin tone but definitely _your_ eyes." She licked her lips and rested her arms on his shoulders.

"You haven't thought about this much, have you?" he laughed, his face breaking into the smile that she fell in love with.

"Nope. Not at all." she laughed again and pressed her lips to his, "I wish your dad was here to see this, Dean—he'd be so proud of you." She smiled sadly, her eyes welling up with tears. She watched Dean's jaw work silently as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Naomi brought her hand up to rest on Dean's as he leaned on her shoulder, and Dean smiled fondly when he caught sight of the soft skin at her wrist.

"What you smiling at?" Naomi whispered quietly, a small grin tugging at the corners of her lips, her voice almost drowned out by Sam's laughter and the high pitched squeal of "We know each other from college!" from whom they could only guess was Lola. Dean remained silent as he took her hand in his and turned it over to the paler, fleshier side of her arm and looked at her then down at the exposed skin there.

"Do you remember when you got his done?" he looked at her as his fingers traced a pattern up her arm.

"Considering it's my wrist, I think so." she smiled sweetly at him as he traced the letters on her wrist. Naomi had gotten the letters D, N, and W intertwined on her wrist, her left wrist to be exact. "I wanted it on my right wrist, so it wouldn't be hidden by my mother's watch, but the guy told me that the vein in that hand goes straight to your heart," she whispered again, and Dean locked eyes with her. Naomi's face crumpled, and Dean brought his hand up to her jaw and pulled her into his arms just as Sam walked through the door, followed by Lola, who had nothing with her.

"You okay, babe?" Lola asked softly, her hand stroking Naomi's hair.

"Yeah," Naomi nodded, turning in Dean's arms to look at Lola. "Where is your stuff?" she said tearfully, wiping at her eyes as Dean slowly loosened his grip on her.

"About that, it's not me who needs stuff, it's you." Lola smiled, and Naomi sighed.

"What did you do?" She placed her hands on her hips, not quite getting the reaction she'd hoped for when Lola began to laugh.

"I'm sorry, but there is no way I can take you seriously when you have a stomach the size of a bowling ball." Lola tried to reason with Naomi. "Just point me in the direction of your stuff, and I'll pack it for you."

"Why?" Naomi quizzed.

"Because you're getting married to the hottie with the body over there, and tradition says you can't see each other before the big day, or it's bad luck." Lola smiled gratefully when Sam handed her Naomi's bag and helped her to pack it.

"First of all, there is nothing traditional about this, and second of all, he's in the room, so don't objectify him," she said with a scowl. "Besides, it's too late—I woke up wrapped around him this morning. So yeah, looks like tomorrow will be a bust." Naomi crossed her arms over her bump, and Lola laughed again.

"Move it, lady. Besides, a certain person, seeing as I can't objectify him, pointed out that you don't have a dress yet. So you need one. And besides it's all organized, and even this little temper tantrum has been worked into the time table." Lola zipped up Naomi's bag as Naomi glared at her, then Dean, then Sam.

"I hate you all," she stated as she picked up her jacket, and threw it over her arm. "Make sure he doesn't get into trouble while I'm gone," she said to Sam as she made her way towards the door. "See you tomorrow." She smiled and placed a soft kiss against Dean's lips before turning back to Lola. "Come on, Sparky—I have a feeling I'm gonna need to hit someone before this days out." Naomi glared at Lola as she walked out of the room.

"Okay, everything's going according to plan—7 pm. Don't be late, or Bobby will kill you _or,_" an amused look washed over Lola's face, "they'll play poker to see who gets to kill you, and the wedding will be off," Lola warned seriously, as she set off after her friend.

* * *

Sam looked up at Dean and watched as Dean looked around the room, wetting his bottom lip and heading straight for the sharpening stone and the knife in his duffle.

"She'll be fine, Dean." Sam walked over as his brother sat down on the bed and began to oil the blade before pushing it along the block.

"S'not her I'm worried about," Dean admitted sheepishly, and Sam smirked.

"I thought you'd met Richard before?" Sam asked as he tried in vain not to laugh.

"Yeah I did, and he hasn't spoken to Naomi since. Her mom was nice. She liked me." Dean laughed slightly. "But he didn't think I was good enough for his daughter, and she told him that I was. And _he_ told _her_ that if I was in her life, he wouldn't be. So she said fine, and we left," Dean said, the regret obvious in his voice.

"But Dean, you called him last week. I thought it was all sorted."

"He's not coming for me," Dean said softly. "Or Naomi, for that matter." Dean looked down to the flip knife in his grip.

"The baby?" Sam asked quietly, and Dean nodded.

"I wish I could see his reaction when I die in four days." Dean half laughed at the thought. "I just want Naomi and him to make up before it happens, you know? She's gonna need him." Dean nodded and stood up, putting the knife and block back into the duffle. "Speaking of needs, I need breakfast. You coming?" he asked as he grabbed his jacket and pulled it on, reaching for the keys to the Impala. Sam sighed and swallowed, grabbing for his coat as he followed Dean out.

* * *

"I hate you, you know that?" Naomi glared at Lola as she walked into the five-star hotel behind her best friend. She hated how much she fit in here, how uncomfortable these places made her feel. They weren't Dean.

"How may I help you, miss?" the concierge at the front desk asked with a friendly smile, and Naomi's head snapped up with a surge of alarm at the sight of the woman's face. _Oh, God. _Naomi's heart raced. _Who _is_ she? Why is she always here?_ She plastered a fake smile on her face when she realized that the familiar old woman was waiting for a reply.

"Sorry, I was in a world of my own." Naomi smiled again, trying to push back the bad feeling she had about this.

"Are you the lucky bride-to-be?" The old woman asked again and Naomi smiled genuinely at her.

"Yeah, yeah."

"Okay, Mrs. Soon-to-be Winchester, your husband-to-be has you booked in room 409." The woman smiled and gave her the key, and Naomi could swear that she saw something flicker in those horrible grey eyes.

"Thanks!" Lola half-shouted back over her shoulder as she made her way to the elevator followed by a rather apprehensive Naomi. "Open the door!" Lola shouted when they reached the room. _If she didn__'__t have the bags here, she would be jumping up and down clapping her hands._ Naomi glared at the excitement that oozed out of Lola, but opened the door anyways, her jaw falling slightly as she walked into the room. The room was dotted with daisies and pink primroses, and on one of the queen-sized beds was a flowing beige dress with gold detail and straps. All of a sudden a glass of orange juice was being handed to her by a jeweled hand, and another woman was smiling from the other side of the door.

"Anna! Ellen!" Naomi exclaimed as her eyes filled with tears and her other best friend and Ellen walked over to hug her.

"Happy bachelorette party!" Anna laughed, her Californian lilt filling the room.

"Dean call you both, too?" Naomi asked as Lola placed the bags down and walked over to her friend.

"Dean organized this whole thing babe." Lola ran a hand up and down Naomi's back as she walked over to the bed and ran her fingers over the dress, and it was then and only then that Naomi couldn't hold back the tears anymore, suddenly overwhelmed by the feeling that something was wrong and the loss that hadn't even _happened_ yet. Her knees buckled, and she sat down abruptly on the bed, Ellen whispering that it would all be okay in her ear. But Naomi knew that it wouldn't be okay. _Nothing would ever be okay_ _when he was gone._

* * *

Sam walked into the bar in front of Dean and smiled widely at the three men sitting at the far away table.

"Hey, boys!" Bobby exclaimed, and Dean smiled. _So maybe I__'__m not the only one springing surprises, _he thought, nudging Sam in the back as he walked forward to hug the other man .

"Bobby, Joshua," Dean said, then did a double-take at the man who stood to greet him.

"Long time, no see, son." Joshua smiled widely at him, and Dean nodded, swallowing as he turned to face the last man at the table.

"Mr. Nichols," he regarded, slowly extending his hand to the older man who merely looked at him and sipped his whiskey again.

"What are you drinking, boys?" Bobby asked rubbing his hands together and Sam shook his head and stood.

"I got this one." Sam smiled down at Dean and made his way to the bar, scowling at the woman who walked up to serve him. "What the hell are you doing here?" Sam demanded, and the woman frowned back at him.

"You're taking your time, Sam. We need this done if you wanna save your brother from the fiery pits of hell," she bit out in a low voice, and Sam glared as she began to set the drinks on a tray.

"He's getting married tomorrow, okay? The day after, that's all I ask." Sam swallowed and handed over the money for the drinks as the woman nodded.

"The day after tomorrow, and no later," she settled, and Sam nodded, making his way back over to the table and the stony silence between Dean and Naomi's father. _This is going to be so much fun. _He sighed as he handed out the drinks, casting one quick look back over his shoulder before turning his attention to making the most out of what was likely to be a painfully awkward evening.

* * *

"Honestly Naomi, if you had come to me ten years ago and said, 'I'm gonna marry Dean and have his kid,' I woulda been locked up 'cause people woulda thought I was nuts," Anna stated, as she leaned forward from her position on the bed to look at Naomi.

"We weren't _that_ bad!" Naomi tried to defend the relationship, only to be met by the sound of laughter from her two best friends and a confused look from Ellen. "Dean and I didn't get along very well in the beginning," Naomi explained to Ellen, and Lola laughed harder, falling off of the bed in her attempt at stop laughing.

"Didn't get along very well, my ass!" she called from the floor causing the other three woman to laugh at her.

"Okay, we broke up and made up most of the time. It was mainly sex for the first few years." Naomi shrugged and Ellen raised her eyebrows.

"Years?" she asked shocked and Naomi giggled.

"Yeah, with the job he does, he's on the road a lot , and I was at college studying fashion and art. We didn't get a whole lot of time together, but in my last semester, he came to me and told me he was done playing games. I was either in or out." Naomi grinned at Ellen, and Anna sighed, laying back down on the bed.

"I can assure you that's not what happened with Bill and I." Ellen stated, and Naomi giggled, stretching out her legs over Lola, who was perched at the bottom of the bed.

"So you were the great romance of the stone ages, huh?" Naomi smirked playfully, and Ellen glared.

"It's easy to see why Dean fell for you, by the way," Ellen finished with a playful smirk of her own, and took a drink. "You know, I can't say a lot about how much you've changed his life, but I can say this: that time after you two had that huge fight last year and you told him to hit the road? He came by the Roadhouse, and I swear to you, he wasn't the same cocky son of a bitch as he usually was. He sat there all night, sulking in the corner. But by God did he shine when you took his sorry ass back." Ellen finished on a sigh, and Anna rolled her eyes, a chuckle escaping her mouth.

"Mimi, you do realize that you will be officially married as of tomorrow, right?" she asked as she sat up and Naomi smiled broadly.

"Yeah, and I'll be a mom in, like, eight weeks. Things are changing," Naomi warned, and Lola smiled.

"'Bout time though, I mean your dad had wanted you married off by the time you were twenty-four, didn't he? That you made it to twenty-nine before finally agreeing to tie the knot is impressive," Lola told her with a playful wink.

"Yeah, he made me debut, like, ten times. Mom thought he was crazy…I just wish he would accept Dean, and be here tomorrow. But we all know that won't happen. If mom was still here, she would have talked some sense into him by now." Naomi shrugged sadly, and Anna nodded.

"Still no contact, huh?"

"Nope. Four years. Well, he got sick about three years ago and I went to him and offered to put aside the grudge if he would, but he more or less told me the only way he would talk to me is if I got rid of Dean. Which I refused to do. Dean tried to speak to him, too, but he didn't want to hear it." Naomi looked up as the tears shone in her eyes, and Ellen stroked her cheek.

"Its okay sweetheart, he'll come around—daddies just want the best for their children. You're his only daughter—he's probably just feeling a bit startled and scared you're going to replace him," Ellen reasoned, and Naomi nodded, swallowing thickly._ Why am I letting this ruin my night, dammit? _

"Four years is a long time to harbor a grudge, and I don't see him giving up on this one. But I don't care! Dean has more than proved himself to me. I honestly wonder sometimes why he put up with me all those years ago." Naomi licked her lips and blinked back her tears.

"Because he loved you, even back then when you were a moody bitch." Lola smiled trying to lighten the mood.

"Well nothing's changed there then, now I'm a _pregnant _moody bitch," _Dean loves me and is always there for me even if my dad isn__'__t, and if he can__'__t show up tomorrow I__'__ll be damned if I let him ruin tonight, _she thought as she wiped at her eyes. "I'm also a _hungry_, _pregnant_ moody bitch, so where's the food?"

* * *

"So who all is here for Naomi tomorrow?" Richard asked after a few drinks had loosened him up a bit, and Bobby looked at Dean for an answer.

"Anna, Lola, and our mutual friend Ellen." Dean said, and Sam smiled at him, both brothers almost dying with shock when Richard began to chuckle. The four other men exchanged looks and Richard waved his hand.

"It's just Lola, that's all," he managed to get out through his laughter. "You do know that that's not her real name?" he asked finally. Dean smiled and shook his head. "Her name is Lois." Richard stated, leaving Dean with a look of confusion on his face.

"How do you get Lola from Lois?" Dean quizzed, causing Richard to laugh again.

"We were at a debutante ball—the girls must have been about 16 at the time—and Lois…" He paused, beset by laughter once again before he calmed enough to continue. "The poor girl was so nervous that she had something to drink. Now, understand, Naomi, on the other hand, didn't care. When her mother had first told her about the ball, she was more horrified than elated but she went along with it," Richard remembered, a familiar gleam in his eye when he spoke of his daughter. "Anyway, shortly after the fan dance, music began to filter through the speakers and Naomi burst into fits of laughter right there on-stage, in front of my colleagues. I wasn't happy about it—I was annoyed at her until, of course, I realized what she was laughing at. Lois was parading around…." Richard cracked up into fits of laughter, and Sam suddenly clicked as to how he knew the raven-haired girl, and it wasn't just from around campus.

"She had yellow feathers in her hair, didn't she? While that song was on?" Sam cracked up, and Dean began to laugh too, Joshua looked blankly at them and Sam let out a breath. "You have heard the song, "Copacabana" by Barry Manilow right?" he asked and Joshua shook his head. Bobby grinned and merely looked at Sam. "Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl, with yellow feathers in her hair and a dress way down to there…" Sam sang his explanation and Joshua began to laugh hysterically although it wasn't clear if he had clicked onto the joke, or he was simply laughing at Sam or the look of sheer horror on Dean's face.

"Hence the name Lola." Richard clarified. "It stuck. She didn't remember much about it the next day, but dear God, it was some debut." Richard wiped at his eyes, and Bobby smirked, shaking his head before turning to Dean with a serious expression.

"Look, I hate to break up or ruin the moment, but this is something I have to do while I'm still sober," he stated, raising a laugh from the rest of the table. "Dean, before your daddy died, he called me, left me a mail drop," Bobby began, and the smiled slowly faded from Dean's face. "So, I went and picked it up…It was a letter, with something inside it. I was told to hold onto it until something like this came up. 'Until you finally saw sense and married the girl,' I think were the exact words." Bobby took a breath as he fished around in his pocket and handed the small brown envelope to Dean.

"What is it?" Dean asked running his fingers along the length of the paper.

"Open it." Bobby commanded softly and Dean did as he was asked, a smile creeping onto his shocked features.

"It's--"

"Mom's wedding ring," Dean finished, holding the plain gold band in the palm of his hand. "You know he once said to me that Naomi was something special, that you have to grab onto things like that because they don't come around every day." Dean sighed softly and tucked the ring back into the envelope, handing it to Sam.

"And you're giving this to me because…?" Sam asked as he held the package in his hand.

"It's the best man's job to keep the ring," Dean said simply, and Sam smiled.

"Thank you."

"For what?" Dean asked Sam. "You really think I wouldn't want my pain in the ass little brother to be the best man at my wedding?" A playful smile lit up Dean's face, and Sam leaned forward earnestly. "Dean," he began, only to be cut off by Dean's raised hand.

"No chick flick moments!" Dean declared leaving Sam to lean back in his seat, chuckling as he did so.

"Dean." Richard's voice interrupted the playfulness, and Dean turned to face him reluctantly. "I was wrong about you. I'm not saying you are good enough for my daughter, as no man will ever be, but you've proved your worth. Just don't break her heart," Richard warned, and Dean smiled to conceal the pain at those words.

"I won't, sir." Dean nodded, and Richard broke into a sudden smile.

"Well in that case, bring on the shots," Richard announced and Dean was sure his jaw had left a massive dent in the table where it had hit when those words came out of the older man's mouth. Sam, Joshua and Bobby laughed at Dean's expression. "Come now, a man has to be able to loosen up on occasion." Richard smiled and Dean found himself laughing along with his friends, much to the woman at the bar's annoyance.

* * *

"Poor girl." Anna sighed as they listened to Naomi retch in the bathroom.

"Remind me never to have kids," Lola spoke from the bed, and Ellen laughed.

"Morning sickness comes and goes, sweetheart. I didn't have much at all when I was pregnant with Jo," Ellen said as she shrugged and continued to paint her nails. Naomi came out of the bathroom unsteadily and sat back down on the chair in front of Anna who carried on pulling her hair into an up do, leaving her fringe and a few loose strands of hair at her nape to be curled later.

"Ellen?" Naomi called, and Ellen looked over at her as Lola rushed around with pins and brushes, make-up, and false tan. "Can you do something for me?" Naomi asked, and Ellen nodded, getting up off of the bed and walking over to the dressing table.

"Yeah, sure, honey—what do you need?" Ellen smiled as Naomi slipped her hand into the velvet pouch sitting next to her and handed her a broach.

"My mom bought that when I was a kid…we were out shopping and I saw it…she told me that it was too fancy for everyday wear, that it was the sort of thing one would wear only for weddings and such." She paused, eyes dropping to the velvet pouch that she was playing with as her mother's voice echoed in her mind, snapping back to reality she looked at Ellen again. "So I asked her to get it and wear it to mine, but…well, she's not here…so I was wondering if you would be my mom for the day?" Naomi looked up shyly at Ellen who smiled back at her, eyes full of pride.

"Of course I will, sweetie." she kissed the top of Naomi's head and took the sterling silver broach from her.

"Okay enough soppiness—I'll die before we get to the wedding! Now if you're through with all of the throwing up and the drama, it's time to get into your dress!" Lola commanded and Naomi rolled her eyes.

"The church is like a five-minute drive away—we're hardly going to be late," Naomi retorted, running the mascara over her eyelashes again.

"I know, but I want this to be perfect—you deserve it!" Lola yelled, pouting from the doorway of the bathroom as Naomi broke into a smile.

"Dude. Now who's being soppy?" Naomi cocked her eyebrow and Lola glared as the other two women struggled to contain their laughter.

"I hate you." Lola sighed and closed the bathroom door, her laugh audible from the other side.

* * *

"Dean, come on, already," Sam called as he straightened his tie, Bobby was sitting on the bed next to Richard who, even though Dean had told him the next surprise on his list, insisted on a tux.

"Man, I look like one of the Blues Brothers," Dean said with a sigh as he came out of the bathroom.

"Your dad would have been proud, son," Joshua said from the doorway, and Dean nodded curtly a mumbled "thanks" passing his lips as he fingered the knot of his tie.

"Does anyone know if she knows?" Dean asked as he tried to get his tie straight only to have Sam smack his hand away and fix it in one go.

"Relax. For the last time, she doesn't know," Bobby reassured him from the bed, "but I hear she was worried about you last night." Bobby turned to look at Richard who stopped straightening his cuffs. "And she was wanting _you_ to be here," he told the other man, and Richard stood from the bed.

"Well I will," he replied, donning his coat as he walked out of the door.

"Let's just go—the sooner we get there, the sooner we come back, and I can get this damned thing off," Dean stood and straightened himself out and made for the door.

"Looks like you're getting married now, big brother," Sam laughed, clapping his brother on the back as, together, they walked out of the room.

* * *

"Uh, Ellen, the church is the other way," Naomi stated in growing alarm.

"That's a one-way street, honey—have to go this way." Ellen smiled, and Naomi frowned, her eyes narrowing in suspicion. _Been in this town two weeks, and that was never a one-way. _Naomi sighed and looked out of the window. That old woman was bothering her, but the thing that scared her the most was Dean not showing up at all.

"Do you think he'll show?" she asked out loud, scared for the reply.

"Of course he'll show!" Lola all but exclaimed from the back seat, and Naomi turned to face her.

"You don't know him like I do—things like this weird him out." Naomi swallowed around the fear in her throat and turned back in her seat. "Ellen, you missed the turn."

"Did I?" Ellen asked casually as she continued up the road, getting further and further out from the city.

"Alright, that's it! Where are we going?" Naomi demanded and was met by silence, which angered her more until Ellen stopped the car at the bottom of a hill, a hill that Dean and Naomi had come to a few nights ago, and suddenly everything fell into place. Bobby walked down to her and she smiled at him as he opened the car door for her and helped her out.

"You look beautiful, sweetheart." Bobby said cheerfully and kissed her cheek.

"Thanks, _Dad_," she laughed and Ellen winked at him over Naomi's head.

"Oh, I'm not here to escort you, I'm here for Ellen," Bobby clarified, and a horrified look washed over Naomi's face.

"Who's going to give me away?" she all but screamed.

"I will, if you'll have me." The familiar voice made Naomi's body freeze, and as she slowly turned around, she couldn't help the smile that washed over her face.

"Daddy!" She ran into his arms, all anger and pain pushed aside for the day. _It doesn__'__t matter today. We can talk about it later._

"Sweetheart, about everything I said..." Richard began, but Naomi shook her head in protest.,

"No, Dad, not today," she pleaded softly, and her father bent his arm allowing her to slip her arm through his, her hand nestled in the crook of his elbow.

Sam watched as Dean rocked back and forth on his heels. "You can still back out, Dean," Sam said teasingly, and Dean glared back at him.

"No way, man. Naomi deserves better than that, a lot better…I just wish she would hurry up, so I could get out of this suit," he said as he fiddled with his tie for what seemed like the hundredth time.

"Well, twenty minutes—fast ceremony—then you can take her back to wherever and get that suit off. Although by the looks of things, I'd say she likes you in a suit." Sam broke into a smile as Dean turned around to see Naomi walking up the little hill, her arm linked with her dad's and a massive smile spilling over her face. Dean's eyes fell to the high gold waistline that encircled her body, perfectly accentuating the low cut and the floating nature of the dress over a certain bump that Dean couldn't keep his hands off of lately, the beauty of her making him smile back.

"Keep up the good work," Richard joked as he stopped in front of the priest—an old friend of Bobby's—and placed his daughter's hand in Dean's.

As Dean took Naomi's right hand in his, he swallowed hard, trying to still the shaking of his hands as the priest's voice seemed to drone on and on distantly. But when Naomi tightened her hand on his, he swallowed again, realizing that it was his turn to speak now. _Oh shit…here goes nothing..._

"I, Dean Winchester , take you, Naomi Isabella Nichols, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy law. In the presence of God, I make this vow."

Naomi felt the tears well up in her eyes as his words echoed in her ears. _Four days_, was the mantra that bounced about in her head as she took hold of Dean's hand. _Don't let go,_ she pleaded silently, gripping tighter onto him as though if she didn't let go, nothing could take him from her. _Never_, he assured her with his eyes, his thumb stroking over the soft skin of her hand, whichallowed her to, in turn make her vow to him.

"I, Naomi Isabella Nichols, take you, Dean Winchester , to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, cherish, and obey, till death us do part, according to God's holy law. In the presence of God, I make this vow."

A tear slipped down Naomi's cheek, which Dean gently wiped away, his silent way of saying, _Everything's gonna be fine. _Naomi let him reassure her, let herself fall into the belief that everything would be okay, just this once. This would be her memory, Dean's legacy, the moment she would tell their son about as often as he wanted to hear it. Naomi smiled at Dean as the priest looked at her and asked if she was ready to continue. "Yes, Father. And hurry it up—Dean doesn't like suits." She smiled and Dean shook his head.

_Yeah,_ he thought, _this one is definitely mine._

* * *

"So," Richard said as he stood in the bar of the hotel, clearing his throat to get the small crowd's attention. "Traditionally, there are speeches at a wedding, and well, I know this isn't the most traditional of weddings, but I feel this is something I have to say, and I would rather it be in front of you all."

Naomi turned to face her father, suddenly interested in what he had to say. "What do you think he's gonna say?" Dean whispered to Sam as everyone gathered around.

"I dunno, but I think you should be with your wife right now," Sam whispered back, and Dean nodded, making his way to the front of the little group, taking a deep breath when Naomi got up to give him the seat before she settled back down on his lap.

"Four years ago, my daughter brought this man home to me and introduced him to me as her boyfriend." He paused, and Dean threaded his fingers through Naomi's hand, resting his other hand on her bump. _Where the hell is he going with this?_ "She told me she was seeing him, that they were in love. I dismissed the idea, he was out of her league, too rough around the edges for my liking. In my rage that she was lowering her standards, I failed to notice the one thing that mattered, the one thing that every father wants for their child…Dean loved her, treated her like the princess she was. I just refused to see that. And it almost cost me my daughter and my marriage…I told Naomi that she had to choose: me or Dean. And I never thought, never, that she would stand up and take his hand and say those two words that broke my heart. When my baby girl said good bye to me as she held his hand, I hated him. But when he called me when I was ill, it startled the ball rolling for me to realise that he wasn't the jerk I had him pinned as. And when he called me and told me that my daughter was carrying his child and they were getting married, the last of the resentment melted away. When he invited me to be here today, I couldn't believe it."

Naomi turned and kissed Dean soundly on the lips, a broad smile on her face as she snuggled into him. "When someone can make my daughter smile like that, they get my approval. I just wish your mother was here to see you, princess." Richard swallowed back tears as his little girl stood up and wrapped her arms around him.

"Me, too, Dad, but she's watching—I know it. And that was a long way for a short cut to saying sorry, Dad." Naomi laughed and looked over at Dean and Sam who seemed to be preoccupied with something.

"Are you two gonna dance?" Anna asked hopefully, a grin on her face and a CD in her hand.

"I'm seven months pregnant, Dean hates dancing and suits, so I'm gonna get him home and let him get changed." Naomi smiled and Joshua let a loud whistle causing the room to erupt into laughter.

"I think I can suffer a little longer, go on," Dean urged, sending her on her way with a kiss. Naomi rolled her eyes and took her father's hand, maneuvering though the tables onto the dance floor.

Anna raced up to where the music were and frowned slightly, jumping out of her skin when Sam came up behind her. "Problem?" he asked, and Anna nodded.

"They don't have a CD player, just the band," she gestured, dragging her fingers through her hair.

"What song is it anyways?" Sam quizzed.

"'Daddy's Little Girl.' The Michael Bublé version." She turned away from Sam and looked at the singer who was making his way toward them.

"Listen, I heard you have a problem and the song you I have don't know but there is another one I know…" he trailed off, and Anna beamed at him.

"Is there a problem?" Naomi called, _Maybe Lola was right, maybe it _is_ bad luck to see the person you__'__re marrying the day before the wedding._

"NO!" Anna called excitedly and Sam chuckled.

The introduction of Bob Carlisle's "Butterfly Kisses" filled the room, and Naomi took her dad's hand, swaying along with him.

"Thank you, Dad. You didn't have to say all of that—it means a lot that you did, means more than you'll ever know," she murmured, choking out a laugh through her tears.

"I meant every word, sweetheart. These past few years have been hell, and I'm annoyed that you got everything from your mother, and only stubbornness from me," he joked as she rested her head on his shoulder.

Dean couldn't believe the tears that were crowding his eyes and he tried to blink them away. _Come on Dean! This is so chick flick-ish! Sam would be so proud. If I cry now, Sam__'__ll never let me live this down, _he thought as he cleared his throat.

"You did it Dean," Sam observed as he handed Dean a beer. "You got them back together."

"Yeah I know." Dean smiled happily and after a moment he turned to growl playfully at Sam, "I can't believe you even doubted me. Dude, I'm offended." Dean shook his head before taking a swig of his beer. Sam burst into fits of laughter. _Only Dean would turn this into a joke. _He smiled fondly before both boys took another swig of beer simultaneously.

Richard smiled against Naomi's head as he listened to the verse, realizing its true meaning. "I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl," he sang against her head, and she leaned back to look into his face.

"Daddy, don't cry," she said with a giggle, wiping away the fallen tear from her dad's cheek. "I'm always gonna be your princess, Dad, I promise, but you have to understand that I'm Dean's wife now. And besides, you're gonna have your hands full helping me to raise your grandson." Her eyes sparkled as she smoothed out her father's lapels.

"Grandson?" Richard questioned, eyes filled with pride.

"Yeah, I'm having a boy. Just don't make him go into the family business when he's like five—he won't forgive you for it." She laughed, her head tilted back and kissed her dad's cheek as the song ended. "I love you, Dad," she whispered as she felt Dean's hand run down the curve of her spine.

"I love you too, Princess, but so does he. And apparently he hates suits," he said with a smile. "So go on now, and see to your husband. I'm going to call it a night anyway" Richard kissed the side of Naomi's head. "Dean." he said and Dean looked up.

"Night, Mr. Nichols." Dean smirked and Richard nodded, once again simply staring at Dean's out stretched hand, before enveloping him in a hug.

"Night, Dean. And it's Richard," he said mildly as he turned to leave.

"Yes, sir." Dean agreed, watching him go before he turned to Naomi with an impish grin. "Do you think he'd let me call him 'Dick'?"

* * *

"Night," Naomi and Dean called as they walked out of the hotel, Naomi shivering at the cold. Dean smirked and pulled his jacket off, draping it over her shoulders as he pulled her closer to him. Naomi rested her head on his shoulder as they walked in a comfortable silence back to the motel. Rounding the corner at the motel, Dean stopped her and told her to wait there. So, she did as she was told and stopped and waited. And waited. And waited, until she couldn't wait any longer. With an irritated huff, she rounded the corner, coming to a sudden stop at the sight of Dean leaning against the Impala, arms crossed and a smug look on his face. Naomi crinkled her brow in confusion and as she drew closer, Dean leaned back into the car and switched on the radio, the soft strains of Saliva's "Here with You" filling the empty air of the parking lot. Dean held out his hand, and Naomi laughed.

"Dean, you _hate_ dancing, and you hate suits—come on inside and get changed," she reasoned but he shook his head, easing his coat off of her shoulders and draping it over the open window.

"Yeah, so take advantage of the moment while you can, 'cause for damn sure it'll never happen again," he joked, looking down at her with a tender smile as she stepped into his arms. "Me spending the entire day in a suit and my actions for the next few minutes are entirely for you, and _only _you_. _And I should probably tell you that today was the best day of my life, even including the soppy chick flick moments. I fully understand now why many people only get married once." He smiled gently as he pulled her closer to him, his arms resting on her hips and lower back. Naomi couldn't help but smile back as she swayed along with him in the parking lot, the two of them alone, to some angsty rock song, at midnight. _Only he could take something so traditional and make it something so...different …so…Dean. The term "More than just a pretty face" was coined for him. And God do I love him all the more for it. ._

"You're mine, Winchester," she growled low into his ear, relishing the little shudder of pleasure she elicited from him.

"Yeah, well, Naomi Isabella Winchester, you are mine." Dean kissed her lips softly as her hands found their way into his hair, and they continued to sway.

Sam watched from the corner of the motel, tears stinging his eyes while he watched his brother rest his head against Naomi's as the song ended before locking up the car and taking her hand, leading her into the motel.

"You have until midnight tomorrow." The voice startled Sam and he turned around to see the old woman staring back at him from the darkness.

"Midnight?" Sam asked, "Who do you think I am, Cinderella?" Sam tried his best to smirk but he knew it wouldn't work.

"You know, even Dean didn't pull that one." The woman smiled coldly as she made her way towards him. "Midnight, Sam," she breathed, and Sam pulled away, closing his eyes only to open them a moment later to find himself in the middle of the street alone.

He had twenty-four hours to make it up to Dean, and prepare him for what was going to happen.


	20. One More Fall On The Horizon

**A/N: **Okay peeps, this is where it all comes to a head! Sorry i took a while, but I wanted this chapter perfect!

Anways, massive huge thanks to the amazing Camlann, who not only beta's for me, spends AGES going over it with me and helping me make this as good as it is for you guys!

So yeah, this chapter is for her!

Sit back, relax and enjoy!

K

xox

* * *

Naomi yawned as she turned onto her side, only to be met with the broad expanse of her husband's chest. _Husband? Jesus. _a few times and pressed her palm to Dean's chest to get him to move. Groaning loudly, Dean rolled onto his back and stared up at her through sleepy eyes, smirking at the little laugh she let out.

"What's so funny?" he asked, pushing himself up onto his elbows.

"You," she stated simply, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips before turning away from him and placing her feet on the floor with the grace only a pregnant woman could possess.

"How am I funny?" he asked on a yawn. Naomi turned and raised her eyebrow pointedly at him. "What?" He laughed as he lay back down.

"Bad-ass demon hunter, my ass." She giggled as she pulled on the shirt he wore the night before. "Dude. This barely fits over my stomach. I'm so fat," Naomi complained miserably, and Dean sprang onto his knees, pulling her back against his chest.

"You're not fat," Dean reassured her.

"My ass has gotten bigger," she whined.

"Never noticed," He retorted, resting his chin on her shoulder.

"And my hips are so wide it's a wonder I can fit through the door." Naomi leaned her head against his as her fingers drummed out a beat against his arm.

"Never noticed."

"My thighs rival tree trunks."

"They do not." Dean lowered one arm enough to give her thigh a playful slap.

"My boobs have gotten bigger." Naomi said with a slight pout.

"Ne- yeah, I noticed that." Dean said, goofy smirk plastered on his face.

"Thought you might have, Anyways, we have to get up and get ready—we have the scan at three and if we're meeting Sammy for lunch, we have to get a move on." Naomi patted him on the arm, a signal for him to let go but Dean didn't seem to notice. .

"But do we have to get up? Come _on_,ten more minutes!" He tried to sweeten the deal, pressing open mouthed kisses along her jaw line. Naomi squirmed helplessly in his grasp, giggling when his hand began to run up and down her sides.

"Dean, enough! It's half past twelve—your ten more minutes started two hours ago." She grasped his hands in hers when she finally managed to get out of his arms to face him. Dean gave her his best bedroom eyes, and Naomi shook her head. "No, Dean!" She tried to let go of his hands only to sight when he tightened his grip and refused to let go. "Is that all you think about?" she asked playfully as he kissed the tip of her nose and wrapped his arms securely around her again.

Dean looked thoughtful for a moment before a smile lit up his face. "Yeah, pretty much," he replied with a nod, causing Naomi to laugh. "Especially when _my _wife is wearing _my _shirt, and we have a motel room _all to ourselves_." Dean smirked and placed a kiss to her lips, his left hand coming up to cradle her head, while his right kept her firmly against him.

"Well, who else's wife would you be excited about?" Naomi said, mock anger in her voice.

"Considering you're the only one here right now, guess it has to be you." Dean shrugged, and Naomi slapped him on the shoulder playfully.

"Ugh! You're such an ass Dean." She sighed, resting her hands on his neck.

"But you love me." He breathed against her shoulder, his eyes looking to hers.

"Yeah, unfortunately for me, I do." She sighed softly and placed a soft kiss in his hair. Dean opened his mouth to say something, but a knock at the door distracted him. "Saved by the door," Naomi laughed and moved towards the bathroom as Dean pulled the sheet around him and walked to the door.

"Hey, Sammy," Dean announced with a grin before looking around the room for his duffel.

"You have a good time last night?" Sam asked, a wide grin splitting his face.

"Like you even had to ask!" Dean winked and Sam screwed his face up.

"Dean!" Naomi scolded from the doorway of the bathroom, toothbrush in hand.

"What, Princess?" he asked innocently, causing her to sigh and return to the bathroom.

"So, it's now lunch we're going for?" Sam laughed.

"At the rate she's going?" Dean raised an eyebrow at Sam. "It'll be breakfast _tomorrow._" He smirked.

"Shut up Dean, I heard that!" Naomi yelled, making both boys burst into laughter.

* * *

"So you really didn't even think something was up yesterday?" Sam asked as he tucked into his cheese burger.

"No, I honestly thought it would be some quickie wedding somewhere." Naomi shrugged.

"You thought I'd do that to you?" Dean raised an eyebrow at her.

"Not intentionally no, but I know how much you hate things like that…I'm not being ungrateful. But to be honest, I didn't care where we got married, what I wore, or how many people were there. As long as you showed up, that's all I cared about." Naomi took a sip of her water and Dean looked at her for a while before a contented smile passed across his face.

"Where did you go last night?" Dean asked Sam, his mouth full of fries.

"Um, I stayed at the hotel, pity to get a room and not use it." Sam explained.

"But Lola and Anna were in that room…actually I made Lola go with Ellen, which means you spent the night with Anna! Sam!" Naomi began to giggle playfully.

"No, I slept in your bed. She slept in hers. Nothing happened." Sam defended, his face turning a new shade of red. Naomi continued to laugh into her water and Dean smiled at Sam.

"Did you or didn't you screw—oh, wait, sorry—Sammy doesn't _screw_ girls, he _makes love_ to them…" Dean fluttered his eyelashes only to be punched by both Naomi and Sam. "Ow!" he rubbed both his arms before Naomi snuggled up to him.

"You guys have an appointment today, don't you?" Sam asked, and Naomi nodded.

"I get to see him move!" Dean smirked, and Naomi sighed.

"I have to put up with _that_." She shook her head, "At least I'm prepared for motherhood, if he's anything like Dean," she joked and Dean's smiled broadened.

"He'll be an awesome kid if he's anything like Dean," Sam smiled and Dean raised an eyebrow.

"Sam, what are you playin' at? I've already said you can have the car when I'm gone." Dean asked, both serious and playfully at the same time.

"Very funny, I'm trying to be nice to you, and anyways you guys have to go, it's after two, and it could take you an hour to get into the city," Sam reasoned, and Dean stood up helping Naomi out of the booth.

"You sure you're okay?" Dean asked, big brother tone in his voice.

"Yes, now go! I expect a picture of my nephew when you get back!" Sam smirked and Dean nodded taking Naomi's hand as they walked out of the diner.

_Something is seriously eating him, but I'll be damned if I can figure out what the hell it is._

* * *

The waiting room buzzed with conversation and excited voices, causing Naomi to roll her eyes and pick up the nearest magazine, which, surprise, surprise, was a parenting magazine. Out of the corner or her eye, Naomi watched a couple talking quietly nearby. The woman was heavily pregnant -about seven or eight months along, Naomi guessed- and she was snuggled up against her husband, his arm around her and her body neatly fitting against his as they flipped through a baby name book, animatedly discussing what their newborn was going to be called. _Wonder if Dean and I will have that discussion over the next few days... _She thought to herself and immediately wished she hadn't, as tears began to blur the words together on the page. "Sh--," she stopped herself mid-curse and quietly dabbed at her eyes.

"Are you okay,?" a voice asked and Naomi looked up to see a plump woman in her late thirties smiling back at her and offering her a tissue.

"Yeah, just hormones," she half-joked, pasting a fake smile on her face as she took the tissue gratefully and dabbed at her eyes.. _God I wish it was._

"Must be hard going through this alone, glad I have my husband to support me." The woman spoke again and Naomi shook her head. .

"Oh no, no, I'm not alone. My husband is over there getting coffee." She grinned as she noticed the nurses walking by and checking him out, only to be met with his consolation smile. Yes, Naomi could tell the difference. A smile for her and another smile for any other girl who tried to get his attention.

"That's your husband?" The woman seemed shocked before her facial features softened. "Wait, who am I kidding? Gorgeous girl like you―how could I possibly think he belonged to anyone else?" The woman let out a laugh, and Naomi chuckled politely.

"Yeah, well, some people are just lucky to find the right guy, you know?" Naomi was glad of the conversation, anything to be normal for five minutes and not have the fear of hell hounds bounding in and ripping him to shreds in front of your own eyes.

"Yes, we _are_ lucky." The woman agreed. "So is this your first child?"

"Yeah, my first and probably my only," Naomi joked, prompting a laugh from the woman.

"That's what I thought, but this is my fourth." She smiled fondly when a sandy haired man strode towards her trailing two kids behind him. "Well, looks like that's me. Good luck with the baby." The woman smiled and placed a gentle hand on Naomi's shoulder.

"Thanks! You, too!" Naomi called as she watched the woman waddle off down the corridor, the children mumbling about being bored. Naomi sighed and turned back to the magazine, needing something else to distract her from the thought that she would, in fact, be doing this alone.

"Mrs. Winchester." The nurse smiled out into the waiting room and Naomi sighed, flicking through the pages of the magazine. "Mrs. Winchester," the nurse called again.

_For God's sake, I wish who ever she was shouting on would move their ass and go already, I mean come on who wouldn't be able to get the fact that they're being shouted on? Idiots. _

Dean let out a loud laugh as he turned around and saw Naomi sitting there doing absolutely nothing, realizing that she wasn't, in fact, ignoring the nurse…more like she simply didn't realize that it was _her_ the nurse was calling. Walking over to Naomi from the coffee vending machine, Dean nodded to get the nurse's attention before pointing Naomi out to her. Giggling a little, the nurse nodded in acknowledgment and waited for him to gain Naomi's attention. Dean sauntered over to where Naomi was sitting and leaned over her chair.

"Mrs. Winchester." Dean's deep voice rumbled in Naomi's ear causing her to jump and drop the magazine onto her lap.

"Jesus Christ, Dean!" she yelled, turning to smack him over the head with one hand while the other said firmly on her lap.

"Don't do that—it's classified as assault in the real world, sweetheart, and we're in a public place." Dean caught her hand easily and smirked against her cheek. "Besides, the nurse has been calling you for five minutes." Dean stated matter-of-factly and Naomi threw him a look.

"No, she's been calling Mrs. Winches…." Naomi tried off with a sheepish look and got to her feet, glaring at the smug smile currently on Dean's face. "Shut up," she snapped and walked over to the nurse as Dean followed, laughing before unconsciously tightening his grip around the cup.

The nurse led them down the corridor and into a small room where the ultrasound equipment was already set up, and Dean tried to control the shudder that ran through his body. Places like these were so _clinical _and _white_, and they smelled funny. Swallowing hard, he settled against the wall at the door and took Naomi's jacket as she stood in the doorway, unsure whether or not to see if Dean was okay or go and sit on the bed.

_This is so wrong, _he thought as he took a drink of his coffee, _and drinking this coffee is like pouring hot, freaking sludge down my throat, _Dean inwardly complained as he watched the nurse put Naomi's file down onto the little table and walk over to the other counter.

"You okay?" Naomi asked him softly, running her hand up and down his bicep, and he smirked at her, swallowing around the "It's a hospital―I don't like them," the "I'm dying in three days," and the "I'm so freaking scared right now, how can I possibly be okay!?" to deliver a simple and very unconvincing "Yeah."

Naomi sighed slightly and leaned forward, placing a quick kiss on his lips and giving his arm a reassuring pat. "Where do you want me?" She asked the nurse and glared at Dean when he chuckled and winked pointing to the bathroom cubicle.

"If you would just lay down on the bed, please, and roll up your top." The nurse smiled as she set about preparing the gel, a movement which Dean was tracking as Naomi complied with the nurse's request and lay down on the bed, pulling her light flowing top up over her stomach to rest below her bra.

"Sorry for not answering straight away," Naomi told her sheepishly. "We just got married yesterday, and I'm still not used to the name." Naomi gave an embarrassed smile at the words, but the nurse simply waved her hand as she made her way back over to Naomi and stood beside her, rubbing the gel in between her palms to try and warm it up.

"It's fine―don't worry about it. When I first got married all those years ago, I kept waiting for my mother-in-law to appear. Now, this may be a bit cold." The nurse warned, and Naomi laughed as the coldness of the gel came into contact with her warm skin. "Congratulations." the nurse spoke.

"Thanks," Dean answered from the other side of the room, his eyes glued to the nurse's ministrations, and as she picked up something that resembled roll-on deodorant, Dean couldn't help himself. "What's that?" he asked, taking another gulp of his coffee and fighting the urge to pull a face.

"This?" The nurse asked before holding up the piece of equipment and Dean nodded, confusion spreading over his face when Naomi bit onto her bottom lip to stop herself from laughing. "It's a transducer probe."

"It's a what?" Dean asked as his eyebrows shot up into his hairline. Naomi laughed loudly as Dean stared at the nurse in disbelief.

"A transducer probe," the nurse repeated, and Dean looked pensive for a moment.

"Dean, do not even say it!" Naomi commanded as she pushed herself up onto her elbows.

"Dude. I have to." Dean pleaded and Naomi rolled her eyes.

"I apologize in advance for my husband and the next sentence that comes out of his mouth." Naomi babbled before Dean could even speak earning herself a worried look from the nurse.

"Sounds like something that would happen to you if we got attacked by some of those nasty aliens!" Naomi burst out laughing again at the look on Dean's face: he looked like a five-year-old who had discovered a massive secret. The nurse tried hard to keep a straight face but was failing miserably.

"In all my twenty years in this job, I've never heard that one before." A small chuckle escaped her lips as she sat down on the stool and placed the probe onto the mass of gel on Naomi's abdomen.

"Okay, Dean, please shut up―I had to fill my bladder for this, and I really need to pee. Please hurry this up." Naomi looked pleadingly at the nurse who looked as though she was about to dissolve into giggles.

Dean swallowed hard when he saw Naomi's fingers twitch nervously on the bed beside her. For the first time, Dean began to truly appreciate what his dad had gone through when he was with them after he had made _his_ deal with the devil. _Losing her would be losing a massive part of me. God. What have I done to her?_ Dean blinked against the tears in his eyes at the sudden thought of what his going to hell actually meant for his wife. _Wife, Jesus._ Dean thought, dragging his hand down his face.

The nurse grinned at her as she ran the scanner over her abdomen, and a bright smile lit up her face. "Baby's doing fine. Do you want to have a look?" she asked sweetly looking from Naomi to Dean.

"Yeah," Naomi nodded and held out her hand to Dean who was practically attached to the wall next to the door. "Come here, baby," she encouraged. Dean took a deep breath and pushed away from the wall, making his way over to her and placing the coffee cup on the bed side table, slipping his fingers through hers as he sat down on the seat that was there. The nurse turned the monitor to allow them to see their child kicking and moving on the screen.

"That's…"Dean began and Naomi turned to look at him, his green eyes sparkling against the monitor as a proud smile spread across his face. "We did that," he said quietly, and Naomi chuckled.

"Yeah, Dean, we did." _God, what is it with me and tears, damn it! _she thought as her eyes filled. Naomi let out a shaky breath and Dean tightened his grip on her hand.

"Would you like to hear your baby's heartbeat?" the nurse piped up, breaking the moment, and Dean's eyes widened slightly.

"You can hear his heartbeat? While he's still in there?" Trying to shake the look of awe from his face wasn't the easiest of tasks, but when the sound of his unborn son's heartbeat filled the room, it was damn near impossible.

Naomi watched in contented silence as the amazement spread across Dean's face. She knew, deep down, that he would never hold his son, never hear his son take his first breath. He would never hear his son's first words or see his son's first steps. Dean would be gone. _That__'__s why I brought him today, _she remembered sadly, letting go of Dean's hand to instead reach up and cup his face. Her hand slipped from his jaw and down his neck to rest upon his chest. Dean's strong steady heartbeat and their son's little racing heart had Naomi smiling a watery smile as her fingers clenched in the fabric of his t-shirt fiercely, clinging to him as though the simple action could keep him with her.

Dean smiled down at her and placed his hand over hers, his fingers running over the gold band she had on her left hand. "I love you," he whispered, and Naomi nodded, tears falling from her face as the nurse smiled and walked out side of the room to give them some privacy.

"I love you, too, Dean," Naomi sobbed and Dean leaned up, gently cradling her to him. Dean was at a loss for words, he didn't know how to fix this. Dean would have gave anything for her not to hurt but then again, he would go back and make the same decision where Sam was concerned all over again.

* * *

Sam paced the motel room, wondering what on earth he was going to say to Dean. How was he going to explain something like this to his brother? Sam sighed and sat down at the foot of the bed with a groan. _Hell, I flipped out the day I tried to tell him that I was leaving to go to Stanford… _

The weather is shit in Mississippi_, Sam decided as he peeled his sweat-soaked shirt off of his body as he walked away from the open motel room door, holding the brown envelope in his grasp. This was his all-or-nothing. His one shot. His one-way ticket to life. Taking a deep breath, he opened the envelope and pulled out the contents. He closed his eyes and swallowed hard before his eyes opened and skimmed over the writing on the page. "YES!" Sam exclaimed happily to the empty room, his heart sinking slightly when the familiar roar of the Impala__'__s engine interrupted the echo of his voice. _

_"__Okay, princess," Dean laughed from the open car window when he pulled up into the parking space in front of the room. "I heard that over "You Shook Me all Night Long," which I shall ignore the irony of," Dean began to laugh again, allowing the guilt Sam was feeling to move abruptly from the pit of his stomach to his throat, trying to choke him to death. "So, where__'__s the girl?" Dean asked, the patented Dean Winchester smirk on his face as he got out of the car. _

_"__What girl?" Sam asked around the massive lump in his throat._

_"__The girl that made you yell like that?" Dean__'__s rich laughter bubbled through the thick air and Sam swallowed._

_"Wasn't a…um." The icy rivets of sweat that were pouring down his back and pooling at the base of his spine was making concentrating difficult._

_"__Sammy, what__'__s wrong? You okay?" Dean asked, playfulness gone and concern shining from his face as he reached out to Sam, placing his hand on his shoulder. Sam nodded pitifully, the sharp stab of guilt and self-hatred making his whole body tingle. Of course he didn__'__t hate Dean—how could he possibly hate the one person who would give up his life for him at the drop of a hat?_

_"I got into Stanford," Sam blurted out all at once. "Full ride." His eyes fell to his feet as silence fell upon the brothers._

_"__That__'__s…that__'__s great Sammy__―__I__'__m real proud of you." Dean bit out, and Sam raised his eyes to meet his brother's. "You__'__re not gonna go, though, right?" Dean asked, the hesitant smile on his face contradicted by the tears in his eyes. Sam__'__s eyes fell sadly back down the ground. _

_"__I__'__m obviously gonna graduate. Then go…" Sam said in a small voice, and Dean patted his shoulder._

_"__Yeah, yeah, you should." Dean cleared his throat and Sam looked up at him. _

_"__Dean, I__'__m sorry…you know it__'__s not this family I__'__m leaving__―__just this gig, man. I mean, as much as I moan about it, I love you and Dad." Sam didn__'__t know why, but he felt a massive need to give Dean an explanation__―_hell, he deserves that, at least_. Sam couldn__'__t stop the tears as they began to run down his face, and he couldn__'__t stop the guilt that began to rip through him when Dean wrapped his arms around him. _

_"__Hey, come on, kiddo." Dean whispered, his voice thick with emotion, only causing Sam to cry harder._

Dean had done his best to make it better, to comfort his baby brother when the only world that Sam knew was coming to an end. But this time, Sam realized heartbreakingly, nothing Dean could do or say was gonna make things alright.

_You won__'__t be able to fix it this time, big brother._

"Sam! SAM!" Dean yelled, and Sam snapped abruptly out of his trance, startled to realize he was now staring at three very worried people. "Dude, you okay?" Dean asked and Sam nodded, furiously rubbing at his eyes.

"Are you sure?" Naomi asked and moved to sit next to him on the bed. Warning signals were flashing in her head, but she didn't know why.

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry. I was just thinking." Sam smiled at them.

"And crying," came the familiar voice from the other side of the room, and Sam raised his eyes to see her. He really should have felt so much more embarrassed at her seeing him like this, but he couldn't find it in himself to care. He needed to focus. He needed to snap out of this, for their sake if not his own, so Sam chose to focus on one thing, the soothing circular motion of Naomi's hand on his back.

"You sure you're okay?" Naomi asked when Sam's breathing had returned to normal, her comforting blue eyes shining into his.

"Yeah." Sam said, swallowing another sob. "I'm good―what about you? How did things go today?" Sam asked her, getting up off of the bed and walking to the kitchenette. "You guys want anything?" he asked, anything to keep his mind off of what was going to happen in less then eight hours time.

"Well, apart from not knowing her name, Naomi did great," Dean said with a grin. "You shoulda been there, Sam―I heard my son's heartbeat!" Dean buzzed as he fussed around Naomi, making her comfortable on the bed, giving her too many pillows, smothering her in blankets. Sam laughed from the other side of the room when he looked up from his dazed trance of blocking out the guilt to barely make out Naomi sitting perfectly still and squashed under the blankets.

"Dean, what are you doing?" Sam asked, amusement in his voice.

"The doc said that she needs to rest, and I'm supposed to keep her comfortable." Dean smiled brightly from beside the bed.

"Yeah, but when did he say you were supposed to smother her in pillows and blankets?" Sam bit down on his lip to keep the tremor of laughter in his voice from becoming anything more than that. Dean looked confused as Lola made her way over to rescue her friend, who was slowly sinking into the too soft mattress under the weight of the material Dean had taken to mean "rest." Dean sulked when Naomi wiggled on the bed, two pillows at her back and one raising her feet slightly off of the mattress, without a blanket.

"Would you like me to order in from twenty different places, or are you okay with the one?" Lola laughed, receiving a glare from Dean who crossed his arms across and chest and petulantly threw himself down on Sam's bed. Naomi sighed and rolled her eyes, _No arguments, no ill feeling now. Not. Now. _She prayed silently as she began to move, only to have both Dean and Lola blocking her way.

"Tell me what you want, and I can get it for you," Dean spoke, and Naomi smiled, pulling him closer to her and snuggling into his warmth.

"This." She whispered softly against his collarbone, her fingers tracing patterns along his jaw. Sam swallowed hard. In the ten years that they had known each other, Sam had taken for granted just how much they had come to rely on each other, how much they _needed_ each other. How at ease they were around each other, how his stupid destiny was going to ruin that for them.

_Not if I can help it._

"Guys, can you not do that now?" Lola asked as she covered her eyes. Naomi laughed and pulled Dean in for a long, slow-loving kiss, laughing into it when she heard Lola pretend to gag. Breathing Dean in deeply as she rested her forehead against his, Naomi looked deep into his green eyes and giggled.

"Think we should show them?" she breathed against his lips, her legs over his lap.

"Yeah." Dean agreed and kissed her again before moving to get his jacket and took out the small piece of card stock from his pocket. "Here." He held it out to Sam, who took it cautiously and opened it. Staring at the image of his nephew sucking on his thumb brought back the bitter feeling of guilt he'd been fighting to push aside and made the tears sting his eyes again. Sam's thoughts were interrupted by a high pitched squeak of "Oh my God! It's a _boy_!" Sam looked up half confused when he saw the girls cuddled around one of the images of the baby. "We got you both one." Dean smiled proudly at Sam. "How awesome is he?" Dean beamed and looked at Sam. "_We_," he pointed to Naomi, "did _that_!" He sounded like the excited five-year-old again.

"I think Sam is the most aware of that fact, Dean," Naomi laughed from the other side of the room. The rich sound reflected her happiness, her head thrown back, her shoulders shaking, tears making their way down her cheeks. These tears, however were a different kind if tears. _These_ tears were tears from laughing too much and not tears from hurting so bad that she didn't want to face the world. Dean could help but smile with her—it was contagious, and soon, he was laughing too. Sam though, didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Lola looked alarmed when her eyes rested on Sam, silently pleading for him to let her escape from the mad house that the motel room had become. Sam nodded and made a break for the door, with Lola in hot pursuit.

"Okay, what the hell has gotten into our little hormonal hurricane in there?" Lola asked and Sam couldn't believe how serious she was. Sam let out a small chuckle and had to hold back the laughter at the look on her face.

"She's just happy," Sam said with a smile. _And I'm gonna make sure she stays happy._

"You know, last night, I fully clicked on how I knew you." Lola got that far away look in her eyes, and Sam nodded.

"Yeah, me, too." His lips curled up into a small smile that vanished just as quickly as it arrived.

"You were Hailie's boyfriend." Lola nodded gravely, walking over and looking between the Impala and Naomi's Mustang before deciding that she would be much safer if she sat on the blue car belonging to the old couple next door.

"I was," Sam confirmed, and Lola nodded again. "I was thinking about her recently, you know the stupid little things," he confessed quietly.

"She never blamed you or held you responsible, you know." Lola dropped her eyes onto the floor as Sam took his place beside her in the hood of the car.

"You don't know that." He shook his head, and Lola turned to him.

"You're gonna think I'm nuts when I tell you this and truth be told, I thought I was, too." Sam opened his mouth to speak but Lola pushed on. "A few months after her death, I saw her, and I don't mean acid trip seeing things, I mean I saw her, I walked into my apartment and there she was. Sitting on my sofa. Waiting for me." Lola looked at the ground and Sam placed his arm around her shoulders.

"I don't think that you're nuts. People need to see things to help them gain closure, to help them cope." Sam tried to explain but Lola shook her head.

"No Sam. I don't believe in that kinda stuff, but I _saw_ her—she _spoke _to me." Lola protested and gazed at Sam. "She told me to tell you to forgive yourself because she had done it, and that it wasn't your fault." Lola looked at Sam realising how stupid she must actually be sounding. "Do you believe in that closure stuff then?" she asked, suddenly uneasy.

"No, not really. I don't believe in that destiny stuff, either." He shrugged. _Liar. _

"I believe in destiny." Lola said in a small voice, then louder, "I believe you have a path already chosen for you and you have to fulfil it."

"Or what will happen?" Sam teased and nudged her in the ribs.

"The Muffin Man will come and eat you all up." Lola whispered in her best little girl voice, and Sam laughed, appreciating the reprieve from his thoughts that her reply offered. "So," she continued, "what do you think those two are doing in there? Think it's safe to go in?" She looked at Sam.

"Well based on experience, I'd say it would be safer going to get food. You wanna grab something to eat before you go?" Sam looked at Lola who nodded her head.

"Lucky for us, there's a diner just across the street―I'm not too eager to go back for car keys," Sam laughed, hopping off of the hood of the car._ Maybe a little trip to normality will help me figure out how I'm going to word this to Dean. S_am sighed and laughed when Lola linked her arm through his.

"I really wanted to say goodbye before I left," Lola whispered sadly to Sam who hugged her tighter to him.

"Don't worry. There will be plenty of chances to say goodbye." he smiled softly_. For you at least. _

* * *

Naomi curled up to Dean, her fingers dancing over his abs, relishing in the way they fluttered beneath her fingertips. "He knows when you're around by the way," she said against Dean's jaw.

"Hmm?"

"The baby, he knows when you're around. Won't settle down until he knows you're safe." Naomi smiled at the familiar feeling of Dean's right hand running over her belly. It used to be ticklish, then it became downright annoying. But now, now it was comforting. _Hell, _Naomi thought,_ I actually miss his touch when he's not there. _Dean seemed to be right in sync with her thoughts when he shifted his position slightly to be able to sit with his hand over her womb.

"Course he does," Dean said eventually into the comfortable silence of the room. "He's a natural hunter―bred from the best, baby," he told her with a smirk.

"Best not let Lola hear you saying that. God only knows the questions you would get asked," Naomi half laughed. "Have you thought about what you want him called?" She asked quietly, her arms pulling him tighter to her.

"Well, yeah I have." Dean admitted quietly, the fingertips of his left hand ghosting up and down her spine.

"And?" Naomi asked brightly. "What did you think up? And please don't give me Han Solo, Anakin Skywalker, or Richie Sambora," Naomi pleaded, and Dean laughed loudly. "Or Harrison Ford," she added with a smirk of her own.

"Damn." He pretended to be annoyed. "Nah, I was thinking more along the lines of our fathers' names."

"Like John Richard?" Naomi asked, and Dean nodded against the top of her head.

"What about you? Have you given it any thought?" Dean asked as his fingers began to gently knead the tense muscles of her back.

"Yeah, I wanted to call him Dean," she whispered, her eyes locked on the amulet hanging against his chest, watching as his breathing quickened slightly.

"You wanna call him _Dean_?" he asked finally, his mind spinning back as to why she would want their son to be called Dean. _Of_ _all the names, why would she want something as simple as Dean?_

"Yeah, I do." Naomi stated simply, pushing herself up and straddling Dean. "If you don't like it, then we'll change it." She shrugged and Dean looked at her, amusement etched on his face.

"Oh will we?" Dean asked and Naomi grinned.

"Hell. No." And there was that smile again, the smile that she only smiled for _him_, the smile that no other man would...Dean's thoughts trailed off suddenly, a troubled look on his face as he glanced back at her.

"Will you replace me?" He blurted out into the room, his stomach churning, fear taking him into it's fierce grip as realization dawned that she would be alone. The burning pain of regret was rooted deep in his gut as he watched the emotions play over her face. He'd had his fair share of women since he was a teenager, but she had met him when she eighteen.

_Ten years is a long time to be with one man…but as much as I hate the thought of her in another man's arms, it's something that she needs to do, something that _I_ need her to do._

Dean watched as Naomi's eyes widened when she finally understood what he was saying to her. _Does he really think that I'm capable of loving someone else? _Naomi felt her eyes fill with tears at how lost and uncertain Dean looked.

"No. No way, Dean." She shook her head furiously, slightly perplexed when Dean's green gaze seemed to be searching her face for a long moment.

"What if I said I wanted you to?" he asked softly.

"I would say you're crazy," she blurted out, staggered by his soft-spoken words. "You can't expect me to move on Dean, not after this, not after everything!" Naomi felt the hot tears glide down her cheeks. _He wants me to replace him...he's already given up on me, on us? _Dean cupped her jaw lightly and wiped away some of the tears.

"Mimi, look…I know this sounds cruel, but…I don't want you to be alone when I'm gone. And we both know that it's not just you I have to think about any more. I have to think about our son, too. I'm not doubting for a moment that you wouldn't be able to look after him yourself, but I don't think you should have to. You didn't ask for this," Dean said gently, his thumb stoking her cheek. Naomi didn't know what to do.

_He _has_ given up on me. He's given up on us. The sheer agony I've gone through in the past few months, every tear I've cried, was worth nothing. He's ready for me to just let him go and go through all of that all over again with someone else? Someone who will never measure up. Someone who isn't _him_. Great. Just freaking fantastic. _

"You want that?" Naomi spat out bitterly through a sudden onslaught of sobs. Dean nodded but didn't say anything, and Naomi nodded in response. "That's it?" she asked angrily pushing off of him. "That's _it_?!" she yelled, and Dean looked confused. "After _everything _we've been through, you've given up on us? On me? You're ready to push me off to the next guy? Dean, for the past three months, I've been crying myself to sleep every night because I know that soon you'll be gone. You're _dying._ I've memorized everything about you: the way you hold me, the way you kiss me, the way you laugh, the way you smile, the way you watch over me and Sammy when you think we're asleep. Knowing that you're dying has torn me apart, but you want me to find someone else?!" Naomi sobbed as she pushed out of the bed and struggled to slip her tennis shoes on.

"Naomi that's not…" A sharp slap rang out across his face when Naomi stood up.

"How else could you possibly mean that?" Naomi asked in a broken voice. She swallowed and picked up the keys, not caring whose they were, as long as the car had gas in the tank. She just needed out. She needed to be gone. Naomi didn't look back when she swung open the door and checked the key chain for whose car it was. And it became almost impossible to see through her tear-filled eyes when she realized which car was going to be her getaway car. The familiar creaking of the door seemed to echo in her ears as she opened and closed it behind her, her not-so-lithe frame sinking into the interior. His scent permeated the air around her, all leather, cologne and _Dean_, and she couldn't hold back the tears anymore as she sped out of the parking lot.

Dean didn't try to follow her, instead staring after her before laying back down on the bed, silent tears of bitter regret running down his cheeks.

_After everything that she's done for me, everything that she's given up for me, I make it sound like I'm trying to get her to let me go. God. I didn't want her to hate me—she was the one thing I was holding on so tightly for. Her and my son. Whenever I needed anything she was there, making it okay. And now I'm the one to let her down…But maybe I've done her a favor in the long run. Maybe the more she hates me, the easier it'll be for her to let me go. At least she'll know not to go for guys like me…Who the hell am I kidding here? _he thought harshly as he twisted his wedding ring around on his finger. _I just managed to screw that up, as fucking usual. _

He silently cursed himself, not even bothering to wipe his eyes when the motel room door opened and someone walked in. Hell, it could have been the hellhounds and Dean wouldn't have cared.

"Dean! Dean, what's wrong? Where's Naomi?" Sam gasped as he made his way over to his brother's side, new-found worry mixing with his guilt in a churning rush of emotion that made him feel ill. Sam pulled Dean into a hug, even more worried when Dean actually let him do it.

And Sam's heart shattered when Dean suddenly buried his face in his shoulder, a sob of broken defeat escaping as he fell apart in Sam's grasp.

_Any other night and this would have been bad enough, but of all nights, he has to fall apart on me _this_ night. Damn it! _"Dean, come on, what's wrong?" Sam both soothed and urged at the same time, desperate to fix his brother.

"She's gone."

"What happened?" Sam knew his voice was cracking, but he didn't care. Dean was in pain, enough pain that he was allowing Sam to hold him, practically begging him to make it go away.

"I tried, Sam."

"You tried what?" Sam couldn't take it anymore, he had never seen Dean like this, this broken, this hurt. There was only person Sam knew that could fix this, but apparently that one person was the one person who broke him in the first place.

"I told her to move on," Dean finally to say, and Sam sat stunned.

"You told her what?" he asked incredulously, his voice nevertheless gentle, as he knew well enough that he couldn't afford for Dean to close up on him now. Dean pushed up from Sam and wiped his eyes.

"I told her to find another man, to be happy, that I didn't want her to be alone." Dean seemed more at ease with his admission than Sam thought he would ever be.

"She didn't take it well, huh?" _Well duh Sam. Dean wouldn't be sitting here now if she had taken it well. _The pink hue of embarrassment set into Sam's cheeks, and Dean let out an uncomfortable laugh, pulling away from Sam's grip as he suddenly realized what he was doing.

"Yeah, she took it great…it was after it that the fireworks kicked off."

Dean got that far-away look in his eyes, and Sam knew it was only a matter of time before Dean reacted. He knew well enough that situations like this would only end one of two ways: either Dean would clam up and mask his pain with silence, or he'd look for the nearest outlet for violence—a random bar brawl or a vicious hunt, whichever came first.

As Dean's hot, angry gaze looked down at the floor, Sam began the countdown, waiting to see exactly how Dean would choose to deal with this. _Ten, nine, eight, seven— _

Sam winced when the lamp smashed off of the wall, shattering into pieces with a loud crash.

_Okay, so this is how were dealing with it._ Sam leaned back on the bed, creating a little more distance between himself and Dean. Dean's breathing had become harsher, his control obviously beginning to slip enough that Sam found a reason to wonder if he would have to engage in hand-to-hand combat with his brother before all was said and done. Dean rose from the bed and walked over to the dresser, leaning on it, his head bowed between his shoulders.

Sam tugged his bottom lip between his teeth and started the countdown again, managing to get to five this time before Dean pushed everything off of the top of it. Sam glanced around the room for something else for Dean to wreck, panicking slightly when he came up with nothing substantial. Dean walked into the bathroom and Sam let out an unsteady breath_. …three, two, one_. Sam winced when he heard the mirror shatter, automatically getting up to rifle through the duffles for the first aid kit, unwilling to risk going near the bathroom until he was certain Dean had settled but wanting to be ready all the same.

Ten long minutes later and Dean walked out of the bathroom, gaze firmly planted on the floor.

"I'll clean this up," he mumbled sitting heavily on the bed.

"Don't worry about it. Lemme see your hand." Sam held his hand out for Dean who slowly raised his bloodied knuckles.

"I shouldn't have lost control like that, OW!" Dean glared when Sam ran the alcohol over his hand.

"Sorry, but you're the one who insists on punching mirrors," Sam told him, trying to keep his tone light and playful, his way of letting Dean know that it was okay.

"Yeah, well, next time I'm going for the leather couch and Dr. Phil." Dean said, gazing down at his busted knuckles before hazarding a glance at Sam, who chuckled.

"I would actually pay to see that," Sam joked and Dean let out a laugh.

"Everyone would." Dean watched in silence as Sam patched him up and put the bandage around his hand.

"Dean, how would you feel if you had a way out of this?" Sam asked.

"What?" he asked, his jaw dropping slightly.

"What would you do if we found a last minute solution to this?" Sam asked again, watching the range of emotions flicker over his brother's face.

"I dunno, Sam, but we're not finding anything," Dean muttered as Sam smiled up at Dean, tears shining in his eyes as he furiously tried to blink them away.

"Dean, for the record, you would have made a great dad. Hell, you did an amazing job with me. And I never thanked you for that…I threw it in your face the day I went to Stanford―I never meant to, Dean. Hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do." Sam let out a shaky breath and swallowed past the lump in his throat before he continued. "You're an awesome big brother and an awesome best friend. I wouldn't be who I am today without you. You should go find Naomi. You need each other right now…besides she's had time to cool down," Sam said, smiling through his tears, and Dean raised an eyebrow.

"What's going on with you? You're a whole two days early with that speech," Dean asked his eyes narrowing slightly as he tried to figure out what exactly his brother's problem was, and Sam chuckled, wiping his eyes.

_Lie lie lie lie lie lie lie._ The word bounced about in Sam's head.

"Well, I just…thought I'd do it now, you know, because, I know you wouldn't want that on the last day of your life…since you hate socially awkward moments and all…wouldn't want it to be awkward and all." Sam averted his gaze from his brothers who raised an eyebrow.

"Sam, is there something you want to tell me?" Dean asked, not fooled for one moment.

"Um...no, no, nothing, there's nothing for you to know or else I would have told you and seeing as I haven't then that means there's nothing." _Smooth Sam, real smooth. _

"Okay, Sparky, spill." Dean looked at Sam with his classic don't-BS-me stare, and Sam sighed.

"Look, if I was to leave it until the last minute to tell you all that, you wouldn't be able to spend that time with Naomi, and I guess a part of me is hoping that I don't have to be there to say it 'cause I would be finding that all important deal breaker at the last minute." Sam looked past Dean's head. _Not exactly a lie... _Dean shook his head, still hugely unconvinced by Sam's excuse.

"Sam, listen to me, you are _not_ going to risk your life for this," Dean said, dipping his head to catch Sam's gaze. "I'm serious. I didn't give up my life and my soul so that you could throw away yours." Dean was stern but somehow gentle with Sam who nodded.

"We should..um... we should find Naomi." Sam cleared his throat and wiped his eyes.

"Yeah. I suppose," Dean said slowly, willing to let the matter go only because he didn't know how to continue it. "So how do you propose we find her, college boy? In case you didn't notice, '67 Chevy Impalas don't exactly come equipped with GPS locators," Dean pointed out, and Sam smiled and shrugged.

"We don't need one—I have a funny feeling I know where is. Come on, we'll take her car, seeing as she's taken yours."

* * *

Sam smiled when he pulled up to Dean and Naomi's wedding spot to see the Impala parked right where he'd thought it would be, Naomi sitting on the hood, as curled in on herself as she could possibly be. "Go on, Dean, I'll see you back at the motel," Sam whispered softly into the cool night air. Dean nodded quietly and patted his brother on the back.

"Thanks, Sammy," he muttered sincerely as he climbed out of the car and made his way over to where his wife was.

"Any time Dean." Sam breathed as he watched Dean walk away from Naomi's Mustang, his eyes steady on the Impala. _I promised you I'd fix this and now I will,_ he thought, his face hard with resolve as he pulled away_. _

* * *

"This a private party, or can anyone join?" Dean asked as he took in the view of the city lights.

"Well, I'm waiting for the next guy to come along, seeing as you're so eager to get rid of me," she replied hotly, turning away from him.

"Okay, I deserved that… But, you gotta see it from my point of view, Naomi―God forbid, if this was turned, and it was you who was dying, wouldn't you want me to be happy, not to be alone?" Dean asked as he walked around to where she was sitting and stood in front of her, wiping away the small tears she had let fall. "You're still young, with your whole life ahead of you. I'm not asking you to forget everything we've had, everything we've done. I know for a fact that nothing can make you forget. But all I'm asking is for you to be happy."

"I don't want to forget you Dean…I can't stand the thought of our son calling someone else 'Daddy'." She rested her hands on his shoulder and slipped down the hood so he was standing between her legs. "I love you." She began to sob again, and Dean pulled her towards him.

"I love you, too, Naomi, but…this…I need to know that you won't let my decisions plague you for the rest of your life. I need you to be happy. Can you do that for me?" he asked gently, and she nodded, pressing her lips to his, _Dean wants me to move on, I guess I'll have to try someday, or at least tell him I will, stubborn bastard will probably haunt me to make sure I do._

"Just as long as I get to call him Dean," she whispered against his lips, and Dean chuckled slightly.

"I don't think some guy will appreciate being called your dead husband's name." Dean laughed, placing a kiss against her temple.

"Not the guy, stupid, your son." She took Dean's hand and rested it over her womb, "I was actually thinking of calling you―he's been determined to leave me with bruises ever since I left."

"Hey little man, give your mom a break, huh," Dean bent down and pressed a kiss to her stomach. He stood up and wrapped his arms around her. "Right, that's one mini-me sorted―time to go see Sam and thank him for driving my ass out here." He kissed her softly, and Naomi tightened her arms around him.

"Do we have to go back?" she whined, and Dean laughed.

"Yeah. Besides, anything we did out here wouldn't be comfortable for you." He gave her a lewd wink, and she rolled her eyes, unable to hold back a grin at the look on his face.

"Uh-uh. Cause that's what I'm worried about—try indecent exposure. Let's go stud," she giggled as he helped her off of the hood.

"Keys," he said firmly, holding his hand out and Naomi smirked at him.

"What, don't you trust me with your car? I got her here in one piece, didn't I?" Naomi teased.

"Course I trust you with my car. I just don't think she likes your hands all over her—she resents you, you know. She doesn't like to share me with anyone." Dean matched her smirk and held his hand out for the keys.

"Fine then, she can have you." Naomi replied and held out the keys to him, pulling him in for a lingering kiss when his fingers wrapped around the cool metal. It wasn't until she climbed into the Impala and Dean shut the door behind her that she realised just how bittersweet the kiss was, and when Dean slipped behind the wheel and began muttering to the car, Naomi knew that soon enough, the only nice words the Impala would be getting would be from her or Sam.

"Dean, what happened to your hand?"

"Uh, I got into a fight with the guy whose wife I was thinking about earlier." He shrugged innocently, staring the Impala's engine.

"Yeah? Who won?" Naomi's eyes glittered with mischief.

"Me obviously," Dean smirked at her.

"Well, you see I was thinking that I would have to kiss any wounds you had all better,. But... seeing as you won and you're okay..." Naomi shrugged and Dean glanced at her.

"Well he did get a few hits in..." Dean trailed off and Naomi simply laughed, leaning over to press a kiss against his lips, her fingers tangling in his hair.

"See all better," she whispered against his lips and Dean smiled.

"You know me pretty well." Dean remarked, kissing her head before pulling her into him.

"yeah I do," she sighed leaning into his embrace. _I really do. So how am I ever going to let you go?_

* * *

Sam stood in the motel room and took in his surroundings; things had been cleared up a bit since Dean went on his little destructive spree, but the ritual items was laid out carefully on the table and the bed, a large blade set beside the candles as the old woman prepared things. The clock struck midnight and the old woman turned around, previously dark eyes now glowing white in the eerie light of the motel room. Sam swallowed the gasp when she broke into a malicious grin.

"Lilith."

"How nice to finally meet you, Sammy," she said coldly. "Get into the middle of the circle," she commanded. Sam sighed and stepped into the middle of the circle, and a wicked smirk passed over her wrinkled face. "You do realize that you've signed yourself over to me now?" she asked with malicious glee, her old, cackled laugh cutting through the air.

"Sorry we're late, Sammy—we..." Naomi's voice trailed off as she pushed open the motel room door. "Oh, God! Dean, It's her, GO!" she screamed, pausing only a few steps into the room, her body going rigid with shock only a second before an unseen force pushed her back against the wall, pinning her in place.

"What the hell?!" Dean exclaimed, making his way into the room despite his wife's warnings. "God, Sam! What did you do?!" he shouted. Sam turned to him, tears shining in his eyes as he gazed helplessly back at his older brother. "What did you do?" Dean asked again, his voice pained and thick, desperate.

"I just wanted to help you." Sam let the first tear fall, and Dean closed his eyes.

"I told you—" Dean managed before his body was hurled through the air, smashing against the wall beside Naomi, pinned as helplessly as his wife.

"You _brought _her here?!" Naomi fumed, "You knew who she was and you brought her _here_? She's been stalking us for ages, annoying the crap outta me, and you _knew _about it?! You_ knew _and you didn't _say _anything?" Her breath was coming in ragged gasps.

"I'm sorry, it was the only way," Sam tried to reason, but it was Naomi he was talking to, so the odds of getting through to her were slim. _No one can reason with her when she's pissed off._

"Bullshit, Sam! You coulda done nothing like I told you to!" Dean yelled and Naomi let out an aggravated sigh.

"If you all are quite finished with your little domestic dispute, I have a soul to collect," Lilith stated from were she was standing at the table.

"Shut up, bitch—you're not getting anything!" Dean yelled, pulling at the invisible restraints. Lilith cocked her head to one side and breathed out evenly, and suddenly Dean found himself straining to speak, his words cut off as he suddenly found himself gasping for air.

"You have me—let them go." Sam turned back to the old woman in front of him, his face a mixture of defiance and entreaty.

"Sammy, Sammy, Sammy," she purred in a sing-song voice. "There is something you're forgetting here―this isn't just about you. You, I can take care of right now, but him..." She glared at Dean, "He's just as much of a problem—."

"Then let Naomi go, and take me as planned." Dean choked out, interrupting her mid-sentence, his eyes desperate as he strained to speak against the demon's invisible hold.

"You don't understand, do you?" Lilith laughed. "This isn't just about _you_, either. But you fell for it―hook, line, and sinker, just like your brother." With a smirk, Lilith looked past Sam, and with a flick of her head, Naomi was suddenly being dragged upward, her body inching its way toward the ceiling. "Look familiar, boys?" Lilith cooed.

"Fell for what? And if you hurt her I swear I'll kill you!" Dean grit out and Lilith laughed.

"All in good time sweetie! How are you planning on killing me?" She grinned and Naomi glared, taking a page from Dean's book and letting her temper take over.

"Burn in hell, bitch." she snapped.

"Tut, tut, that's not a very nice thing to say to the person who's about to save your husband's soul from a life time of torture." Lilith looked up at her on the ceiling. "For that matter, I saved yours, too. I could have just as easily killed you that night, but no, I let you live. I let you live a long, happy life. Aren't you glad I did?" Lilith's eyes sparkled as Naomi became impossibly pinned to the ceiling above Sam's head.

"I said let her go!" Dean's voice was thick with the emotion and effort it took to keep them in check.

"How about you shut up, or I finish what I started all those nights ago, but let you watch and this time not just find her in pool of blood?" Lilith snapped, and for once, Dean did as he was told, his jaw clenched tightly as he fell silent.

"You really are a bitch." Naomi glared from the ceiling, and Lilith rolled her eyes, turning her attention back to Sam.

"You know, it's a real shame that Dean-y boy won't be around to see his son grow up." Lilith's loud cackle filled the room, and Sam's head turned to look at her.

"But…" Sam tried off everything he wanted to say was about to come out in one jumbled mess.

"But what?" Lilith smiled at him and Sam. "Didn't precious little Hailie mention that one little detail along with everything else?" Lilith batted her eye lids at Sam.

"Screw you." Sam growled.

"Easy, tiger, I don't do the enemy. I would have killed the bitch if she hadn't crossed over…but she did set me up nice and easy. Some of her information was wrong. Jess and Mary aren't in Hell―I made sure of that the second Azazel died--"

"What!?" Sam exclaimed.

"I abhor family reunions. So I killed them. People say demons can't die but trust me they can, nice and slow and messy. All. Over. Again. You shoulda been there, Sam—Jess was screaming for you, begging you to come and help her," she breathed, "and little Sammy wasn't there. Boo hoo, hoo!" Lilith teased mercilessly.

"Shut up!" Sam yelled, but Lilith ignored him and continued.

"Hailie told you everything. _Every little thing._" Lilith stepped as close to Sam as she could without getting into the circle herself and smirked. "The things I've gone through to get you here, for this moment, and all she has to do is tell you the truth, and you come running―priceless. You are that stupid, that obsessed with saving Dean, that you run straight into my trap, too willing to make yourself my bitch. And _you_," Lilith said pointedly, looking up at Naomi on the ceiling. "_You _were a gem. They could have found me months ago, but you found me and chose not to tell them. You chose to find out about _Ruby _instead. Stupid of you, really. But I must admit when you took me on, a lot of demons turned against me, thought I was weak." The hold tightened around Naomi's throat, and she struggled for breath.

"For the last time let her go you white-eyed whore!" Dean called from the other side of the room in shock, _Naomi took on Lilith, Sam knew about Yellow Eyes. Hell, was there anything anyone was willing to tell me?_

"Fine, seeing as you asked so nicely," Lilith let Naomi slide down the wall but kept her beside Dean. "Wouldn't want to get baby gunk on my head if she decides to pop." Lilith turned to the table and took a large blade out of its sheath, her eyes glowing an eerie white as she turned back to Sam.

"You go anywhere near him and I don't care if I have to search all of Hell itself to find you, I _will _kill you!" Dean yelled causing Lilith to let out a wild laugh.

"Sweetheart, when I get my way, you'll be crossed over― I'll rule earth, and you won't be able to touch me." The glint in her eyes got stronger as she passed Sam and sidled up next to Dean.

"Cross over? Check the contract, sweetheart. I'll be in hell." Dean grunted, turning his head away from hers, as she pressed her body against his.

"Oh come on, Dean, what do you think this is here?" She pressed a kiss against the side of his mouth, licking her way up his face to tongue his ear lobe. "Sammy's going to Hell, so you don't have to. But you _will _die. So, I'll still meet you at the cross roads in just under 48 hours." She bit down on his ear lobe.

"Get your skanky paws off of my man, bitch," Naomi growled as she looked away.

"Jealous?" Lilith giggled as she made her way over to Naomi, holding her jaw in her hand.

"Of you? Please, I'm more jealous of his car." Naomi smirked defiantly, and Lilith stroked her cheek.

"Poor little innocent, Mimi—you just don't get it, do you? Being a smart-ass isn't always the best option. Especially when I'm holding a knife in my hand."

"Well then you'd be getting a three-for-one Winchester special—I'd say that's a bargain." Naomi smirked, and Lilith's face fell into a set scowl.

"Oh Hell yeah! When you are all burning in hell I'll be the first to throw the party!" She snapped again and Naomi's smirk broadened.

"Any last words?" she yelled at Sam, who stood with a sudden smirk on his face. "What are you so happy about?" But he didn't answer as he merely continued to smile. "Hand." She commanded and Snatched at his hand, the blade making an incision into his palm. Holding his hand over a sigil and letting the blood drip onto it, Lilith began to chant a Latin ritual.

"Sam, no," Dean begged, and Sam shook his head. Naomi closed her eyes against the spinning of the room as Lilith's chanting grew louder and faster, faster and louder until...

"Dean!" Sam cried, followed by a loud thud, and Naomi's eyes flew open, fear pounding in her chest. For the briefest of seconds, she felt the invisible hold on them weaken as Lilith's attention strayed. Before she could react, Dean's hand flew for the Colt that Sam had tossed to the floor.

In one brilliant flash of light and one blood-curdling scream, it was over.

**Lemme guess? You all hate me round about now? Muahahahaha!**

**the faster you review that faster you get the cliff hanger sorted out... ;)**

**Love you all!**

**K**

**xox**


	21. Sweet ForgetMeNots and Second Thoughts

* * *

**A/N:**

Okay,So I have a confession to make... this is the last chapter... this is where this story ends. If you are sensitive you may wanna get the tiissues out! LOL

ANNNDDD! DICLAMIER: I DONT OWN THE BONJOVI SONG USED INT THIS FIC.

Yes ladies, I have the Bonjovi moment! happy Dances

Anyways, This chapter is full of angst and drama and NO! lol. There is two really beautiful songs, one called "One Moment More" By Mindy Smith and the other called "Hold On." by Sarah McLachlan. They kinda set the mood for this chapter... awesome songs so you might wanna take a listen! ALSO! if you really wanna go all out to make this chapter work, Listen to "Here With You" by Saliva, its Dean and NAomi's wedding song if you remember! LOL

Right, Here is where the biggest ever thanks goes out to my darling Camlann for being the most wonderful person on this planet and getting this sorted for me! This chapter really is her doing, She took my ideas and my really crappy chapter and helped me change it into this monster, so i think she deserves a lot of credit for that! hugs

Also, a really huge thanks to everyone who has reviewed and alerted and favourited! Thanks for taking the time to do that and taking the time to stick this out to the end!

I'm tearing up right about now, so I'm gonna let the chapter do the talking and I'll have a little ranodm say at the bottom!

enjoy!

* * *

Sweet Forget-me-nots and Second Thoughts.

Naomi opened her eyes – not actually remembering closing them - to find herself kneeling on the floor, the body Lilith had been possessing lying deathly still on the floor, as Dean crouched over her protectively, and Sam lay unmoving in the middle of the circle.

_Is it over? _she wondered, frantically running her fingers over Dean's body, looking for injuries. With a slight groan, Dean lifted his head and gazed into Naomi's eyes as he slowly moved back to give her room .

As if in answer to the silent question she could see in his eyes, the same question that was mirrored in his own gaze, she nodded, allowing him to quickly scan her for injuries before she pushed him towards Sam's still form. She watched him stagger to his feet and make his way over to Sam, John's constant training no doubt ringing in his ears as with a snarl of frustration, he paused long enough to cast a quick glance at the woman's body.

"I think she's dead, Dean." _If the bullet in the chest is anything to go by. _"Check on Sam. Hurry," she urged, worried by Sam's stillness_._

"Sam, come on, wake up," Dean said, falling to his knees beside his younger brother. As she awkwardly began to climb to her feet, a sense of relief filled her as she caught sight of Sam stirring. He let out a soft groan and Dean reached out a hand to help him, only to recoil in horror when Sam stood suddenly. _Oh God, no! _she thought as Sam faced them, his usual emotion filled face was completely blank, gazing back at them with eyes as black as night.

"Sammy?" Her bottom lip trembled as she breathed out the word, but Sam simply seemed to look straight through her before running out of the motel room and into the darkness. They watched him disappear, both of them frozen in place for a long moment before Dean dropped his eyes back to the place Sam had lay.

_How do I fix this? I can't fix this,_ she thought, dying a little inside at the look of sheer loss on Dean's face, a look that she caught only a glimpse of before he shut down, replacing it with a mask of cold, unfeeling resolve.

"Pack our stuff and find us a new motel while I take care of this—call me when you find one," he spoke, his voice calm and emotionless. It was an order, and Naomi knew better than to argue with him. She watched Dean out if the corner of her eye as he cleared up the mess left by Lilith and periodically helped her put some things into the duffel bags, all without a word. Naomi had to fight back tears when Dean kissed her on the side of the head as he grabbed the bags to put them in her car.

"He could be anywhere, so be careful. Alright?" Dean's voice was nothing more than a broken whisper, his internal struggle with the turn of events etched over his face despite his attempts to push it aside.

"Of course I will—you, too." Naomi didn't bother to hide the tremor in her voice, and this time, she didn't bother to hold back her tears, sobbing violently against Dean when he pulled her closer to him.

"Come on, Mimi. I need you to go now. Sam's out there somewhere, and we have to get this done. You know how to pour the salt lines, don't you?" Dean ran his hands up and down her arms swallowing hard when she nodded against his chest. "Good. Now, go on. I need you gone, so that I know you're safe." But that wasn't the only reason, she knew. He needed her gone so that she wouldn't see him fall apart. He didn't say the words, but she knew it to be true, all the same. Because that's how Dean was. Only this time, Sam wasn't here to help him, to make it better. So the words he didn't say lingered there, and while she wanted nothing more than to wrap him in her arms and hold him, she knew he wouldn't let her. Not now.

"Okay, just…don't take too long," Naomi told him softly, her eyes pleading with him to hurry. She needed Dean right now, and she knew for a fact he needed her, too.

"I won't. Call me." He kissed her head again, opening the door to allow her to get into the car.

* * *

_He's in shock,_ Naomi reasoned as she drove through the half deserted streets of the town_. And why the hell wouldn't he be? Seriously. Sam's gone. And what did __that bitch__ mean, that Dean would still be gone? Where was Dean going? Where was Dean right now? Sammy's gone. Where is Sam? _Naomi felt the tears run down her cheeks.

_We should __have__ known better than to be happy._ She slammed her hands on the steering wheel as she stopped at the traffic light. She knew of a motel just outside of town, near to the little spot they had gotten married, a place close by where Dean could possibly let out any emotions he was feeling. Naomi rested her head on her arms and let out a shaky breath. _God damn it! _She cursed and hit the steering wheel again. _Why can't things __just__ go __right__ for once, for _Dean?_ God. _

Naomi was unsure whether to cry or laugh when her son began another ferocious bout of kicking and moving. He wanted his daddy. He_ needed_ his daddy. And Naomi needed her Dean. Pulling away from the lights, Naomi flicked on the radio, a habitual action when she was behind the wheel or in the passenger seat of a car, and let out a few more tears at the song that began to play. Singing along softly to her wedding song, Naomi pulled into the parking lot of the motel.

"Come on, Junior, give mom a break, would you?" Naomi pleaded as her unborn son began another bout of kicking. "Daddy will be here soon, I promise." _Who am I even trying to convince, him or me? _Naomi scanned the area quickly before pushing open the door to the car, shoving the flask of holy water from the seat into her purse before climbing out and hurrying inside the motel office. The bell above the door chimed when Naomi walked through, and an older woman- maybe mid fifties- came to the front.

"Can I help you, darlin'?" she asked sweetly.

"Do you have any rooms available?" _Can you stop time and give me eternity with my husband?_

"Sure we do, sweetie. King or two queens?" The old woman smiled brightly at her.

"Tw… a king, please." Naomi dropped her gaze to the desk, fighting back tears once again. They wouldn't be needing another bed. Sam was _gone,_ for the time being at least, and she wasn't entirely sure if they could get him back this time.

"Sure thing. Would you like a room on the bottom floor?" the little old woman asked, indicating Naomi's very obviously pregnant figure.

"Yes, thank you." Naomi placed a protective hand over her stomach and handed the woman the credit card that was in her back pocket, lowering her gaze to her hand again.

"Winchester, huh?"

Naomi's eyes left her left hand and looked up at the man now peering over the woman's shoulder, his eyes scanning her card before looking up at her.

"Um…yes," she replied hesitantly. _Shit, why did I have to hand over the new card?! Should I reach for the holy water now...or later? _

"My son served in the Marines with a guy named Winchester." The guy smiled at her as he took the card back from his wife and handed it to Naomi.

"I wouldn't know—it would have been on my husband's side." Naomi tried her best to smile as '_soon to be dead husband'_ rattled around in her head.

"Well, enjoy your stay, Mrs. Winchester." The woman smiled as she handed her the key.

"I will," Naomi said truthfully. She wasn't planning on wasting these last few days with her Dean.

The air enveloped her when she stepped outside of the little office, the neon sign casting shadows over the darkened parking lot. Naomi looked back into the office, her heart clenching painfully as she watched the old man and woman talk about something before he hugged her tightly_. _

_Why can't I have that with Dean? Why are we the ones to suffer_? Naomi rubbed her eyes, weariness and emotion making her lids feels heavy. Taking out her cell, she punched in his number, the task so familiar to her that it hardly even registered as conscious thought anymore. But a second later, Naomi bit down on her lip to stop herself from sobbing as his cell phone rang once before going straight to voice mail. She knew he had pressed the End button, making it readily apparent that he didn't want to talk right now. Knowing he wouldn't check his voice mail, she fought back the tears in her eyes and sent him a text instead.

"Hey Dean, Mystic Nights motel. Five minute walk from our wedding spot. you'll see it. Love you. Hurry up, okay?"

She didn't know what he was doing with the old woman's body, and she didn't want to know what he was doing. All she wanted was to wake up from the nightmare. With another quick scan of the parking lot, Naomi quickly walked over to her car and pulled the door open, half expecting to see Sam waiting there when she climbed inside. Looking at the room number on the key chain, she pulled out of the parking space and headed for the remote corner of the little motel, for once thankful to be far away and isolated from the rest of the world.

Grabbing the necessary bags from the trunk, Naomi took them into the room, one no different than any other they'd stayed in over the years: peeling paint, stained ceiling, threadbare carpet, and furniture that looked like it'd seen better days. The only thing that was different was the king-sized bed in the middle of the room in place of the usual two queens. _And there're no salt lines at the door or along the window sill. Shit_! Naomi dumped the bags on the bed and searched though them, looking for the salt.

Twenty minutes later, and it was done: every room, every window, every door, and every crack in the wall salted, the salt put away, the blinds drawn, and the light left on so Dean would know which room to go to. The next part came as easy as breathing, something she'd watched the boys do so many times: 9mm in the bedside cabinet drawer and the large Bowie knife under the pillow._ Dean will exchange that when he gets home, for the little one he keeps on his forearm, __all because__ I __managed__ to nick my arm __on the Bowie that time__. _

Naomi sighed and made her way to her green and white polka dot weekend bag and pulled out some pajamas. As she walked into the bathroom, Naomi heard the door click open and then close again. A small, sad smile graced her features as she started to undress, knowing fully well Dean would come to her when he was ready. She didn't bother to close the door—it was just him and her now. No Sammy, just Naomi and Dean. _And baby, _Naomi thought fondly, smiling as Junior kicked again. Stopping to listen to the movement in the other room, Naomi worked out that she had enough time for a shower before he came in.

She was proven right when Dean walked into the bathroom right as she pulled her nightgown over her head, her dampened hair sitting just on her shoulders when she freed it from the confines of the collar. She locked eyes with him in the mirror, barely concealing a gasp at the pain she saw in his green orbs. Dean didn't say anything, but then, he really didn't have to. Stepping out of his way so he could access the sink, she watched brokenheartedly as he turned the water on, his shoulders slumped in defeat, and his eyes glued to the mixture of blood and dirt slowly vanishing down the drain.

Naomi let a single tear fall down her cheek as she reached out for the soap, her hand covering it before his could_. You're not in this alone, Dean. This isn't just your problem_. As she took his larger hand in her smaller one, Naomi didn't know whether to feel relief that he submitted to her desire to be there for him or to feel disheartened that he was broken enough to let her help. Gently lathering the soap into his calloused palm, Naomi risked a glance at him, silently begging him to look at her, to face her, to let her in.

But Dean's eyes remained downcast, his defensive posture making it more than obvious that he wouldn't welcome conversation, nor would he offer it. All of which was making this job a whole lot more difficult than it had to be. _Please, baby, let me help you…I need you __to let me help you_. Naomi ran his hand under the tap, the water washing away all traces of dirt and blood, leaving nothing but clear running water. Taking the towel off of the rack Naomi carefully dried Dean's hand off, raising it to her lips and placing a tender kiss against his knuckles. She repeated the same process with the other hand, only this time placing a kiss in his palm as she gazed up at him expectantly, wanting him to look back at her, to say something. Sighing softly when he remained silent and distant, she pushed his coat off of his shoulders before taking his hands into hers and leading him into the bedroom.

She guided him to the bed, sitting him down gently, growing slightly more relieved when he scooted back so he was laying on his side, his arm stretched out in invitation for her. _Finally._ Smiling softly at him, she crawled up the bed and lay on her side facing him. Dean's lips grazed her forehead ever so gently, his breath warm on her cheek as she settled in closer to him, her hand slipping under the material of his shirt to rest on the smooth expanse of skin underneath, her fingers gently caressing the warm flesh. For as long as she could remember, touch had been the only guaranteed way to calm Dean down. Any kind of skin-on-skin contact worked—a gentle touch, sex, a sparring session with Sam.

_Sam, always fucking Sam._

Her eyes finding Dean's again, she leaned forward to place a kiss against his lips, half smiling at the way he nestled more closely against her, his eyes slipping closed. Naomi fought against the pull of sleep, wanting nothing more than to stay awake and watch over him. But her body had other ideas, and so with another gentle kiss to his lips, she finally gave in and let sleep claim her.

* * *

When Dean was certain that Naomi was asleep, he opened his eyes again. He wasn't ready to sleep. He couldn't sleep. It was all too weird for him to walk into the room and see only one bed. _She did do a good job with the salt lines…I guess I never gave her __much of a chance__ 'cause Sammy was always here to do it for her._ Naomi sighed softly in her sleep, pulling Dean's attention back to her and away from any thoughts he was about to have of Sam and the lack of Sam's presence in the room: no snoring, no random wake-ups in the middle of the night from dreams, no typing on the laptop or reading by flashlight—there was perfect silence, and perfect stillness, just two audible heartbeats in the room. She looked so peaceful when she slept, her eyelashes curling against her cheekbones, lips settled in a soft pout, her hair fanned across the pillow. Just watching her sleep stirred all kinds of memories in Dean's mind, days of staying in bed until he was too hungry to play, nights cuddled up watching the snow fall outside and some action flick on the TV, hours spent mocking horror films and watching her hide behind her hands or snuggle into his shoulder. The one memory though, the one thing that hurt the most was all the different memories of her fixing things merging together into the one big memory of her always being there to help him, to _save_ him. Pity she couldn't do that now.

Dean felt a tear begin to well up in his eyes, a single teardrop for every word he couldn't say to her, a single teardrop for every word he wouldn't get the _chance_ to say to her, a single teardrop for all the times he wouldn't be there to dry hers, and, God, did it hurt. Knowing that soon she wouldn't have anyone to protect her against the evil that was out there, that his son would have no one to protect him either, ate at his insides, causing his heart to clench painfully. Biting back tears, he eased himself out of her arms and slid off of the bed, careful not to wake her. He glanced around the room, looking for something, his eyes settling on her green bag. Looking back at her curled up in the bed, he stopped to cover her with a blanket before continuing over to the bag, taking out the notepad and pen he knew she always kept there. He was going to tell her everything one way or another.

* * *

_Sam, no! Sam, please leave him alone! Sammy, come on, you're better than this! No Sammy.._

"Sam!" Naomi yelled, sitting upright in the bed, the blanket falling from her shoulders, her hands running along Dean's side of the bed only to find it cold and empty.

"Dean!" she yelled, panic tightening her throat when there was no reply, her eyes searching desperately for him, but the motel room remained bathed in perfect darkness. "DEAN!" she screamed again, fighting against the covers that tangled around her legs. "Dean!" This time it was more of a broken sob, still met with no reply. "Dean." It emerged in a choked whisper, as she curled up into the mattress, an overwhelming sense of loss filling her.

_Dean's gone._

She sobbed harder, not registering the two strong arms that pulled her up, the soft skin of his chest, or the echo of his familiar heartbeat as Dean held her to him.

"Naomi, I'm here—I'm here, baby. It was just a nightmare, just a bad dream. Come on, princess, calm down," he whispered against her hair, his hand running up and down her back as he pressed kisses into her hair.

"Dean," she sobbed again, and he held her closer to him, rocking her gently in his arms.

"I'm right here, Mimi—I gotcha, it's alright, come on, it's alright." His hand left her back as he shifted her away to cup her jaw, forcing her eyes to meet his. "See, I'm here. _Right here,_ with you," he assured her. She hiccupped once, and Dean smirked at her. "Tell you what—next time I go to take a leak, I'll wake you up so you don't miss me that much, okay?" he joked with her. He _had _to joke with her, because if he didn't…_Hell__, if that's what a trip to the bathroom does to her, what will she be like when I'm gone for good? This is killing me to watch her like this so god forbid if I decide to let the game face slip. I cant expect her to deal with this shit with Sam and watch me fall apart too. I gotta keep smiling just a few more hours, pretend that my little brother going dark side and the fact that my wife and son are being left exposed to all the ugly sons of bitches that I ever hunted or didn't know existed to hunt. _The mask was back in place as he gazed at her, the years of practice of hiding emotions coming in handy at this moment in time.

Naomi's hand wrapped around his amulet, causing him to smile slightly down at her, and when her body shook with another hiccup, he couldn't help the small chuckle that escaped his throat.

"Yeah, I know—I'm just so damn irresistible," he said with a playful grin, trying to coax a smile out of her, or at the very least, settle her nerves a bit.

"Asshole," she swore, but there was no heat behind it, however, and she pressed a kiss against his chest, the thrum of his heartbeat under her lips.

"Yeah, yeah— but I'm a _lovable_ asshole," he laughed. "Come on, back to bed now," he said softly, an idea to which she shook her head in protest. "Naomi. Come on sweetheart, I'll be right here with you I promise," he said as he cupped her face in his hands, rubbing her cheeks soothingly with the pad of his thumbs.

"Not tired," she protested vehemently.Her eyes silently begged him not to pursue the issue further, and with a sigh, Dean pulled her down with him as he lay down. She couldn't dream that again. She simply couldn't run that risk.

"You went after Lilith without telling me—why?" Dean asked into he silence, he could tell Naomi was startled a little by the question, it must have come out of the blue to her, but for him, it was in his head and he needed answers.

"I wanted to help Sam, and I didn't realize she held the contract. Because if I'd known, she would be dead...well before now, anyway," she whispered.

"But why didn't you tell me?" Dean asked again, and Naomi looked up at him.

"Cause, it didn't seem all that important. She told me about Ruby, that she could bring Sam back. I was only trying to help, Dean." Naomi let her gaze drop back to the floor, and Dean sighed again, tilting her face to meet his.

"No more lies."_ I know she's not lying exactly, but there's something she's holding back._

"I'm not lying, Dean, she just... she told me...stuff." Naomi visibly shuddered at the thought and Dean subconsciously pulled her close to him, trying to protect her from whatever it was she had been exposed to.

"What did she say, sweetheart?" Dean pressed a kiss into her hair. _I have all night for this discussion._

"She told me about Jess, and your mom, and why she chose to let me live."

"You don't have to talk about it anymore, if you don't want to."

"She wanted me to live because she had planned for Sam to die...and well, she knew that if both Sam and I were gone, you'd follow us pretty damn fast. But if I lived, you'd tough it out for me. You'd suffer...for me. And when she told me that, Dean...I didn't want to tell you because...it scared me, Dean." Naomi let more tears fall, and Dean wiped them away, letting her rest back against his chest.

"It's okay, Mimi—I'm here, alright? We're safe, and we're gonna make every second count, okay?" He felt her nod against his chest and felt that she deserved to know the little something he was holding back..._ no more lies..._ his own voice resounded in his head.

"I didn't want this, you know," he whispered into the stillness of the room, and he could sense Naomi's confusion, feeling her brow furrow in confusion as he absent-mindedly smoothed her hair back from her forehead.

"Didn't want what?"

"For it to be this way...I guess I figured we'd find a way out of it in the end. But I want you to know—I don't regret what I've done," he confessed and Naomi raised her eyes to meet Dean's.

"With me or with Sam?" Dean's earlier conversation playing on her mind.

"Sam. And you. I don't regret _anything_ that I've ever done with you. I mean, sure, I regret some things that I _haven't_ done, but there's nothing I can do about that now," he said with a shrug, growing increasingly uncomfortable as he sensed how close he was to talking about things he never intended to talk about. _You're treading on dangerous ground, dude—pull back._

"You would still sacrifice yourself for Sam, knowing that things would end up this way—with him a demon and you still dying?" Naomi was utterly perplexed with that fact. Dean moved his gaze from hers to the ceiling. "You really would, wouldn't you?" A fresh wave of tears filled her eyes, and she leaned back down onto his chest.

"Yes."

Her bottom lip trembled with the effort it took to keep the tears back, and she let her eyes slide closed to keep the tears from falling. Without seeming to realize it, she drifted off to sleep again, completely missing Dean's warm tear on her head and his brokenly whispered words.

"I'm sorry."

* * *

Blinking open languid eyes against the bright daylight that poured in through the window, Naomi sighed against the warmth of Dean's chest, his strong, steady heartbeat and even breathing putting her slightly at ease. Pushing herself up, she smiled at how innocent he looked when he was asleep, as though the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders. She couldn't help but smirk at the slight lines at the corners of his eyes. _You're getting wrinkles, babe._ She smirked and gently traced her fingers over his face, his cheeks, his lips, his jaw. She loved everything about him: his annoying as hell smirk, his expressive green eyes, his soft pouty lips.

_He hasn't changed, _she thought as she watched him breathe._ Granted, he's gotten older, but nothing about him has really changed at all. His eyes are still the same shining green ones that captivated me in the library all those years ago, those lips are still the exact same lips that kissed me on that miserably rainy day in Mississippi, the day Sam left for Stanford. _Letting her eyes and hands roam lower, Naomi could barely resist the temptation to kiss every line that marred his golden brown skin. She had always hated the fact that there was another scar every time he came back home to her. Usually he was a fast healer and very rarely scarred, but that he had scars from wounds that were too deep to heal completely hurt her. Leaning down and pressing a kiss to the small scar just about his navel, Naomi smirked when his abdomen twitched under her lips.

"Morning," she smirked against his stomach, giggling when he reached down to pull her up, his hand cupping her jaw and bringing her lips to his.

"Afternoon, actually," his sleep roughened voice growled as he blinked the sleep out of his eyes.

"What? We slept that long?" Naomi asked, genuinely shocked at the length of time she had slept.

"Yeah, unless three in the morning is really light outside." Dean shrugged nonchalantly, and a pang of fear shot through Naomi's body_. He had forty-eight hours at midnight, which means he has roughly thirty-three now. I'm losing him, and there's nothing I can do about it. _She desperately fought back the tears and kissed Dean back with all the love she felt for him, tangling her fingers in his hair, holding him to her, remembering him all over again.

"Come on, Mimi," he groaned, "I gotta get showered—I stink. But hey, once I get out of the shower, we'll go get breakfast or lunch, brunch, whatever the hell it's called..."Dean trailed off as he plastered his trademark smirk on his face, "and what do you say we bring it back here, and then have some fun, huh?" He grinned at her, waggling his eyebrows, and she laughed, fingers tracing down his arms as he sat up.

"Can't you just stay here?" _Don't__ leave me, Dean._

"We gotta eat, babe." _I'll be back,_ his eyes seemed to tell her_,_ but with time running out, her fear was stronger than his guarantee.

"But we can call for some Chinese or something" _Please don't leave me._

"You actually _want_ to eat Chinese or pizza?" Beneath the seemingly mundane question, she could hear the underlying promise, his silent vow: _I swear I won't leave you._

"Yeah." _No, not really…I just don't wanna let you go._

"Baby, you've never been able to stomach Chinese, much less_ now _when you have a baby inside you, and you don't like pizza," he pointed out, a sceptical look on his face. But at the obviously pitiful look on her face, he relented with a sigh. "Tell you what, we can shower together and then we'll go to that little diner and get food. How does that sound?" _See, I won't leave you, I promise. _

"Okay." _Whatever, baby, just stay with me._

"Come on then, I'm starving."_Always__. _

Dean stood from the bed and extended his hand to her, holding her hand delicately in his as he led the way to the bathroom.

Dean pocketed the key as he watched Naomi watch the cars, the black metal glittering in the sun. His Impala and her Mustang, the two things that had started their relationship – well, the two things that were really just the one: their love of classic cars. Dean grinned at Naomi smile, and the fear finally began to creep up on him, the thought that he would never see her smile again causing a profound ache in his chest. Shoving that thought to the back of his mind before it could take hold, he snuck up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Can we get food, now?" he asked, his voice vibrating through her back.

"For the love of God, Dean, you have to stop doing that to me!" Naomi gasped placing a hand over her heart as she turned into him, ready to smack him only to smile at the sheer look of fun on Dean's face, opting to kiss him instead. "Fine, we can go," she stated and walked over to the Impala. Dean stopped for a second, allowing her to keep going as he scanned the perimeter._ Still no sign of Sam, I honestly thought he would have shown by now. He's ditched his cell at any rate, __and __Bobby hasn't seen him either_. When Naomi turned back to him and grinned, Dean plastered on the smirk for her benefit_.__She's trying so hard to make things okay…I've failed Sammy, but I won't let her down, too. _

"We're taking my car?" Dean asked, raising an eyebrow when Naomi stopped at the passenger-side door of his other girl.

"Yeah, if you think I'm letting you drive my car, you have another thought coming," Naomi replied with a smirk, pulling at the Impala's handle until Dean finally unlocked the door and let her climb in.

"So did you decide what you want to eat? My personal choice is anything that doesn't involve you hurling," Dean said as he backed out of the parking spot.

"You are such a thoughtful guy, Dean!" Naomi grinned, the sarcasm dripping from her voice. "Let's just go to the diner a few blocks from here," Naomi replied to his question absently as she rummaged through his cassette collection for something she actually liked.

"What?" Dean asked when Naomi gave an annoyed sigh.

"Why can't you like _my_ music?" Naomi asked, pushing the box back onto the floor and slouching in her seat with a disgruntled sigh.

"I think the actual question is 'why don't _you_ like _good_ music?'" Dean smirked at her, and Naomi scowled, glaring at the current AC/DC track that was blasting out of the speakers. Taking pity on her, Dean leaned over her and opened the glove compartment, fingers wrapping around a cassette and smiling when he pulled it out and shut the glove compartment, all while watching the road. Popping AC/DC out and putting the cassette in, he waited patiently for Naomi's scowl to smooth out and a smile to grace her features. It didn't take long—soon Naomi was not only smiling to the song that filtered through the car, but she was also singing along softly to Bon Jovi's "Thank You for Loving Me."

"_Lock the doors, we'll leave the world outside. All I've got to give to you, are these five words when I thank you for loving me: for being my eyes when I couldn't see, for parting my lips, when I couldn't breathe. Thank you for loving me, thank you for loving me_." Naomi sang along and intertwined her fingers with Dean's as she snuggled up to him.

_Yeah, _Dean thought_, Bon Jovi rocks. On occasion. _

* * *

"Dude, could she be any more obvious?" Naomi asked, clearly irritated by the busty blond waitress who was currently swaggering away from their table after practically throwing herself at Dean.

"Don't be so hard on her—she can't help it that I'm devilishly handsome," he said with a smirk.

"Yeah, but she should realize you're married. I mean, you're wearing..." Naomi trailed off as she spotted the unadorned ring finger of his left hand, her eyes falling away to gaze down at her plate. "There's an innocent explanation for that, huh?" she asked as a watery smile spread across her face. Dean's eyes look anywhere but at her as he dropped his left hand into his lap. "It doesn't matter." She managed a small shrug and picked up her knife and fork.

"Naomi, I--"

"No, Dean—I said it's okay. Guy like you doesn't wear a wedding ring, right?" She smiled at him, the tears and hurt shining from her eyes, and Dean let out a sigh as he picked up his fork, suddenly not very hungry, which was a first in itself. He couldn't help feeling guilty that he was still managing to hurt her.

_How can everything go so wrong in the space of a few minutes?_ he wondered as the waitress came back and stopped at their table.

"Can I get you anything else?" her sickly sweet voice sang, and Dean winced at the devastated expression on Naomi's face.

"No, we're good, thanks," he said, glancing at Naomi questioningly, his heart sinking as he saw the simple question burning in her eyes. _Are we_?"

"Well, if you think of anything, don't hesitate to call me over!" she said again, and Dean nodded, giving her a polite smile as he dismissed her from his mind and turned back to Naomi. But she wasn't looking at him, her gaze on the waitress instead, her expression suddenly unreadable.

"Go ahead and sleep with her if you want to." Dean's head snapped up from his plate to look at her, confusion and worry filling him. Naomi's voice didn't sound like her own, the words just seeming to have exploded out of her, and to Dean, it looked as though she hadn't really meant to speak.

"What?" he asked and Naomi looked back at him.

"Go sleep with her if you want." she repeated again, her voice still sounding odd to Dean's ears. "You're not doing a very good job of pretending you don't want her." Naomi let out a shaky breath and stood up. "I'll see you back at the motel. If you make it back," she said, her voice beginning to falter. They both knew how big an if that was. It didn't take a genius to know that she wasn't just talking about that night. She was talking about the future_. Which is looking pretty damn bleak right about now._

"Naomi!" Dean called after her, but she just kept walking, leaving Dean sitting there feeling like a fucking idiot as he yelled after her, the whole diner taking interest even as the blond waitress who started the whole damn mess came over and sat heavily on his chair, as though it was the perfect opportunity. _Thanks a lot, bitch._

"Are you sure there's nothing I can do for you?" a playful gleam lit up her scheming eyes, and Dean glared up at her.

"Yeah, how about you get the hell off my chair so I can go get my wife back?"

* * *

He didn't even have to think about where she would be. It was pure instinct. Dean drove the Impala back to the motel and walked back around to their wedding spot. He couldn't help the pain he felt at seeing her sitting there, her body shaking with sobs, know that he was the one that had done this to her. Not that he'd meant to. He slowly walked around to where she was and stopped a few paces behind her watching as she sat on the grass, wiping the fallen tears from her cheeks. He watched her play with her own wedding band, spinning it around her finger as she rocked herself back and forward, trying to ease the pain and stop herself from crying, no doubt. As he hesitated, she angrily wiped the tears from her cheeks, but the more she wiped them away, the more seemed to fall. "God damn it, Dean," she yelled into the open space, dragging her fingers through her hair and gripping onto it.

_Please. Not now. This can't happen, now. We don't have time._

Letting out a soft sigh Dean moved forward and sat beside her, not saying anything however.

"What're you doing here? I mean, I know I'm not enough, but I thought Blondie would keep you occupied for a few hours at least," Naomi spat out in between hurt, angry sobs, and from the shuddering sighs, Dean could tell she was trying desperately to stop crying, angry at herself as much as she was angry at Dean. His chest tightened at the pain emanating from her, wishing he could make it easy on her, that he _could _make her hate him, hate him so much that she wouldn't hurt so badly when he was gone. But he couldn't do it. He needed her too much.

"Naomi," he whispered, "listen to me…nothing happened between me and her, and I as sure as hell didn't _want _anything to happen. When I said "I love you" and "til death do us part," I fucking meant every word," he said harshly, wincing when the words emerged so harshly. But he needed her to believe him, needed her to know that he needed her as much as she needed him. "What part of that did you not understand?" he said forcefully, gazing back at her with growing desperation.

"All of it," she whispered, so quietly that Dean wasn't sure what she had said.

"What did you say?" he asked, his voice softer this time.

"I said all of it." Her bottom lip trembled as she turned to look at him. "Why did you marry me, Dean? I mean...why now? You've had ten years to do it, and you chose now—why? I need to know."

"Cause I wasn't gonna have another ten years to do it," he told her, feeling the press of time weighing even more heavily on him as he thought of all the years he'd wasted, years that he could have spent with her as his wife if he'd only gotten over his fear of commitment a long time ago.

"And it was only for three days, right? It would only be three days," she said, her eyes falling to the ground as her words registered in his ears.

"Naomi, I'm trying to understand here, but you've gotta help me out here—what are you getting at?"

"Did you marry me because you thought that's what I wanted?" she asked, the silent tears falling from her face cutting Dean deeper than any knife ever could have.

"Naomi, that's-"

"A yes?"

Dean blinked back his own tears when the familiar look of hurt passed her features and she smiled at him.

"No, it's a no. A hell no. I married you because I love you and because I wanted to. It was my idea, remember? I planned the whole thing—you weren't all that interested in the details, remember?" Dean said evenly. "Look, where is all this coming from?"

"Oh, Dean, who are we trying to kid here?" she asked him, leaning forward to wipe the single tear that rolled down her cheek. "You like your women, you like your drink, you love your hunt, your car, your Sammy—I don't fit in anywhere. I know that…I guess I always have. But I wanted this to work, and I love you too damn much to walk away and I'm sorry that I forced your hand," she explained sadly, and Dean shook his head, cupping her jaw and forcing her to look at him, wanting to make damn sure she heard him.

"You're wrong. Sure, I flirt—most men do—but I sure as hell don't mean anything by it, not with them. I love my _woman—_singular, not plural. So seriously, where is all this coming from? It can't just be that damn waitress," he said, raising his eyebrows questioningly, and it was Naomi's turn to shake her head.

"It's from the past few weeks...especially the past few nights." She allowed him to come closer to her. "You told me you wanted me to move on—after everything that we've been through, you just wanted me to move on. Then you told me you would do it all again, even if things with Sammy had still turned out the same. And well...in the diner...you weren't wearing your wedding ring. We've only been married three days."

Dean looked away and exhaled slowly.

"I'm sorry, but...I can't wear it," he bit out past the lump in his throat when he looked at her again.

"Why? Allergic to gold? It doesn't fit right? What?" _Please don't make me say it. _

"No, none of that. It's fine." he whispered, relieved when she allowed him to take her into his arms._ C'mon, baby, just let it go._

"But you can't wear it?" She was clearly confused, and Dean frowned against her hair. _Fuck. She's gonna make me say it._

"It hurts to wear it," he confessed, hoping it would be enough to satisfy her, but knowing he was likely only fuelling her curiosity.

"Is it too tight?" she asked, frowning in concern as she looked down at his hand.

"It hurts to look at it every day," he murmured, finally giving up on trying to keep it from her any longer. "Every time I move my hand, I see it there and I think about how much I'm losing, and about how much it kills me to know that what I've done is hurting you...So I took it off. Well, kinda." Dean shifted Naomi's weight and pulled the cord of his amulet out of his shirt, the gold wedding band gleaming next to the familiar amulet that Sam had bestowed upon him long ago.

"I'm sorry, Dean," Naomi whispered against his shoulder, her face flushing with embarrassment.

"Don't worry about it, Mimi—these things happen," he said graciously. "But you can make it up to me," he said, thinking of quite a few ways she could do just that, most of them not involving clothes. _That's right, baby—I'm not above taking advantage of a situation. Especially if it gets me hot sex with my girl. _She looked up at him with a familiar expression, the one she used when she was expecting to respond to his devilish smirk. But he didn't smirk, smiling down at her affectionately instead as the ache in his heart faded away, replaced by a peaceful serenity that Dean didn't often feel. She answered his smile with her own and he slowly closed his eyes and placed a kiss on her forehead and one on the tip of her nose before moving on to her lips, licking away the salty taste of tears as he kissed her passionately, his hand cradling her head to hers.

_It's gonna be okay._

* * *

Dean pulled her closer to him as they walked slowly back to the motel, laughing and joking._ This is as normal as I'm ever gonna get…__Maybe __I _should_ be __pissed __that its come this late, but __what is it that they say__...better late then never. __Yeah, that's it__. And as clichéd as __it__ is, I'm glad it's with her._

"You know what I think? I think that, deep down, you secretly like chick flick moments," Naomi announced, seemingly completely in tune with her other half, as the rounded the corner to the motel, and Dean pulled back, giving her an incredulous look.

"Are you kidding me?" he laughed, pulling her back into him again. _And God, why can she always do that!?_

"Well you've had quite a few girl-moments over the past few days—I was beginning to worry," Naomi told him, obviously trying to be serious but failing miserably as a grin made its way on to her face.

"Hey! For your information, my 'girl-moments,' as you call them, were not my fault," he retorted with a smirk.

"Oh really?" Naomi matched his smirk with one of her own. "And what would that be?"

"You see, there's this girl—best looking woman I've ever seen, like, _ever_—and she makes me laugh. She's just all around awesome. But she always wants to have these girl-moments, and what can I say? I just can't tell her no," he said, pulling Naomi as close to him as possible.

"She sounds like a nice girl, do I know her?" Naomi's smile widened.

"I dunno, maybe…her name's Angelina Jolie—ever heard of her?" Dean smirked, and Naomi punched him on the arm.

"Ass." She pushed away from him playfully, laughing when he pulled her back against him.

"But she has nothing on my wife, the mother of my son. You might know her." Dean's voice rumbled in her ear, his breath warm on her cheek.

"I dunno, I might."

"I'll introduce you." Dean's lips caressed her earlobe, and Naomi shivered.

"Don't do this to me now," she pleaded as they stopped at the motel room door.

"Why?"

"Cause I don't wanna fall asleep, that's why," she said truthfully, letting her head fall against the door.

"Naomi."

"Dean."

"Naomi."

"Dean."

"Oh for God's sake, I need to open the door, and you need to sleep."

"Do not," Naomi protested, forcing back a yawn as she leaned her head back on Dean's shoulder.

"Yeah, you do, babe—come on." Dean nudged her inside ahead of him, securing the door behind him as she sat down on the bed, trying desperately to hide a yawn with her hand. With an amused smile, Dean took one of his shirts from his duffel and handed it to her. "Go on," he told her, nodding in the direction of the bathroom, and with a roll of her eyes, Naomi grudgingly did as she was told, walking into the bathroom and slipping off her clothes.

Dean sat down on the bed and rubbed his hand down his face. _God, I need more time. I just need a chance to teach her everything she needs to know._ He had to teach her. He had to show her how to defend herself until she could call Bobby for help. _But she can't memorize everything. _Dean stood up and walked over to his duffel, taking out both his and his dad's journals before he sat back down on the bed, staring at the almost identical covers for a long moment. _Better get started if I'm gonna leave her with enough to keep her safe._

"Dean?" Naomi asked as she walked towards the bed, tucking one long leg underneath her as she sat next to him.

"You don't wanna sleep, and I want to keep you safe, so we're gonna compromise."

Naomi sighed but nodded, obviously willing to humor him, even if she didn't want to, as long as it meant she didn't have to sleep. And Dean couldn't bring himself to try and convince her otherwise. Not when he needed every moment he had left. _I'm sorry, baby, but we've gotta make every minute count. _

* * *

**24 Hours to go**

Naomi had given up hours ago and had fallen asleep, but Dean had ruthlessly pushed away the need for sleep, shifting his attention to numbering the pages of the journals and making a table of contents page for each. _How can I sleep knowing she won't be safe?_ Dean glanced at the clock and sighed. _This whole thing's gone south. Sammy was supposed to be here to help her through this, __to __make things okay when I'm gone but no, I still manage to screw that up and now he's God knows where, doing God knows what. I just need Naomi to be okay when I'm gone, but she's __not ready for this. A__nd hell, I'm no expert, but stress can't be good for __her _or_the baby._ Dean looked at Naomi, curled up under the comforter in his shirt, which remained too big for her no matter how much weight she claimed to have put on. Seeing her there reminded him of all the times when he'd go to her after a hunt and find her clad in one of his shirts, lying awake in the darkness, listening for him. Waiting for him. _Who will she wait on now? _Dean thought sadly as he watched her turn towards him in her sleep.

**20 Hours to go**

Naomi woke with a start, her heart pounding as though it would erupt from her chest. It was the same nightmare again, the same outcome, only this time, when she woke crying out for Dean, he was there right away, cradling her, kissing away the demons from her dreams. She had clung helplessly to him, no longer crying because there were no more tears left to cry. All that was left to do was to just hold him to her, to lay down with him and let him reassure her that it was okay, that he was here as she listened to the steady thrum of his heartbeat and silently pleaded with it never to stop. The baby seemed in on the act, too, kicking until Dean laid his hand over her stomach whispering soft, desperate words and murmuring promises that he couldn't keep, delivering false hope to the baby he'd never see, until at last, the baby stilled, and Naomi succumbed to the need for sleep that she kept trying so desperately to fight.

**16 hours to go**

Both Winchesters were awake. Dean made Naomi go over everything again, obviously more than aware that time was whittling down fast. It was as though something inside him was fueling him, Naomi thought, compelling him to show her everything he could. She knew the truth, though: time was running out, and he only had sixteen hours left to teach her how to protect herself. So here they were, reviewing everything _again_:holy water, salt, iron rounds, wrought iron rounds, silver bullets, salt-filled shotgun shells, Latin rituals, protection symbols, sigils, and traps. More weapons. More bullets. More guns. More rituals. More Latin. More tears. More kissing. More reassuring words. The cycle repeated, over and over again, swirling around and around in her head. It was slowly killing her, watching him suffer like this, trying to make sure she'd be protected when he was gone. _He's always thinking of someone else, never himself, never his own pain. God, Dean. _More tears. More of all but the one thing she wanted the most: Dean.

**12 Hours to go**

Naomi watched Dean shift restlessly in his sleep again, tossing and turning long after he'd finally given in to the need for sleep. She tried in vain to concentrate on her drawings, her multitude of colored fabric swatches, anything other than the painful truth. _Dean's going to die soon. I'm going to be alone. Our son __is never going to __know his daddy. He'__s never going to__ know how lucky he __wa__s to have a dad like Dean._ Naomi gave up and walked over to the bed, crawling in behind him, wrapping her arms around him, her lips close to his ear to breathe nonsensical and meaningless words into his ear, words that glossed over the real fact that this was precious seconds lost. Just like Dean had done earlier with their son, she was doing now, singing old songs like his mother would have done, trying to relax him into a peaceful sleep, and her efforts were rewarded when he stopped fidgeting in her arms and settled into the peaceful sleep that had previously eluded him. Even when he was resting, she kept up her pretty words, begging him not to leave her, pleading with whatever god was up there to let her keep him, but if she couldn't, to at least make sure that he was well cared for and well loved. Because Dean deserved to find some measure of peace, of happiness.

**8 hours to go**

This was the most ordinary moment they had shared in the past few hours—no demons, no deals, no weapons, no tears, no rituals. Just _them, _them and the memories they shared. Their memories, memories that were made to be looked back on, maybe not this early but to be looked back on all the same. Different states, different years, different stages of their relationship. Hunts gone wrong, arguments, making up, late night calls for a multitude of reasons. Just small talk, trying desperately to make things easier, knowing that someone will remember all those things too, someone who will understand the sacrifice and accept that it was worth it. Someone who will look back fondly on the times shared and the memories created, on a life lost and a chapter ended, only for a new one to begin. The flicker of hope remains that someone will remember and not forget.

**4 hours to go**

Small talk. Planning a future that wouldn't have Dean in it. And as hard as it was for him, he fought back the sense of loss that was beginning to envelop him, because this wasn't about him. It was about his son: what Naomi would call him, what type of school he would go to, how he should be told about Dean, _when_ he should be told about Dean, when he should drive a car, whether he should be told about hunting, and whether he should be given the choice to follow in his father's footsteps. Dean knew Naomi. He knew she wanted him to be a part of their son's life, regardless of whether he would be there or not. He was the baby's father. She gazed up at him, her eyes holding everything she wanted to say, but couldn't. _I love you._

Dean's eyes suddenly became unguarded, and she allowed the corners of her lips to quirk into a small smile at the sentiment she sensed in his gaze: _I love you too_.

It was there, and she saw it. Then he kissed her. _God, it feels like the first time. _

Her silent tears dripped down onto his chest as he eased her on top of him, his fingers weaving through her hair. And even though he didn't say a word, Naomi realized he didn't have to. Because even though he didn't have much time left, he still had enough to show her all the things he couldn't say.

**30 minutes to go**

Dean smiled softly as he watched her sleep. It was better this way, somehow easier than having her watch him walk out the door. They'd agreed that he would take the Impala and go alone, and that she would call Bobby when she woke up. Bobby would deal with the messy stuff—all she would have to do is make sure his corpse was torched. But then again, Bobby could deal with that, too. Her _real_ job was to look after herself and the baby.Easing himself off the bed and over to his duffel, he got dressed and took the envelopes he had hidden in the side pocket, staring down at them for a long moment before he slowly took his amulet off and removed his ring from it then slipped the amulet into the first envelope, the one addressed to his son. Running his fingers over the golden band, he sighed, fighting back the tears and placing the metal into the envelope before closing the it and turning to look at the for lettered word written as neatly as possible on the front: "Mimi." Swallowing back the tears, he made his way over to her sleeping form, placing the letters into her hand and kissing her on the lips.

"You were the best thing that ever happened to me, and don't you ever forget that. I love you—always have, always will. Take care of my baby. Both of 'em." He kissed her again and straightened, smiling down at her before he turned and walked away, completely missing the tear that rolled down her cheek.

* * *

Naomi waited, listening for the soft rumble of the Impala's engine fade before letting her tears take over, sobbing violently on the bed. A banging sound came from the door, but Naomi just lay there, trying to quieten down so maybe whoever it was would just go away and leave her the hell alone.

"Naomi, I know you're in there, open the god-damned door!" the voice came from the other side of the door and Naomi sat up, wiping at her eyes as confusion spread over her face. "Hurry the fuck up, princess—we don't exactly have a lot of time!" the voice came again, and Naomi all but ran to the door, jerking it open to reveal the blond-haired, black-eyed demon. "Finally—took you long enough!"

"What the hell are you doing here, Ruby?" Naomi asked furiously.

"Naomi, we don't have time for this," she said with a sneer. "And if you're through wasting my time, we can still save your dumbass husband."

"What!?" Naomi yelled, hurriedly rushing back into the room to pull on her blue jeans and a top. "How?" she asked as she struggled with her tennis shoes.

"Lilith's plan could still go off without a hitch if we don't do something fast."

"She's dead, Ruby."

"But Sam's not."

* * *

Dean climbed out of the Impala and sat on the hood, glancing down at his watch one last time. _Five minutes, _he thought. _Wonder if Naomi's awake._ He shuddered at the thought before he caught sight of movement, his eyes immediately focusing on the figure walking towards him.

"Sam?" he asked, fear creeping like needles through his veins_. Just when I was beginning to think I'd never see the kid again, and he appears minutes before I'm supposed to die—how ironic. Guess I'll get my last goodbye after all, huh?_

"Hey, Dean." And there was that dimpled Sammy smile, the one that got Sam everything he wanted from Dean.

"You here to take my soul?" Dean asked straightening up, bracing himself, readying himself.

"No, Dean. You're not going to hell. Thankfully." Sam added the last part so quietly that Dean wasn't sure if he had actually said it.

"Then...what?" Dean raised an eyebrow, genuinely intrigued as to where Sam was going with this.

"You have your destiny, and I have mine."

"DEAN!" The blood-curdling scream brought Dean spinning around, his eyes widening in horror.

"Naomi?" _What the hell is she doing here? __She can't be here, now! I'm out of time!_

"DEAN, NO!" Naomi screamed again, breaking into a run. Dean turned back around to face Sam just in time to feel a sharp excruciating pain erupt in his chest, then nothing as Sam caught him and lowered him to the ground.

"I'm so sorry, big brother. It's in the glove compartment," he whispered against Dean's cheek, his tears silently falling hitting the leather of his big brother's jacket. Dean's eyes widened when Sam looked back at him_. Shit Sammy, what's happened to you? Why did you let her do this to you goddammit?_ Dean spotted Naomi running towards him, and fear as intense at the pain throbbing in his chest was suddenly duelling for his attention._ Don't hurt her! Please don't hurt her, Sammy! _But the words wouldn't come out, despite Dean's desperate attempts to plead with his little brother. _Why…can't I… …__ Naomi? _

Naomi reached them, shoving Sam away as she dropped to her knees and pulled Dean to her, holding him as still as possible as flashing lights and sirens began to echo in the distance. Distantly, Dean was aware that Sam was running in the other direction as Ruby gave chase. But he couldn't seem to find the energy to protest.

"Naomi," he managed in a choked whisper, the burning pressure on his chest making it increasingly difficult to breathe, to speak. _Too much...gotta…make…it..go…_

"Come on, Dean, come on, you can do this," he heard her saying, her voice soothing him, willing him through this, trying desperately not to look at the hilt of the Bowie knife sticking out of Dean's chest. "Come on, baby, fight this—fight for me, fight for Junior, yeah?" she whispered, placing his hand on her bump, her hand on his, her eyes leaving his for a mere second, but long enough for Dean to pull the blade out on a scream.

"NO!" Naomi sobbed, her hand pressing against his chest, the blood seeping through her fingers.

"I'll…always…fight for…you," he grit out, and Naomi looked at him, her beautiful blue eyes seeming to waver as he struggled to focus on her.

"Hold on, Dean, help will be here. Please, I need you!" she yelled, leaning into his touch when his hand came up to cup her cheek.

"Always," he whispered again, this time a little less coherent than the first. "Don't..." he began, pausing to swallow back the blood that was beginning to pool in his mouth. "Don't hate…Sammy. Please," he forced out, the blood beginning to trickle from his mouth.

"I won't, but you'd better stick around to make sure I don't." She tried to laugh and be serious all at once, the tears that fell wiped away by Dean's gentle touch.

"Won't leave you...ever," he said on a ragged gasp, struggling to stay, to say everything he wanted to say, to hold on just a little longer.

"Dean, come on, fight for me," she pleaded, leaning down to place a kiss on his lips after she wiped away the blood.

"Always," he said again, the words a mere mumble this time, a cold feeling starting to overtake him, even as Naomi began to sob on his chest, begging him to stay as her tears mingled with his blood.

_I'm sorry__._

And as his hands dropped from her face, and his eyes slipped shut, she knew it was too late.

* * *

PLEASE DONT HATE ME! I ahve an idea for a sequel if you guys are interested and I would do it for you I promise! LOL So what did you think? Hope you guys dont mind i took the BonJovi moment and made it totally Dean/Naomi... I apologise if you did.

Anyways, Thanks again! I love you all!

K

xox

* * *


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